Lordy Have Mercy  

SexyRycheBabe 45F
1292 posts
6/15/2006 11:04 am

Last Read:
6/19/2006 10:31 am

Lordy Have Mercy

I checked out my email inbox today... something I do on occasion and was greeted with the following message in relation to my First A.F.F. hookup:

hey i was reading my fiance ______'s emails earlier and he said it wouldn't be a problem to write you... i am in no way trying to harass you or make you feel uncomfortable, i just thought maybe ______ had left out some of the details on who he really is for you... _____ and i have been together 6 years, he has cheated on me despite going to swingers clubs together, had a baby with his mistress behind my back, and just led double life after double life... if you want to do that with him, that is your choice as a woman and as an adult, but i just wanted to let you know he has another life and you seem like a sweet lady just wanting some love. he has 4 children from 4 different women, im telling you that because its something i thought was important that he didn't tell me for over two years into our relationship and his family certainly didn't share this information either. ______ also has a long history of domestic violence because when his lies are found out, he finds that he can use his size and strength to hurt people into believing his lies... I know for fact when i had to file for a protective order that his 4th baby mama had also filed for one at the same time. i made an ad because i saw that he had secretly made one again and he tried to black mail that he was going to ruin my career with it... anyway, thats just some of whats really up.. if you want to delete this cool, if you want to send it to him, I don't keep secrets... I wish you the best in your search for love!



Now, I haven't actually seen this guy since like November, maybe. We've emailed a few times since about getting together again but our schedules have never quite worked out and, truthfully, I always took that as a sign that we weren't really that into each other, anyway. Right? So, this is what I send to her in response:

Thank you for the information. You don't have to be concerned about me, though. I wouldn't even consider myself having had a relationship with _______ much less having one now. Certainly strong emotions like love never played a part in any of it. We only got together a couple of times to have sex and that's it.
I may seem like a sweet girl but I am definitely not a stupid one. I always knew there was a little something off/more there (as in things didn't add up and things I didn't know) and quite frankly, I didn't care enough to know. If that makes any sense. Plus, ______ was never a potential partner for me because he was never my type of man, if you can understand that.

The fact that he willingly allowed you to email me shows that he didn't care that I found all of this out. I don't mean any more to him than he does to me. We had a fling and while we've emailed regarding doing it again, we never have followed through with it.

I'm very sorry for the pain and suffering he's caused you but please understand that your interactions with him have absolutely nothing in common with mine.

I won't be forwarding your or my emails to him. All he would do is deny it, say you're crazy, etc... and again, I don't care about any of it. I don't need the drama.

Good luck to you.

My thoughts immediately reading the email was that this is a ticking time bomb and I'm getting the hell out of the way. I mean, seriously! I get this NOW?!?!?!!!! I SSSSSOOOOOOOOOOO don't care about this. Or him. Especially him. When I read her email and saw his name, I had to stop and think about it for a second to make the connection. (I know that sounds terrible but I'm using that as an example as to how far removed from this guy I am.) Now, I'm wondering if maybe it's a hoax, she's nuts, he's doing it on purpose, etc... The thing I keep coming back to now is why on earth would she call him her fiance when she's trying to make the point of what a big loser he is?! What I didn't tell her is that in our very first interaction with each other, he made a phone call home to check on his son (the one I did know about!) and he talked to him in such an ugly manner that I knew it would never get anywhere because there was no way in hell he was ever going to be around my son. Sometimes my instincts are spot-on. I need to remember to always listen to them and honor them.

What do you think?
What would you do if you received such an email about someone you'd met with?
Would you put any stock in it or ignore it completely?
Was my reply eloquent but firmly stating my position at the same time?

docdirk 47M

6/15/2006 5:54 pm

I'd vote for no more interaction of any kind in this drama. In fact, I'd start apartment hunting in Canada!

Ah, Its you again, Your Angel Feathers and your Blood Stains...

SexyRycheBabe 45F
820 posts
6/15/2006 6:46 pm

Doc: You want me apartment hunting in Canada? Why not CT instead?!?!

So far no reply to my email. Maybe she said what she wanted and that's it. Who knows?!

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