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"The Mean Reds"
"The Mean Reds"
Today I am definitely a rat on a wheel. Little accomplishment, actually too little to even mention. My depression is kicking in today with the impending holiday, deadlines, and moving. I'm usually so syked for Christmas, I do a lot of volunteering, gift giving, and I'm generally nicer all around. This year is the first year that I could careless, and that makes me no fun to be around.
Today my boss and I generally just pissed each other off. I think that it is a good thing that I work for a man. Men know when to let things cool down and try to resolve things later. The other reason we leave each other alone on days like this is because we can't function without one another. It would be a very bad day for him if I stopped working for him. He knows it and I know it. Now if one day he decided not to practice law anymore I would be the one having a bad day. I can't work for another attorney but him. I'm paid more then well, treated better then most (which is more important) and generally left to my own devices. My dream work scenario, with paid discretionary bonuses. Yet, I'm still in a lousy mood.
I wish it was January already. A clean slate, a new beginning. Instead I'm stuck here in my little dark shell for a little while longer. It's enough to make me pick up my phone and call my local travel agent and scream into the phone... "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! I'LL GO ANYWHERE, HERE'S MY AMEX CARD!" My mood is best described by Audrey Hepburn when she played Ms. Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's when she said that she was suffering from the "Mean Reds"
Tomorrow will be better, I know it. Until tomorrow....
12/18/2005 4:45 pm
Hope your tomorrow was better.|
S'io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s'i'odo il vero,
Senza tema d'infamia ti rispondo.