How Trav made his great escape part 4 B....the jig is up! ...NOT!!!  

Sorceror07 54M
6063 posts
3/28/2006 3:18 pm

Last Read:
8/1/2007 12:13 pm

How Trav made his great escape part 4 B....the jig is up! ...NOT!!!

The Misadventures of TravelinginTexas and Sorceror07

How Trav made his great escape part 4 ....the jig is UP!
how Trav made his great escape, part 3
how Trav made his great escape, part 2
How TRAV made his great escape....
JAILBREAK!!!! ...TravellinginTexas has escaped prison!

….meanwhile, 1000 yards across the other side of that road and far from the triumphant posse'… Trav and Sorc were low-crawling with all their gear toward a barn.

Trav: “What did that sign say?”
Sorce: “The sign warning of attack dogs?”
Trav: “I was afraid that’s what it said…”
Attack dogs: “GRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!”
Trav & Sorce: “NYAAAAYAAAYAAAA!!!!!”

They got up and ran their asses off towards the barn, the attack dogs close behind nipping at their heels.

Sorce: “Do attack dogs like twinkies?”
Trav: “I don’t know!!!”
Sorce: “Ok… I’m going to try something,… just keep running to that barn!”
Trav: “OK!”

sorceror07 took out a twinkie he had stashed, unwrapped it, caught the attack dogs’s attention and tossed it a few dozen yards left of them. They went for it! Tearing themselves up in an effort to be the one to get the twinkie!!

travelingintexas I KNEW IT! You twinkie stealer! You DID steal my last twinkie!
Sorce: “You can ask the dogs for it back if you wish…”
Trav: “Bastard!”
Sorce: “Shut up and keep running!”

They made it to the barn, quite unscathed and very out of breath! Inside the barn was micahbiguns pride and joy: a 1966 Montero Red Pontiac GTO with a white convertable top. Under the hood a blown, balanced, bluprinted, ported and polished 421 tri power hooked to a M21 Rockcrusher 4 speed putting out 900 hp to the rear wheels.

Trav: “I can’t believe you stole my twinkie!”
Sorce: “Aww! Get over it already.”
Trav: “Damn, my lady thong is riding up on me again!”
Sorce: “Your wig needs to be adjusted too…”
Trav: “STFU!”
Sorce: “Lets load up and ride man! …we have a long ways to go.”
Trav: “I have to make a phone call.”
Sorce: “You can’t, everyone thinks we’re dead, lets leave it like that for the time being.”
Trav: “But… but! My blog! I have to post to my blog!! It’s popularity is dwindling I’m sure! Woe is me! Woe is me!”
Sorce: “…comment whore…”

The GTO started with a throaty roar, scaring all the barnyard animals. Sorce put the top down on the car and floored the gas pedal…. “YEAH!! Now THAT’s what I’m talking about! WOOHOOOOOOOO!”

They hit the highway doing 150mph and never looked back… not stopping until they reached…

tillerbabe “What time are you expecting them?”
Michael_ig65 “If reports of their untimely demise were greatly exaggerated then I expect them in 15 minutes.”
Tiller: “Good, then we have time for one more then don’t we?”
Michael: “Perhaps, pet… perhaps.”

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!! *Tiller’s dogs go nuts barking and carrying on*

Tiller: “DAMMIT!”
Michael: “Stay just like that, pet.”
Tiller: “ !!!!! “

Michael answers the door, seeing (and smelling) a very disheveled school girl and his(?) escort… a grungy dirty metal musician toting a black leather bound briefcase with the initials M.W.

Michael: “Enter!”
Tiller’s dogs: “Arffff! Arfff! Arfff! Hah!hah!hah!hah! LICKJUMPLICK!”
Sorce: “Hello Michael, ..you know Trav right?”
Trav: “Hello Michael, where’s Tiller?”
Michael: “Where you can’t find her, I heard about that kiss you gave to princesskarma
Trav: “ACK!!!! That dog just shoved his snout up my ass!!”
Sorce: “He likes you, Trav… he wants to be your friend… your ‘special’ friend… he wants to call you Ned!”
Trav: “STFU YOU!”
Michael: “No one saw you coming here, did they?”
Sorce: “No chance, we gave everyone the slip back in Missouri.”
Michael: “Good, I’ll take that briefcase now.”

