humour for him and her  

Sweetgenie_girl 41F
326 posts
12/9/2005 8:14 am

Last Read:
8/26/2006 11:01 am

humour for him and her

For him:

MARRIAGE QUOTES BY MEN

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out...'

Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the California lottery!' Martha replies, 'Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?' The man responds, 'I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!'

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street bald and still think they are beautiful!

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months--I don't like to interrupt her.

If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose, would you go to lunch or to a movie?

A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

For her:

MAN OF YOUR DREAMS

RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE WITH THE FOLLOWING QUALIFICATIONS:
1. WON'T BEAT ME UP
2. WON'T RUN AWAY
3. HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED

For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was ringing constantly, she received tons of mail...all to no avail. None of the men seemed to meet her qualifications.

Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to find a man, with no arms and no legs, lying on the welcome mat. Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you and what do you want?"
"Hi," said the man "Your search is over, for I am the man of your dreams. I've got no arms, so I can't beat you up and I've got no legs, so I can't run away."

The old woman asked, "What makes you think you're so great in bed?"

To which he replied, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"


rm_txscorpion 42M
206 posts
12/9/2005 6:34 pm

You are silly girl! Hope you've been doing well. Been missing you.

~Scorpion~

~The Scorpion King~


smileguyqc 53M

12/13/2005 8:47 am

Tks for the laugh Sweetgenie... hmmmm just how did he manage to ring that bell? By the way, marriage isn't so bad


NaughtyNurse514 30F

12/13/2005 1:06 pm

OMG! That made my day Thanks Genie


Sweetgenie_girl 41F

12/13/2005 3:40 pm

Hehehehe!!!! I'm glad I could make your day!!!!

Keep smilling people


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