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Emotional Hang Ups
Emotional Hang Ups
(Sigh) Today sucked the life right out of me. I worked, and had to put up with C's mouth all day. I swear, I really just want to beat the life out of her somedays. I wonder if I could get away... Nevermind.
So then I went to M's for dinner, and while it was nice, I could totally tell M wasn't feeling the whole me and him thing. We went to Panera Bread and saw Meggers with some dude. I would have asked questions, but I thought it more fun to throw balled up napkins at their table. M bowed out early, citing tiredness as the culprit. I think he was just avoiding beating a dead horse. I suppose I should love him for it. Alas, I'm slighly bitter. How can you NOT want me?
Which brings me to the REAL reason for this post. A came over tonight, and I gave what I consider to be one of my top ten bjs ever. I really like A, so I'm inclinded to dislocate my jaw and supress the gag reflex to make him happy. A is all the things I look for in a guy. He's smart, he's cute, he makes me laugh, and he has one hell of a package. We've only had sex once, but it was pretty awesome (despite the fact that it was short and sweet, it was awesome,none the less) A's still hung up over his ex, and he's slept with her since the last time he was with me. I'm so completely jealous. I dont know what to make of A. It's like, we go weeks without talking, and then one of us will IM the other one and we wind up fooling around for an hour or two. He's not exactly a selfish lover, either. I think he'd plugg along til I came if he could. He has made me cum once, but it was the first night we hooked up. He's a little bit of a geek, too, which I really love, because it means we have something besides sex in common. I know that I'm probably not A's type when it comes to dating, but I know that I would do my Damnedest to keep him sexually satisfied. I try to play it all off like I'm cool with this casualness, but I think I'm pretty transparent. Either way, I doubt that this is healthy.
I dont know, some days I think that maybe I should wash my hands of the male persausion and just concentrate on the music. Alas, I cannot, for I love penis.
Current Song: Liz Phair "Why Can't I?"
Currently Wearing: A white cotten T and lavender cotten panties