Sorce hands Michael the briefcase. Michael opens it up… a golden glow escapes it, illuminating everyone’s faces. The room is stricken in awe! Even the dogs quiet down…

Tiller: “Michael! Let me come out there, I want to see!”
Michael: “Sorceror, you did well, VERY well… I may even consider letting you play with my pet.”
Sorce: “Thank you Michael, I will even consider letting you play with my pet too.”
---Trav looks nervous---
Sorce: “No… I’m referring to metalmama69
---Trav looks relieved---

Michael: “You gents look like you can use a shower and a change of cloths.”
Trav: “Oh yeah! This lady thong I’ve been wearing for the last few days is really chaffing my ass!”
Sorce: “A shower would be very appreciated yes!”
Michael: “Tillerpet, see to our guest’s needs.”
Tiller: “Yes, Sir.”

tillerbabe came out of the bedroom, her hair dyed black now… Michael smiled with satisfaction, Trav fell out of his lady thong and Sorce exclaimed, “Damn, Tiller! You DO look exactly like my 2nd ex-wife!”
Tiller: “And what’s that supposed to mean, Mr. 07?”
Sorce: “It means that at one time I was married to someone about as hot as you are.”
Michael was amused and smirked, Trav nodded, “nice recovery, putz.” Tiller smiled ravishingly.
Sorce: “Can I take that ice cold shower now please?”
Trav: “NO! Me first! I need a cold shower more than he does… he at least got to cyber metalmama69 a few days ago… all I had was a toothless redneck named Buck Naked back in my prison cell!”
Michael: “But Trav, didn’t you tag every ass on the planet?”
Trav: “Ancient history!!! I have needs you know!”
Michael: “Speaking of tag… Tiller, my pet, I have a special gift for you, which Sorceror and Trav have risked life and limb to deliver to us, which Mr. Nuttz risked certain death in “acquiring” it from a certain mobster by the name of Marcellus Wallace. Many people have died over this artifact. And now, I present this gift to you, my pet…”

Michael opened up the case for Tiller and showed her the gift… a solid gold double jelly dildo with vibrating PinK action! A one of a kind adult artifact and custom made for the holiest of holies.

Tiller: “OH Michael!!!” …and they quickly retired themselves to the bedroom, leaving our heroes to fend for themselves.

Trav: “Take a shower bro, I’m looking for the twinkies.”
Sorce: “There’s no twinkies here, all you’re going to find is power bars and Gatorade!”

After a while… once everyone saw to their needs…

Sorce: “Michael, Tiller… next week there’s a HOT-TUB PARTY AT METALMAMA'S PLACE!!! , you coming?”
Michael: “We wouldn’t miss it for the world! Tiller though isn’t very talkative at the moment, she’s still recovering….”
Tiller:
Trav: “Hey! Can I try that out?”
Michael, Sorceror & Tiller: “NO!”
Michael: “You gents look good in my cloths…Black suits, white shirts, black fedoras, thin black ties, cheap sunglasses.”
Trav: “Much more comfortable than the school girl outfit HE gave me… that sadist!”
Sorce: “We’re on a mission from god!”
Michael: “Heheheh! Jake and Elwood Blues! All you need now is a blues-mobile.”
Sorce: “On our way to SanDiego now to see valdrane78 about that.”
Michael: “Nice! Well, we wish you luck in your escape and if there’s anything we can do for you in the meanwhile, call us and we shall deliver! I owe you one now, Sorce.”
Sorce: “The pleasure was ours, bro!”
Trav: “Yeah, it was fun!”
Tiller: “Are you all going to blow each other now?”
Michael, Trav & Sorce: “NO!!!!”

Don’t touch that dial! Stay tuned for more thrills chills and excitement!
To be continued…..


...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


willing2tryit42 40M
1141 posts
3/28/2006 4:12 pm

This is going to be one of the greatest epics ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


micahbiguns 51M

3/28/2006 4:19 pm

Dammitt maybe I should of fed them two worthless dawgs rickun rackin snarl mother turd spew and filth. Alright you bastards you better not put one scratch on my baby ya here!!Or you gonna wish the dogs had of eaten you! Also only feed her super unleaded fuel she will treat you better and one other thing do not exceed 5800 rpm's she aint even broke in yet. Boy she sure runs sweet huh!


