Falling in love w/ a close friend.  

TheRox333 29M
11 posts
8/10/2006 3:11 pm
Falling in love w/ a close friend.

For some reason or another, i end up falling for one of my best female friends. This has happened repeatedly, and im sure is not uncommon. I don't really know what to do about it either. Logically i tell myself to ask out a woman before we become too close, but i never really get a crush on a girl until we have become extremely close. Im not sure if i should just ask out a girl if we've talked for a little while and i think she is cute or should i wait to find out her personality well first. It seems like the longer i wait to ask out a woman the more of myself i put at risk.
The reason why im wondering all this is because i asked out one of my really close female friends. I really liked her, physically and mentally but the whole thing was, i was never able to figure out if she liked me. So eventually i told her how i felt. But kinda like the worst way possible. I planed a whole way to tell her, but wut happened was i got drunk at a party i threw and told her while drunk (so my entire plan on how to tell her was lost). She ended up telling me that she didnt think of me that way. Later that night we hung out in my hot tub. She got REALLY drunk, and on a dare ended up taking off all her clothes (something that i would have never thought she would do) in front of my friends. SHe then proceded to flirt with everyone. This was the first time she met most of my friends, so now they all kinda see her as a whorish girl. Eventually my best friend and i ended up making out w/ her in the hot tub. At this point, all of us are drunk and now nude. It seemed kinda like she was feeling my friend more, but yet i was still making out w/ her and caressing her nude body and she did not try to stop me at all. The whole thing felt wrong. I didnt want to share her, but i didnt want to just let her spend all her attention on my best friend when i cared so much about her. This lasted all night as none of us even got to go to sleep (no sex was involved, neither my best friend or i liked the idea of having sex w/ the same girl at the time).
The next day i called her and told her, "i know that she has a crush on my best friend", she admitted it; and i told her that she can't date him. I know that seems wrong and harsh, but my friend and i have been best friends for years and her dating my best friend would make me resent my best friend (by the way, my best friend said he didnt realize that i had a crush on her and basically apologized for making out w/ her; even though yelled at me for not stopping him). The conversation ended by her being annoyed at me for telling her who she can date, but she did tell me she wouldnt date him if i don't want her too. However, and understandibly, we haven't talked in about 2 weeks, even though i have called her a few times since then. Do you think she doesnt want to be friends anymore? Should i just keep on trying to talk to her? I really dont want to lose a close friend out of this.

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