4 AM  

Sophistic8edCT2 47F
19 posts
8/21/2005 10:16 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

4 AM


Spent all of last night talking to Don. By the time we hung up it was 4am east coast time. I am completely into him as I informed him last night. We both plan to meet and allow a long term relationship to develop.

I swear, I haven't felt like this about anyone in so long. The intensity and speed at which this is moving is incredible. While I guess I should be somewhat hesitant, I feel so comfortable with Don. He is an amzing man and I am so falling in love with him. The only thing that scares me about it is knowing that we will never be completely together. But maybe it is better that way. What I mean is that maybe it is easier to keep a spark alive if you are not bothered with the monotony of daily life that marriage can bring.

Sometimes the comforts of marriage can lead you away from your ideal romantic or sexual desires. It seems to have happened with Don and his wife as they are more like friends than lovers. I guess friendship is not so bad though. Better to stay in a marriage with your friend than to stay in one with someone you fight with all the time. So many couples seem to think that is healty these days. Friendship is a big part of marriage I think.

Kevin returned home early from his trip and was bogged down with "business" once arriving home. A quickie in the bedroom (we have guests for 2 weeks)and then back to wheeling and dealing for him. It made me think though... Don's marriage has the essential friendship part, but is missing the sexual element. My marriage is not lacking sex by any means, but that being said... is the friendship element really in place like it should be? I am beginning to wonder.

I get romanced and seduced on a regular basis when Kevin is home, but it is always aimed at sex. Afterward there seem to be emotional connections missing. I mean I didn't really have much of a say about moving to the east coast.. Just sort of told it would happen. Not allowed to work because it will make him look like a bad provider... ridiculous. He is a great guy, but I think he is losing sight of what is important. And I am not OK with that... is that wrong???

csango39 49M

1/9/2006 2:07 pm

You sound right on. Kevin sounds like a typicaly FFC Wall Streeter or other financial guy. The balance between friend and lover is a tough one. The chauvanist provider thing is so 1950-60.


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