Fucking horse's  

Tala4u2 54M  
2089 posts
3/25/2005 9:11 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Fucking horse's

Domesticated animals are driving me up the bloody wall today namely a frigging cat and dog at least if they were frigging i could put them on web cam and they would stop irritating the fuck out of me. You may have guessed it I am pet sitting! Which is not normally a chore at all but in this case I have taken the couple's dog and their new kitten all fun and game's I tell you, for them not fucking me. I don't have pets for a simple reason they are animals and do not provide me with any solace at all, "Pussy" is the closest I like coming to any sort of pet realationship.

Animals cause nothing but strife and the poor bloody owner is always to blame high on my list of "NOT my favorie animal" is the horse. Horses are evil, people are always telling me how their horses are great creatures and can do wonderful things and then warn me to not get to close! They bite, kick, headbutt and tread on people feet and get away with it. And to the people who ride them why do you tell me to be careful and then ask if I want to ride one, sure and while we're at it how about blindfolding me and letting me play in the traffic on a freeway during peak hour. Wow that would be fun too. History proves how insane these animals are and people carrying the blame for them. When you see any depiction of people in times past riding horses, why are they always carrying shields and swords and lances? To stop the fucking horse! Jeebus even medieval Knights had to where suits of armour to protect themselves from the bad human damaging behavior of their horses! Poor bloody Ghengis Khan was living happily in the Mongolian steppes siring children, erecting tents and drinking fermented "MARE"S milk doing no-one any bother at all when after a particularly big night and day on the Mare's milk him and his mates hopped on their horses and went for a ride. Before they could stop the fucking horses they had conquered China and most of Eastern Europe, not because they wanted to they just couldn't stop the horses. Of course the people living in those lands saw this horde of mongols come riding over the hills screaming and waving swords and shields as they belted the horses over the head to try and stop them and mistook this for an invasion of fierce warriors and not what it really was a group of terrified pissed nomads trying to slow the horses down long enough to get off the back of the fuckers. The trojans where quite happily withstandin the seige of Troy and what happened some dickhead seen a horse on the beach and brought it in side and the next thing they know the whole bloody race is consigned to a footnote of people who got their asses kicked in history! Gambling a great way to lose your money house home friends and family and what to we gamble on? Gerbils, Hamsters, Frogs, No fucking horses again!
So if people wonder why I avoid riding horses the previous text should inform them quite well that it is historical precedent that has me thinking this way and nothing at all to do with the fact that I do trust the people who own the horses and appreciate their kind, generous offers of enjoying a canter over hill and dale.


Tala, Wizard of The Kingdom of BooBoBia, DEITY,
PERVlander


wyvernrose 38F
3895 posts
3/26/2005 6:08 am

Animals are very much like people Tala, the only difference is animals do not deceive, they are what they are, people are as likely to stab you in the back as blow you for hours,

animals at least you know what to look for know what to expect, the only reason people would tell you to be careful and keep back, is likely because they don't think you know what to expect, I have been around animals- horses, dogs, cats (allergic), fish, birds, my whole life, and personnally I would rather deal with a horse needing to be reshod than a lesbian in a dark nightclub.......at least I know the horse is in a bad mood and what to do to fix it.....

WyvernRose


Tala4u2 54M  
2961 posts
3/26/2005 3:39 pm

pmsl, oh guru of mystery your labia overfows with the juices of knowledge!

Tala, Wizard of The Kingdom of BooBoBia, DEITY,
PERVlander


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