Business Contracts  

SmartType 51F
560 posts
7/12/2006 5:17 pm

Last Read:
4/4/2009 5:37 pm

Business Contracts

I keep coming across all these sad sack sort of stories of people who end up in these sexless marriages. Although I am a hopeless romantic and believe in true love and love at first sight sort of rot, I think that when it comes to marriage people need to get certain things ironed out if they are stepping down the aisle. For both parties! It's totally unpredictable to know how you'll grow mentally as life brings on it's challenges, but some of the material/physical things ought to remain constant. Like weight and sexual appetite. Seriously - I have seen it on both sides. When a partner completely let's their body go to hell. 10-15 lbs is cool, a little more to hug and tug on, but more than that, a person needs to take a hard look in the mirror and put the ice cream back into the freezer. And sex! So at what point (OK - must admit here that the complaint is mostly regarding the fairer sex) do people lose their creativity and drive? Is it on the way up the aisle? As the ring is gently pushed on the finger? Or when the first bit of wedding cake is eaten? Gents, my recommendation to you - within your pre-nup, have it clearly spelled out that oral sex is expected for 50% of all sexual encounters. And that morning sex is expected at least three times a week. Granny panties are to be worn only when not in the same state as each other and keeping a zero balance on the credit card is a must. But guys, in all fairness, you need to keep the romance factor high, know when to hug and caress and coddle as well as being able to fuck a gal senseless when all else fails.

But that being said, I am the one whose idea of a lasting relationship barely gets beyond two months. So who am I to advise?

49AK 55M
1823 posts
7/12/2006 6:25 pm

Living through it and relationships as an abstaction are not even close to the same animal!

Getting to a sexless marriage is like falling off a horse. Having a great sex life while married is like winning the Dressage at the olympics. Takes dedication and years of hard work.

Enough horse metaphors for one day.

SmartType replies on 7/12/2006 8:48 pm:
Hi Alaska (my favorite state),
well a horse is horse of course of course. I'll leave all of the Mr. Ed and Catherine the great innunendos out of this!


rm_mk1867 58M
60 posts
7/12/2006 6:34 pm

Ah, many of the sad sack stories are true. Its called life. A lot of things change after you go down the aisle. Don't say "but guys", its not always the "guys" fault. Divorce in this country, latest statistics, is at 50%. Blame who ever you feel comfortable blaming.

your quote "but some of the material/physical things ought to remain constant. Like weight and sexual appetite". That doesn't happen!

your quote "within your pre-nup, have it clearly spelled out that oral sex is expected for 50% of all sexual encounters. And that morning sex is expected at least three times a week."
Pre-nup? oral sex and morning sex expected? no comment, everybody can judge for themselves.

your quote "fuck a gal senseless when all else fails." yes if she wants sex or do you suggest ?

I'm trying to give a friendly critique here but I have to ask "what planet are you from"

Your Friend Mark

SmartType replies on 7/12/2006 8:45 pm:
Hi Mark. I from the planet called GET A SENSE OF FUCKING HUMOUR!

qosmann 66M

7/12/2006 6:34 pm

Such contracts might seem like a good idea, but all that recordkeeping...

Saturday (or Sunday, or Friday, or whatever day, depending on your contract) Oh honey, you own me two sessions of oral sex and one more morning session.

Contract also implies penalty for failure to meet terms. Who enforces? How is it enforcible?

Marriage is tough enough. Add a contract like this and you have a recipe for disaster, not to mention ridicule on all the talk shows

But what do I know. I'm just a man...

SmartType replies on 7/12/2006 8:52 pm:
See here is where the contract thing kicks in. 90 day cancellation clause if the other party does not perform.. and as far as penalty fees.. oh my, the sky is the limit and the more creative the better. So for every missed blow job, let's say a striptease AND a blowjob are in order. If that is missed, she has to do the lawn and take out the trash as added penalties.

ImpishWolf 36M
29 posts
7/13/2006 12:29 am

Well I’ve never been married, but it seems to me that people especially the young ones that haven’t had very much of life’s trials and yes I know I might qualify for that category, but only if you didn’t know me or my history. Have these unrealistic ideas of love and marriage and all those things, probably comes form to much TV and movies, pop culture and all. No don’t get me wrong I’m a hopeless romantic and all. But I think you have to have some realistic ideas of what to expect in relationships, the high passion and frequent sexual encounters isn’t naturally going to last through out the entire relationship. In fact naturally, the more mature intimate sexual and intimate time spent together is really supposed to replace the high passion in time. I’m not saying there shouldn’t be any passion only that maintaining it all the time is just unrealistic and to draining on both.

I Also believe people forget that love, passion and marriage all need to be worked on at all times, and becoming complacent is really what kills those feelings and ruins marriages. You have to think of it as a fire and like all fires, it needs attention and a little fanning to keep going if you are not careful the fire will go out and then things just won’t be the same. Seems people think that once you are married you don’t have to work at it any more, you don’t have to stay attractive to your partner or keep doing the things that they like. But they would be wrong you need to try a little harder to keep the fire going.

Though having it all in a pre-nup seems like an interesting idea, just wonder if that would kill on of the prime ingredients in passion, spontaneity? But I’ve actually heard of it done before don’t know if it worked though.

But then if it wasn’t for all the unhappily married women out there…. Well I’ll leave it at that.

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