|Blogs > SigEp4U > Well do you want a good laugh?|
Don’t read this… it’s not going to be pretty and you’re definitely not going to get a laugh out of this… unless your laughing at me.
Anyway… why is it that sex has so much power over us?
Sex can make us feel loved, special, appreciated, sexy, beautiful, and the list goes on and on. That’s the good list and then there is the bad list. The bad list includes jealousy, envy, anger, etc., etc.
As you can probably guess by now ANGER definitely comes to mind when I think about my wife and her lover. Some of you who are reading this have open marriages and that is fine… but I am not built like that… and that means… this fucking sucks.
Ok… so if I am that angry why am I sticking around? I don’t think I can even answer that myself. It’s not because I am afraid to be alone… there are two many other fish in the sea to worry about that. I guess the main reason is that because I am not mad all of the time… only under certain circumstances. Only when I allow myself to dwell on the affair.
Last night was like that… couldn’t get it out of my mind… I spent two hours driving around in a fucking snow storm so I didn’t have to sit around the house and just think about this shit.
So what ticks me off so much… well my thoughts go something like this… this is where it gets ugly!
You fucking bitch… I didn’t do this… but I am the one that is fucking suffering.
You don’t give a damn about my feelings… you want this to remain out of site out of mind… so I have to hold it all inside. Well you know something that’s going to change real soon… if you leave, you leave… fuck it.
All you think about is yourself… you didn’t think about how this would affect me or how it would affect our son.
Maybe since you don’t care about my needs I should start looking out for myself… I ought to go out and just fuck anything that even gives me the time of day… AND… one thing is for damn sure… I am going to do it just like you did… I’m going to bring the lady right here into our home, introduce her to you… and then take her in the bedroom as soon as you leave and get it on.
Fucking Bitch… you cold hearted bitch…. Don’t think I have forgotten about your lover either… I ought to cut his balls off and give them to you as a present.
OK SNAP BACK TO REALITY… yes these thoughts go through my mind… but I don’t act upon them. Not because my wife doesn’t deserve (maybe deserve is the wrong word because no one deserves this) any of that… but because I wouldn’t use another lady in that manner.
It’s just not in me… anyway… now that I got that off my chest I will make a good effort to not do this again... don't want this to turn into a poor-pity-me sorta thing. Really all things considered I'm doing just fine.
On a brighter side of things… it is still snowing and it’s beautiful!
I will probably write some more later on today… it’s going to be a slow day here at work.
2/24/2005 9:44 am
Hey! welcome to the club.|
IT's ok to use this site to get back at her, as long as the new mate is all aware of your situation.
2/24/2005 1:40 pm
I don't have any plans to use this site to get back at her... If and when I start looking for a new lady... it will be when I am free and unattached.|
Just using the site to meet some new people and to hopefully make a couple of friends in the process.