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BDSM: Fantasy or Obsession (Part II)
BDSM: Fantasy or Obsession (Part II)
Well... getting back to my wonderful lady and partner in life. From what I can tell she is a hot little number on alt.com. She writes as Lady Koros in case you’re interested. Sometimes ladies on this site would prefer to communicate with her directly. So I often refer them to her on alt.com.
She recently allowed me the privilege of seeing some of her messages. I can certainly tell from the many emails she gets, that she’s going to find exactly what she wants on that site. Boy... some day soon, some guy or gal is really going to get a good spanking and a serious strap-on pounding from a very cute and erotic girl.
She and I have our own dynamic relationship. But on alt.com.she is trully a dominatrix in the making. It’s incredibly exciting.
Funny... I have been buying her strap-ons and an assortment of kinky tools thinking she’d help me take care of all the bi-curious women that I thought would come our way. Despite the stated fantasies of many women on this site who say they are looking for a couple, it seems that many are not actually able to follow through on their desires. Of course it’s true, a good fantasy doesn’t necessarily have to be acted upon. But after reading a few blogs on the subject it appears something a little more interesting is going on. (See blogs entitled, “Young Women on This Site Lack Civility” and the corresponding responses).
In our case, our risqué profile probably scares some ladies away. What kind of woman is going to come our way when they find out how kinky we are?? And there are so many other variables involved with selecting a sexual partner–weight, height, race, age, physique, hair-color, lipstick, shoe size, whatever.
Although our profile is a bit of a fantasy there is a lot of insight there. Our alter egos are involved which is an important part of the true individual. After all aren’t fantasies the projection of our inner being, the subconscious mind and all that? Who cares if we don’t have a clue where all of this crazy, sexual stuff is coming from?
It’s exciting as hell just to let these energies go. You are projecting another part of your sexual identity by sharing and expressing your fantasies. So, in a very meaningful way, it IS you. Additionally, the rest of us can get off just from reading your incredible statements(and of course viewing your sexy, erotic pictures).
Actually, I am a pretty ordinary guy who happens to have an extraordinary love for romance, seduction, and creating erotic scenes. I guess that’s a nice way of saying I love to fuck. But, you can’t say something like this to a woman and expect her to jump into bed with you. You have to be patient, suave, and mysterious. Right? My worse nightmare was dating a renowned psychic a few years back. She knew my every thought. I felt like I was walking around with no clothes on, trying to hide my hard-on. And still, despite my sordid, nasty thoughts, she liked me. Or, maybe it was my hard-on she liked, or my nasty thoughts. I really didn’t know what to think.
But I digress... A woman or cute T-girl would do well to come our way. There would be so much sexual energy, intimacy, and of course, good sex for her.
But getting to know you would be the biggest thrill because we would delay the pleasure of servicing you–like any good lover should do. But not as a hurtful game, it would be part of the pleasure of earning your trust and learning all about your deep, hidden fantasies.
A BDSM relationship requires sensitivity, trust, care, and concern. It’s not some sort of masochistic or sadistic free-for-all. There are genuine and often deeply rooted emotions involved that must be respected. These emotions are often tied to hidden desires and fantasies that are closely guarded and protected. Feelings of guilt and shame are very common when dealing with concealed, latent, unfulfilled desires. So the idea of a caring, loving dominatrix is not a ridiculous, far-fetched idea. It is a requirement.
And besides, how does one let on that they want to be spanked, or tied-up, or whipped into submission if the other person isn’t respectful of your fantasy? How many women out there have fantasies? Which, by the way, certainly does not mean you actually want to be rapped? They’re just deeply held and often forbidden thoughts–the origins of which are sometimes a mystery. We all know that sexual fantasies are incredibly complex, and even if we don’t know why we are having them, we all seem to know when they’re happening. And we know that serious problems can occur when you can’t separate fantasy from reality.
For most of us, however, we keep silent about our desires and have difficulty sharing them with our lovers unless, of course, you are extremely advanced in your own sexual understanding (which few of us are), or...until the right, delightful, person comes along who has the nerve, and hopefully the experience and skill, to demand that your secret desires be unveiled and expressed.
When the right combination of personalities and fantasies are involved, and the untapped reservoir of intense emotions is released, it’s no wonder why there is an explosion of sexual energy. It also explains why after just one mind-blowing experience the activity that turned you on becomes an obsession–something that consumes you. At this point, the fantasy becomes real, and because it was resisted and kept as a dark secret, the experience that brought you such intense pleasure now becomes your obsession. “You just gotta have it.” Kind of like your first orgasm, or eating some sweet girl’s pussy for the first time. Or having a mouthful of a man’s hard...well, you get the idea. The point is, you knew immediately that you were going to try and repeat that wonderful, special feeling.
To change the subject a little bit, you’re probably wondering how a nice guy like me finally let go to release the drive to become a loving dominant. Well... that's a tale for my next blog.