So, you want to be in the Lifestyle?  

Nightguy_1961 55M
3324 posts
4/5/2006 10:22 pm

Last Read:
5/1/2006 3:06 am

So, you want to be in the Lifestyle?

So, you want to be in the BDSM Lifestyle, my friend? You've seen all the pictures of women restrained, open for any and all types of pleasure and pain...and you want to come in and see what sights we have to offer.

Well, before you run off and spend a couple months paychecks on leather goods, dildos, paddles, canes, clamps...and the 'Bob Villa-Do-it-yourself spanking bench & planter' need to think about a few things.

Are you sure about yourself? Are you confident in your abilities as a Dominant? If not, are you willing to learn or ask for advice? Nobody knows everything.

Do you have a good and fertile imagination? Submissive woman want to be surprised with new experiences...If you can't come up with something new every now & then, you won't have a submissive long.

Are you comfortable communicating? Dominants aren't mind readers, nor can they send better be able to ask questions...and answer questions as well. Nobody likes someone who's a complete mystery.

Are you ready for the responsibility? Having a woman give you their submission is a great honor...and responsibility. She is placing her trust in you...are you ready for it?

Can you take someone telling you 'No'? With the large percentage of women in the world, the percentage of those women who are willing or able to do everything you want to do is microscopic. If a submissive says, "No, I don't want to do that"...can you stop without your feelings getting hurt?

Are you ready to give of yourself? Hard to believe, but if you 'play' with a submissive, to take her to erotic heights, you're going to have to give of yourself. Can you do that?

Are you ready, if your submissive wants it of you, to handle every thing in her life? If you tell your submissive, for instance, she's not to leave the house to go pay bills...somebody has to do it!!!

You see, there's a lot more to being in the BDSM Lifestyle than just buying a couple pairs of handcuffs and a crop. You must be imaginative, compassionate, understanding, caring, loving, giving, strong, confident, and responsible.

Are you ready for it? Are you? I wonder...

©Nightguy_1961 2006

LustGoddess2469 49F  
2453 posts
4/5/2006 11:20 pm

"You must be imaginative, compassionate, understanding, caring, loving, giving, strong, confident, and responsible."

Then YOU must be a wonderful Dom, my friend, because you are all of those things, and more.


Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/5/2006 11:27 pm:
Thank you, darlin'....I try....I really do!!!

MamChelle 48F  
1443 posts
4/5/2006 11:42 pm

Not many found here are even close to all those things...and the Ones that are are either oceans away or married. *grins* Those ready are few and far between, and those of us are surely hoping for Them to step up and notice..... *hugs and smiles* chelle.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:12 pm:
Some try...some fail...and some of us continue to learn. You never know....that One might just knock on your door soon.

Fox4aKnight1 43F

4/6/2006 1:46 am

I'll say more about this good post later ...not feeling so hot right now hugs

Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:12 pm:

I understand completely *hugs*

rm_DarkenMist 105F

4/6/2006 2:12 am

Very well said and expressed Nightguy.too many pretenders and players in the lifestyle. some that dont even have the basic concepts.wish You and Your lady well.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:13 pm:

Before One learns to run, One must learn to walk. Unfortunately, some are trying to run marathons before even learning to crawl.

rm_goddess1946 105F
13518 posts
4/6/2006 9:58 am

And one must....
have a great deal of love to give.
...and understand Intentions...
amoungst other things

No one can lead where they will not go and most
assuredly can not teach what they do not know...

Just my humble opinion

Just a little food for thought.............
If you really want to be happy, nobody can stop you...

Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:15 pm:

True....that point completely slipped my mind...see what happens when you work all night?

All I can do is share what I've learned...nothing more.

And btw....nothing about you should be 'humble'...imho

Whispersoftly5 52F
15176 posts
4/6/2006 12:43 pm

This is interesting reading to somebody like me with little exposure to this lifestyle (aside from porn site pictures and some writings). It almost seems as if couples in the BDSM lifestyle take relationships a bit more serious and dedicate much more energy - emotional and otherwise. I could be off - don't really know - but I like the level of commitment it appears is expended upon one another in order to sustain such a relationship. I guess no matter what type of relationship there are some who are committed and some who are not. So maybe it's not so different in that respect. Anyway, I'm sort of babbling - just good interesting reading. Thanks.


Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:18 pm:

It does appear that those of us in the lifestyle tend to take our relationships a little more serious than our non-lifestyle counterparts. No disrespect to them, mind you...I know many who are completely devoted to each other.

My lady & I were always in love with each other, but since we combined our experiences and decided to go for a 24/7 D/s relationship, we've grown closer, communicated better...and turn each other on even more.

You're not babbling, darlin'.....keep commenting and thank you *hugs*

wickedeasy 66F  
25407 posts
4/6/2006 2:07 pm

there's that no thing again - grins

well done - and a direct hit, again

You cannot conceive the many without the one.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 4/6/2006 9:19 pm:

Every now & then, I get a pitch across the plate I can swing at...this one came from the heart.

Become a member to create a blog