Sorceror07 54M

3/28/2006 4:38 pm

    Quoting willing2tryit42:
    This is going to be one of the greatest epics ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but wait! there's more!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


rm_metalmama69 42F
3878 posts
3/28/2006 4:41 pm

This is very amusing, thank You Master!


Sorceror07 54M

3/28/2006 4:42 pm

    Quoting micahbiguns:
    Dammitt maybe I should of fed them two worthless dawgs rickun rackin snarl mother turd spew and filth. Alright you bastards you better not put one scratch on my baby ya here!!Or you gonna wish the dogs had of eaten you! Also only feed her super unleaded fuel she will treat you better and one other thing do not exceed 5800 rpm's she aint even broke in yet. Boy she sure runs sweet huh!
yeah, best ground up restore i've ever stolen too! ...er...borrowed hehe! don't worry, i'll treat her right and after i'm done breaking her in, you'll love the way she opens up wide too

i won't let trav drive it though! ...he's liable to TAG something with it!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


micahbiguns 51M

3/28/2006 5:25 pm

I have demanded an APB be issued for my baby

See I have been violated for more details


Sorceror07 54M

3/28/2006 6:31 pm

you're welcome my pet

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


Sorceror07 54M

3/28/2006 6:33 pm

as long as things remain cool out there on the road... i don't see a problem having it returned asap and in it's pristine condition... but if the cops show up, all bets are off lol! opps! sorry

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


tillerbabe 56F

3/29/2006 12:07 am

Perfect ending...for me.


libgemOH 56M/52F

3/29/2006 5:56 am

Whew! Glad you guys escaped! Was worried for a minute out there with all the guts and gore!

Back on the edge of my seat! -B

(Hey Tiller, think I can take a look at that new toy of yours???)


rm_cru1972 44M
4407 posts
3/29/2006 11:03 am

I have Updated the A.P.B. just letting you know I am winning over the hearts of the pure here. MUAHhahahahahaha.


Sorceror07 54M

3/29/2006 12:06 pm



...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


Sorceror07 54M

3/29/2006 12:07 pm

    Quoting libgemOH:
    Whew! Glad you guys escaped! Was worried for a minute out there with all the guts and gore!

    Back on the edge of my seat! -B

    (Hey Tiller, think I can take a look at that new toy of yours???)
thanks, we're glad too lol! don't ask me where all the guts and gore came from though... guess i couldn't have worked that out better if i'd have planed it!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


Sorceror07 54M

3/29/2006 12:56 pm

    Quoting rm_cru1972:
    I have Updated the A.P.B. just letting you know I am winning over the hearts of the pure here. MUAHhahahahahaha.
thank... you're a real pal lol!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


