|Blogs > Philosophy_N_Sex > Spewing Drivel|
Choose your own SEX ADVENTURE!!!!!
Choose your own SEX ADVENTURE!!!!!
Song of the day: Afternoon Delight-Starland Vocal Band
Welcome to choose you own sex adventure, where you choose the outcome of the story.
INTRO: As you read the first paragraph, you will be offered a choice of action. Each choice will have a paragraph number corresponding with the choice.
Example: after reading a paragraph you are given the choice turn right or left, to turn right goto 5 to turn left goto 10, if you choose to turn left you would then read paragraph 10, and make another choice, read that number so on and so on. Start with paragraph #1 but don’t read the paragraphs in order or this will make no sense at all, not that it will anyways hahaah. We tried to write this for all genders and preferences so all can enjoy it. Good luck and enjoy!
1-Your lover called and is waiting at home for a hot sexy afternoon delight. You only have 90 mins to get there, get to the action, and get back. You notice your bike is still attached to our car. The car would be faster if traffic is fine, however your bike is practically unstoppable to any traffic condition. With good weather, and no bad traffic reports what do you choose?
To drive goto 3
To take your bike goto 7
2-As you are riding along you notice a duffle bag full of money in the trash. You could really use some extra cash, there is nobody around, and coming home with a lot of money would really really turn your lover on! What will you do?
To take the money goto 12
To leave the money and ride on goto 6
3-Driving the car is faster, and after all you have driven this route a hundred times if not a thousand. As you drive you notice that in the back of a pick up truck is a lady on her knees, and a gorilla behind her having sex with her. No wait it is a guy in a gorilla suit doing the girl. They are attracting quite an audience. You are interested in the show, but have a show at home you can star in Do you follow the gorilla show or turn and head home a different way?
To follow the gorilla goto 5
To turn and take a different route home goto 8
4-The cheerleader was a 14 year old, and part of a sting to cut down on internet perverts. As you are doing hard time you find yourself in a cheerleader outfit. Big bubba the inmate leader says, "You are a naughty reform school girl, I need to spank that ass!" You get out of prison after 20 years with good behavior, but you are never the same again.
5-Oh yeah what a show, that gorilla is hung like a horse, and she is loud, sexy, and really loves it hard and fast. You reach down to touch yourself, and then crash, bang, pow, a major accident. You were not in good hands when they called the insurance company after the 15-car pile up results. You wake up from your coma 20 years later, with your name changed to Shivo. Thank you for playing.
6-You encounter an ice-cream truck as you travel along. Do your ears hang low is being played by those annoying PA systems at half normal speed. But some ice cream could be a nice treat for you and your lover, your lover's body as a sundae, sounds very tempting. Something about the ice cream driver seems odd however. The creepy guy asks ice cream? Do you buy some ice cream or not?
To buy ice cream goto 14
To pass on the ice cream goto 17
7-You are highly motivated to peddle fast, and you will be warmed up when you get to your waiting lover. You zoom along the bike trail, making good time. You then notice a sexy bike rider ahead of you. The hot rider is heading a way that will still take you to your house. Should you follow the sexy bike rider, and enjoy the view, or turn and focus your mind on your own lover?
To follow Goto 11
To turn goto 2
8-You hear crunching metal and police sirens in the direction of the gorilla couple. Whew you dodged one there. As you cruise along you see a hot sexy person fighting to change a tire. Well you can do your good deed for the day, and talk to a very sexy individual, or you can pass, knowing they will get help soon anyways. What will you do?
To stop and help goto 19
To pass on by goto 9
9-You were right, the very next car pulled over, and a someone obviously looking to get lucky steps out. No loss in not helping, you might have done a good deed because they might get lucky. Suddenly a cheerleader runs out and flags you down. As you stop she says, I am a naughty reform school girl, I need a spanking, will you spank me? Well her young ass is all firm and round, but this will delay your trip home. What will you do?
To spank that ass goto 4
To pass on that ass goto 6
10-Nothing will stop you, ou strike a ninja pose, and kick the bum in the bum. You stomp on his toe, poke his eye. Then out of the bushes a hot sexy ninja jumps out, and gives the bum the bum kicking of the century. As the bum runs away crying rubbing his bum, the sexy ninja offers you a quickie. Ninja looks very good in the outfit, and behind the mask are two sexy yet mysterious eyes. Could you handle two quickies in a row? Or should you pass on the ninja, and hope you don't get your butt kicked?
