Advertising Cliches ...  

TheQuietGuy2005 54M
3484 posts
9/6/2005 9:33 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Advertising Cliches ...

John Camm recently came up with a list of cliches for the BBC Magazine that he thinks make up an unofficial 'Advertising Bible':

1. Men are obsessed with sex but will forego sex in order to watch football or drink beer.

2. Women are locked in a constant battle with their weight/body shape/hairstyle.

3. Career success is entirely based on your ability to impress your boss.

4. Mums are often harassed but NEVER depressed/unable to cope.

5. Any act of male stupidity (e.g. walking across a clean floor in muddy boots, putting the dog in the dishwasher, etc.) will be met with a wry smile, not genuine annoyance/anger.

6. Married men will flirt with other, younger women but NEVER act upon it.

7. Anyone with a scientific career will have a bad haircut and dreadful clothes.

8. If you work for the emergency services, you are a better person than the general population.

9. Elderly relatives NEVER suffer from senile dementia.

10. Scandinavians are, without exception, blonde and beautiful.

11. Women have jobs they never do in real life, e.g. dockworker (who looks like a model).

12. Children will not eat fruit or vegetables. Ever.

13. Both men and women find driving deeply pleasurable, never boring or stressful.

14. Men are inherently lazy/slobbish; women are the reverse.

15. Chocolate, however, will cause women to immediately fall into the languor of the opium eater.

16. High Street bank staff are ( A ) friends of the customers, and ( B ) of slightly above-average attractiveness (only if female).

17. Modern men own a cat.

18. Hot beverages have miraculous rejuvenating effects.

19. Professional people have strangely trivial preoccupations, e.g. a female barrister who is morbidly obsessed with finding a healthy snack bar.

20. All women (except stay-at-home housewives) have interesting and enjoyable careers.

21. Any over-the-counter medical product will work instantly and 100% effectively.

22. Children know more than adults.

23. Women never merely hop in and out of the shower, instead preferring to act out some sort of soapy Dance of the Seven Veils.

24. School is a happy experience for all children.

25. Tortilla chips are the most exciting experience any group of young people can experience.

26. Playing bingo is THE number one pastime among 18-25 year old British women.

Feel free to add your own!


AlbertPrince 58M

9/7/2005 3:07 am

If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

AlbertPrince 58M

9/7/2005 3:08 am

All grocery shopping involves the purchase of French loaves which will be placed in open brown paper bags (Caveat: when said bags break, only fruit will spill out).

AlbertPrince 58M

9/7/2005 3:09 am

It is always possible to find a parking spot directly outside or opposite the building you are visiting.

slightly_sexy8 38F
314 posts
9/7/2005 5:43 am

those were the good old days, down at the bingo hall, eating doritos.

helga_hansen 49F  
1987 posts
9/7/2005 10:29 am

*Helga agrees that Scandinavians are, without exception, blonde and beautiful*


Love, hugs and kisses from ♥♥HH♥♥

TheQuietGuy2005 54M
2386 posts
9/7/2005 10:16 pm

Al ... You're right! The dance moves in particular get me - it's the same with musicals too ... I never realised the ordinary man and woman in the street could be so spontaneous or so talented. Which, I guess, just goes to emphasise how abnormal I am

Slightly ... Please accept the prize for Most Amusing Response on a Wednesday!

Helga ... Could I possibly argue with you, ma'am?

sweetthang2877 40F
534 posts
9/9/2005 11:48 pm

You know, when I was 19, I used to sit down at the bingo hall eating doritos? No...seriously!!!

#30. All women who hang out on beaches look like Barbie Dolls!! And the men all look like Gallagher!!

Gawd I hate those commercials!

sweetthang2877 40F
534 posts
9/9/2005 11:50 pm

#31. Rich old men have nothing better to do than to ride around in their limos eating crackers with mustard on them..."Pardon me sir, do you have any..."

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