RULES MEN LIVE BY !!!!!  

Simpleman324u 42M
27 posts
5/8/2006 8:07 pm

Last Read:
12/6/2006 7:00 pm

RULES MEN LIVE BY !!!!!


We always hear "the rules "
From the female side.
Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!
1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.


1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible , Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

_Bound4Pleasure 50F
204 posts
5/9/2006 9:24 am

Just in case you guys dont understand us, I figured i would post some translations for you!
What women really mean
I heard a noise - I noticed you were almost asleep
You Want - You Want
We Need - I Want
It's your decision - The correct decision should be obvious by now
Do what you want - You'll pay for this later
We need to talk - I need to complain
Sure...go ahead - I don't want you to
You're certainly attentive tonight - Is sex all you ever think about?
I'm not emotional! - I'm not having a period
This kitchen is so inconvenient - I want a new house...and curtains and carpeting, furniture...
Hang the picture there - No, I mean hang it there!
Do you love me? - I'm going to ask for something expensive
I'll be ready in a minute - Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.
You have to learn to communicate - Just agree with me.
Are you listening to me!? - Too late, your a goner
I'm sorry - You'll be sorry.
No - Yes
Maybe - No
Do you like this recipe? - It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it
I'm not yelling! - Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.


rm_New2FLCouple 40M/41F

7/3/2006 10:12 am

You haven't updated this in awhile


Simpleman324u 42M

7/31/2006 8:32 pm

I know I know. I gotta have something to chat about ,
before I update. Im in a writers block I think.


rm_New2FLCouple 40M/41F

8/4/2006 6:15 pm

good to see you..


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