To do a quickie with the sexy ninja goto 16
To say no thanks and go home goto 6
11-You make a turn and end up in the middle of some damn parade. Nobody notices that you are not officially a part of the parade. You could just ride along pretending to throw candy to kids, and make it home in time. Well the parade does look short, waiting it out would be the polite thing to do.
To follow along as part of the parade goto 20
To wait until the parade passes goto 18
12-Oh No! it was a police drug sting, you get busted by the police. Your lover has to come pick you up at the police station. You are proven innocent, but no afternoon delight for you! You may try again when you are done crying.
13-You fight the good fight against the evil were wolf. You use silver coins to try and get him, but coins do not carry enough silver. You do everything you can, but even your Jedi powers are no match for the dark pup. You end up puppy chow after a bit. Too bad life insurance does not cover werewolf eating, or your lover would be very well off and could retire.
14-You buy some ice cream, and noticed that the ice cream man smiled with what looked like fangs, and had Alpo breath. Anyways, you rush home before the ice cream melts. Wow! Do you have the time of your life, nibbles, licks, sucks, fucks, and that was before the ice cream was fully eaten. You return to your normal life looking like smiling Bob the enzymatic guy, and his wife. Congrats!
15-Silly you cannot out run a werewolf! He leaps 20 feet, and gobbles you all gone, like the protein snack you are. The police are clueless and close the case, and your lover ends up with your ugly cousin.
16-You go for it in the trees safely behind the cover of the lush foliage. Oh yes the ninja feels soooo gooood! Damn! But then channel 7 pops out and gets your naked ass and worried face on camera. They are doing a special called "the menace of public sex and you" your co workers see it, your parents see it, your church people, your business clients, your boss, your lover, and even your ugly cousin all see your bare ass in motion and your face trying to duck. You find your stuff neatly packed at the front door of your house. You load up and move to Alaska to try and start a new life.
17-The ice cream man yells "what is my ice cream not good enough for you!" Then starts to change. He grows claws and fangs. Right in broad daylight to realize there is a full moon. The ice cream man is a werewolf, and he is pissed! You must decide if you should fight or if you should run.
To run goto 15
To fight goto 13
18-You decide to be good and let the parade pass, you go into the crowd, and great, now you are trapped in a mass of people and cars and stuff. The parade comes to a halt, trapping you further. Then over the loud speaker they announce, welcome to the first annual Kazoo playing festival. We have three hours of entertain for you today, we will begin with Herman playing his rendition of Me so Horny and Love is a Many Splendid thing. You endure two hours of this, then wake up in a straight jacket with nice men in white who are there to help you.
19-That hot sexy person gets hotter and sexier all the time. You can't help but burn with desire. When asked what you are headed home for, you find yourself blurting out all the details before you can stop yourself. Then you are asked if it is ok to go too, because you are so sexy and helpful how else can you be repaid? Would your lover mind sharing you just this one time?
To accept a take them home goto 21
To politely decline goto 6
20-You go along with the parade waving to people and smiling. When your street arrives you just turn and go your merry way. As you ride along a hobo vagrant bum jumps out and tries to steal your bicycle. He is smelly, icky, and has no teeth. You are pretty sure you can take him, but them he could be capable of anything. Do you fight or run?
To fight goto 10
To run goto 6
21-Your lover is surprised to see you have company. The flat tired person tells how helpful you were, and well the idea of coming along was too irresistible to pass up. So all agree and you have the most awesome, toe curling, soul flying, oh my God I love being alive threesome in the history of human kind. Congrats you win and win big!
6/20/2005 10:10 pm
You have WAAAYYY too much time on your hands. |
6/21/2005 7:38 am
Holly shit P&S, Where did all this come from. You're a depraved and perverse soul. Don’t ever change good buddy! |
Can't I just pass GO and collect my $200?
6/21/2005 10:28 am
Thank you for the nice comments. When a have some quiet time I just let my mind wander, and stuff pops into my head. Took a few days to make this work. |
I do actually work, really I do! Landed new clients even!
6/21/2005 8:19 pm
SUre you can collect your 200 dollars and pass go|
much better than going to jail