Easy Questions ...  

TheQuietGuy2005 54M
3484 posts
1/26/2006 11:38 am

Last Read:
4/30/2008 3:47 am

Easy Questions ...

Can we ever manage it? Did the Saints of old ever really succeed? Did the Buddha?

No matter how hard we try, are we all doomed to hurt some of those who come into contact with us?

Is it true that "we always hurt the ones we love" ... or is it more true that we always hurt those who love us?

If we're in a situation where we either hurt ourselves or else end up hurting someone else, which should we do?

If we hurt someone, does it really matter in the end whether it was through intention, through carelessness or entirely unanticipated?

Tonight I'm fresh out of answers ...

... nor do I expect anyone else to provide them!


papyrina 50F
21133 posts
1/26/2006 12:15 pm

i would rather hurt my self than any one i loved,but in saying that a simple thing can hurt the ones we love and those who love us,its because they love us or we love them that this happens,respect,honor,humilty,pride are all stuff we give and recieve and all so easy to trip up on,

and the beauty is if its one who loves or we love they always forgive as we should them.

i don't think i make sence at all,

wanders off thinking

I'm a

i'm here to stay

pinkplaytoyz 49F

1/26/2006 12:40 pm

Hmmmm, I'm going to take a stab at that, lol, no pun intended...
What is crucial to everyone's "karmic" balance is the person's INTENT.
Unintentional hurt does not affect the balance.
Intentional hurt does.
Hurting oneself affects your balance.
How someone reacts is not your responsibility, unless your INTENT is to manipulate their reaction. It is wrong.
Intend evil, reap evil
Intend good, reap good
As above, so below

Does that help any?

brightblonde3 57F

1/26/2006 1:14 pm

Risk is part of life...and when we take risks, sometimes we hurt, sometimes we are the ones who are hurt.

There's no true way to avoid it. If we completely avoided the possibility of injury, either to ourselves or to others, we'd never progress. As long as no malice was intended or cruel behavior involved. I think most of these matters can be talked out with the people involved...a lot depends on the maturity and experience of all concerned.

Then, life goes forward...

Smooches, BB3

rm_elfandmaiden 50M/56F
59 posts
1/26/2006 1:14 pm

I would have to agree with pink on this INTENT is the key to the whole question and answer. You also have to understand that nobody is perfect and even with the best INTENTIONS at some point somebody is going to get hurt, this is an unfortunate fact of the human equation.

rm_saintlianna 45F
15466 posts
1/26/2006 2:42 pm

Yes I did. Ahem.

MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
1/26/2006 5:12 pm

Yes we are doomed to hurt people who come into our lives. No, we don't hurt the ones we love, we hurt the ones who love us. If they didn't love us, it wouldn't hurt. Self-preservation is said to be the first law of nature. However, most people would give their lives for their child and in some cases, their partners. Yes, it matters. If we hurt someone with intent, we are setting out to hurt them in some way, even if our intentions are good. The road to Hell is paved on good intentions, remember.

freetime648 52F

1/27/2006 2:27 am

I tend to take the hurt upon myself. I am not good with hurting someone else, intentionally or not. I hate seeing friends and family hurting and it tears my soul to be the cause of any of the hurt. But, you cannot ask the question until you have been there......that is if you truly want an answer....

xx FREETIME648 xx

warmandsexy52 64M
13164 posts
1/27/2006 11:47 pm

To be yourself, truly yourself, may be in conflict with the common ground with those you love and are loved by. However, to love and be loved by for any length of time and to any depth leads to a denial of those things that self-fulfilment demands, sometimes to the point of self-sacrifice itself. Reconciling these fully is impossible - such is the paradox of the human condition.

We only live once and are a long time dead, as they say, so the desire for self-discovery is great. Repressing this leads to a depth of frustration that can express itself in things we do and say that will hurt. Expressing this leads to the irreconcilable conflict with those you share love if you are honest, and worse if not and the truth comes out. One way or another, if you have any sensitivity there is a high chance you will hurt and be hurt by those with whom you share love.

Beyond that we are human, with most of experience being a learning experience. So we make mistakes, we miscalculate, we lay down paving stones on the road to hell, we fuck up and these things hurt both ourselves and others.

As important as the fact that we will hurt others is the desire, effort and ability to heal such wounds when they occur, for untreated and unhealed, hearts can be broken.

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