OMG...where is my mind?  

ThisHandleRox 39M
4 posts
8/9/2005 9:22 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

OMG...where is my mind?

I'm fairly innebriated as I write this. Forgive any typos or bad grammar.

It's been a while since I posted to this stupid thing, but I feel like I need to. I have a question for all of you. I'm tired of posting and not getting any feedback, so hopefully some of you respond.

How does one stop loving? At least, how does one put aside feelings of love to just enjoy life? Or is love so much a part of life, that you can't ignore it and you just cope with the pain?

I can't figure it out. It's my dilemma, and it leads to nothing but heartache. I understand why people become players, and I almost respect them. I've been through just as much if not more heartache as the next, but I just can't do it. Honestly, it's the pits. I wish I could have been given someone else's heart, because this one feels too much and hurts. I'm tired of carrying it.

I have to drink just to numb some of the thoughts and emotions. It seems like people just don't feel on the same level as me. I can't stand it, and myself, sometimes.

BTW: I recommend everyone try absinth sometime. It's good stuff.

BTW: I'd also recommend divorce. It builds character, but sucks a** at the same time. Seriously, I can't believe how much easier it is to get married than it is to get divorced. Gotta love the lawyers.

My trailblazer continues to get pimped. I changed to new taillights which are H-A-W-T, as one of my better friends would say. New headlights are on the way, along with a new dashboard cluster. Stuff to do when you're bored. At least cars still bring me some level of happiness.

I've felt so numb lately, and not much breaks through that. A friend did recently, and it stirred up all kinds of emotions. I don't know what's going on in my mind these days. I feel like I'm drowning to be honest. Help me green fairy! LOL.

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