The AFF ruler!  

Queen_Of_Wands 45F
228 posts
5/22/2006 11:31 am

Last Read:
5/23/2006 11:57 am

The AFF ruler!

I found this simple guide to the eternal question:

First, take the penis and begin stroking it gently until it becomes fully hard. Once you have achieved full hardness, take the ruler in one hand, and place the end marked "0" (or the end with the lowest number) against the point where the top of your penis makes a conjunction with your torso. Do not press the ruler into your torso. Simply lay it gently along the top of your penis. Using a pencil, carefully mark on the ruler where the tip of your penis (that's the part that goes in first) lines up with the fractional INCH markings on the ruler. Count to the nearest ΒΌ", and then write this measurement down on the piece of paper. If your penis curves in any direction, it would be advisable to use a tape measure instead of a ruler so it may easily follow the curve of your penis and give you a more accurate measure.

So there you have it, guys.

Putting a Spirit of Ecstasy on a Skoda won't make it a Rolls Royce.

haversack_smith 40M
6192 posts
5/22/2006 1:26 pm

You mean, you're not supposed to shove the first inch of the tape measure up your arse and measure from there?

I've been doing it wrong all these years...

Queen_Of_Wands 45F

5/22/2006 2:03 pm

That's not a toothbrush at all is it, bumbag? It's a digital ruler!

haversack_smith 40M
6192 posts
5/22/2006 3:08 pm

I don't need a digital ruler, I need a microscope.

Queen_Of_Wands 45F

5/22/2006 8:12 pm

Looks like you're using a periscope instead

Djeeper1987 47M

5/23/2006 7:51 am

I have always known that.

Carpe Diem

Lovethegoddess 56M

5/23/2006 11:08 am

I usually side with the ladies when responding to blog articles but on this occasion I think I'll balance things out a little. We guys all know what an endless source of amusement the size of a guys bits and pieces are to women, who are well known to play on this and take full advantage in perpetuating a situation that doesn't give the average guy much self confidence. But that's the plan isn't it girls, and it's so much fun for you at our expense. However, for those who know, and for those who don't know, the phallus is just an elongated clitoris at the end of the day. Our bollocks are merely ovaries that have dropped, and we also have breasts. The case for man is a very slim one. Everything is ultimately female. Show me something that didn't come out of a vagina of one sort or another, and you'll have found an enigma. But don't despair guys we do have a purpose, or we wouldn't have been created in the first place.So no matter how small a male 'clitoris' may be, it will always be far larger than a female one. You really will need a small ruler to measure them. So don't gloat and chortle too loudly girls, if woman was so perfect there wouldn't be a need for men. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

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