TTigerAtty 62M

3/29/2006 2:27 pm

Ring***Ring***Ring***Ring

TTiger: "Sorc, is this you? TTiger here! You guys OK?"
Sorc: "Ya, we made it outta there, but just barely! Crawled over to a barn and found this hopped-up red GTO! Wadda machine, man!"
TTiger: "Well, didn't you fuckers see me there in that Hummer?"
Sorc: "Fuck no, man! You were there?"
TTiger: "Yes! I came to help out! The smoke and debris was so damned thick after you got hit, I kinda got disoriented! I hollered out for you two guys and a couple guys got into the back seat of that Hummer, so I assumed it was you two."
Sorc: "Oh yah? Wasn't us man! So, who the fuck was it?"
TTiger: "That's the fuckin' problem, you idiot! It was a couple guys from fantasylover_05's posse!"
Sorc: "Oh shit!"
TTiger: "Oh shit is right! I'm locked up here in Missouri right now, and fantasylover_05 is attempting to extradite me to face arraignment on charges of aiding and abetting you fuckers!"
Sorc: "Sorry to hear than man!"
TTiger: "Well, I'm not too damned thrilled about it either! So, now, you guys are runnin' free and your lead attorney is locked up! How da ya like them apples?"
Sorc: "Not good! Not good!"
TTiger: "Here's what we're gonna do, Sorc. phoenix_law is taking over as lead attorney and will manage the team of attorneys we have assembled. Phoenix was gonna take a big role in preparing your defense against the more serious charges with GerrySpence anyway. This can still work! No need to panic!"
Sorc: "Well, that's good, but Trav and I don't plan on being taken alive anyway!"
TTiger: "Well, just in case you fuck up and things don't go exactly the way you and Trav 'plan', we'll have your legal defense prepared."
Sorc: "So, what about you, TTiger?"
TTiger: "Well, I'm now relying on Phoenix for my own damned legal defense. Shit! I'll probably get disbarred and go to prison if he can't pull a rabbit out of his brief case!"
Sorc: "Good luck, man! I'll tell Trav. He's pukin' up some Twinkies right now. Hard to hold them Twinkies down with my drivin'!"
TTiger: "Gotta get off now! The local sheriff's deputy is giving me the evil eye! Try to stay out of trouble!"
TTiger: "Oh, and if you got any connections to get some Mccallan scotch brought in here somehow, I'd appreciate it!"


Sorceror07 54M

3/29/2006 4:36 pm

    Quoting TTigerAtty:
    Ring***Ring***Ring***Ring

    TTiger: "Sorc, is this you? TTiger here! You guys OK?"
    Sorc: "Ya, we made it outta there, but just barely! Crawled over to a barn and found this hopped-up red GTO! Wadda machine, man!"
    TTiger: "Well, didn't you fuckers see me there in that Hummer?"
    Sorc: "Fuck no, man! You were there?"
    TTiger: "Yes! I came to help out! The smoke and debris was so damned thick after you got hit, I kinda got disoriented! I hollered out for you two guys and a couple guys got into the back seat of that Hummer, so I assumed it was you two."
    Sorc: "Oh yah? Wasn't us man! So, who the fuck was it?"
    TTiger: "That's the fuckin' problem, you idiot! It was a couple guys from fantasylover_05's posse!"
    Sorc: "Oh shit!"
    TTiger: "Oh shit is right! I'm locked up here in Missouri right now, and fantasylover_05 is attempting to extradite me to face arraignment on charges of aiding and abetting you fuckers!"
    Sorc: "Sorry to hear than man!"
    TTiger: "Well, I'm not too damned thrilled about it either! So, now, you guys are runnin' free and your lead attorney is locked up! How da ya like them apples?"
    Sorc: "Not good! Not good!"
    TTiger: "Here's what we're gonna do, Sorc. phoenix_law is taking over as lead attorney and will manage the team of attorneys we have assembled. Phoenix was gonna take a big role in preparing your defense against the more serious charges with GerrySpence anyway. This can still work! No need to panic!"
    Sorc: "Well, that's good, but Trav and I don't plan on being taken alive anyway!"
    TTiger: "Well, just in case you fuck up and things don't go exactly the way you and Trav 'plan', we'll have your legal defense prepared."
    Sorc: "So, what about you, TTiger?"
    TTiger: "Well, I'm now relying on Phoenix for my own damned legal defense. Shit! I'll probably get disbarred and go to prison if he can't pull a rabbit out of his brief case!"
    Sorc: "Good luck, man! I'll tell Trav. He's pukin' up some Twinkies right now. Hard to hold them Twinkies down with my drivin'!"
    TTiger: "Gotta get off now! The local sheriff's deputy is giving me the evil eye! Try to stay out of trouble!"
    TTiger: "Oh, and if you got any connections to get some Mccallan scotch brought in here somehow, I'd appreciate it!"
*click* damn!

Trav: "what?"
Sorce: "Tiger got busted."
Trav: "WHHHHHHH! *chokes on a twinkie* !!!!!!!"
Sorce: "We have a detour after sandiego..."
Trav: "ohhhhnooooo!"

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


Sorceror07 54M

4/10/2006 10:08 am

    Quoting sparkee58:
    i feel like i just read "War and Peace" on mushrooms.
imagine WRITING it on shrooms now heheh!

...That which does not kill me merely pisses me off!...


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