Rdy2doit 52M
1532 posts
6/2/2006 3:18 pm

Men are like fine wine: They all start out as grapes, and it is your job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd want to have with dinner.

Men are like computers: Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

Men are like coolers: Load them with beer, and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, and keep you up all night long.

Men are like horoscopes: They always tell you what to do, and they are always wrong.

Men are like plungers: They spend most of their time in the hardware store or the bathroom.

Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?
When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.

Why are men like commercials?
You can't believe a word they say.

Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

How is a man like the weather?
Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

How many men does it take to open a can of beer?
None, it should be open when she brings it to him.

Why are guys like lava lamps?
They're fun to watch, but not very bright!

What have you done wrong if your wife walks into the living room and slaps you.
You have left the chain to long.

If your dog was barking at the back door and your wife was knocking on the front door, who would you let in first?
The dog, because at least he would shut up once he was in.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
So they can stand closer to the stove.

lightswitch1963 68M/53F

6/2/2006 4:49 pm

These are hilarious!where do you find them?

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