Early morning around the scatter  

Straycatsetsuko 61F
96 posts
12/4/2005 4:34 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Early morning around the scatter

Sitting here, drinking my second can of diet coke, and munching my shredded wheat, thinking about my life as it is, was, whatever. I just kicked Moe, cat extraordinaire and general pain in the patoot, off my lap, he's, of course, trying to get back on. Purring real nice for Mom, who wants to use her hands.

I've felt under siege the last few months, the job thing, creditors, everything breaking down, septic problems, car problems (got the brakes fixed, now the muffler is making noise), just in general wading through a whole lotta stuff.I can handle it all, gotta breathe occasionally, but I can handle it.All but what happened with Rockdancer. Man, that is staying with me and won't go away. Keep trying to put one foot in front of the other, but feet are hesitating, and I can't stop looking back, even though I know I have everything to look forward to. What's wrong with me? Gotta move ahead.

I called a credit counsellor and talked with them on Thursday. The guy was great, but you could tell he was used to dealing with a bunch of idiots.

We went over my living expenses, then my debt. We discussed my finances in detail, then he asked me what happened. I told him I'd lost my job and didn't qualify for unemployment. I'd been taking in mending, making and selling soaps and toiletries, refinishing furniture, repairing electrical stuff, taking odd jobs, but it really didn't bring in much. My utilities are still on, but I'm living on borrowed time with them. I just got a job, and I just want the creditors to call off the dogs.

He gave me details of the offer they're going to make to the creditors, lower the interest rate, and, after 3 payments through these folks, they'll stop tacking on late fees.

Ever since then, I've just wanted to sleep. I nearly fainted when I got the job offer, and kept expecting someone to tell me it was a dream, and I don't really have a job. 16 hours of OT this week cured that, but getting this off my shoulders, handing the credit mess to someone else to tame, I've just felt so relieved, all I've been doing is going to work, and practically passing out when I got home.

Today, I'm going to get cat food, then purr and rub against Apathyman to buy me a cord of wood, and I'll pay him back in the Spring.

Still miss Rockdancer like a physical pain sometimes. I'll muddle through.

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