And I have to share a planet with these people?  

Nightguy_1961 55M
3324 posts
5/22/2006 12:12 am

Last Read:
5/24/2006 7:01 am

And I have to share a planet with these people?

My Grandfather used to have a question he'd ask people when they would say or do something really dumb.

"Did you slip and bump you head when you got up this morning?"

Working at a hotel for the past seven years has made me start to wonder if a good percentage of the world has slipped and bumped their heads. I have examples to prove this...

Example #1

The hotel has an outdoor pool that is prepped & open during the summer months. It is closed at 10pm every night to keep the noise down for the guests comfort. There is a big sign that says Pool area open from 7am - 10pm. There is a fence around the pool. There is a gate with a big padlock. Simple, right?

Many a night, I've had to chase people out of the pool after midnight or later. One night, around 1am, I see the water in the pool moving, so I go check. Three people from a wedding party were sitting out there partying, kicking and splashing in the pool. When I told them the pool area was closed, the reply was, "Oh, we didn't know it was closed."

The punch line? When I told them they had to leave, one of them asked me, "Could you open the gate? It's locked!" sheeeeeeeeesh!

Example #2

If we sell out every room in a night, I will put up a sign on the door and night window saying that we have no rooms available. (A lot of hotels don't have the old neon NO VACANCY signs today...wonder why?).

I first put out a printed sign that said NO VACANCY, but after I still had people come up and ask for rooms, I figured that, since the educational standards have really dropped, they didn't know what the word 'vacancy' meant.

I then would put out a sign that read NO ROOMS AVAILABLE; I still had people come up, look at the sign, and still ask "Do you got any rooms?"

I finally put out a two page computer generated sign that said in big bold block letters:


thinking that would solve the problem.

I still had eight people come up and ask, "Do you have any rooms available?"

What scares me is that some of these people have jobs that involve being around heavy machinery...with moving parts...and instructions. I think I'm going to give myself a lobotomy with an ax.

©NG61 2006

OboesHonedIambs 62F

5/22/2006 12:54 am

I've met those people. They call and say "My cell phone won't work, the screen's all black." I ask, "Is it turned on?" They say, "Which is the on button?"

Pass that axe on over this way when you're done with it, please?

Instant Human -- Just Add Coffee

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 1:12 am:
I had one room call me, ask how the coffee maker in the room worked. I went through the instructions...he said it's still not working.

I asked if it was plugged in...

Long silence......

then, "Oh...."


papyrina 51F
21133 posts
5/22/2006 12:55 am

with my shop,i close all the lights,turn the sign on the door to closed and then do the til,but people stil open the door and ask if i'm closed,i've even after locking it seen them try to open it a few times,grrrrr

I'm a

i'm here to stay

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 1:48 am:
true story: I saw a car pull up to the hotel, guy gets out...staggers to the front lobby. Now the front lobby is locked at nights, but we have a night window.

I'm standing there when this guy, who's obviously drunk, pulls on the doors, shaking the hell out of them. I ask, "May I help you?"

He wobbles around, looks at me and slurs, "Well damn, I was going to get a room, but they seem to be locked up for the night!!"

and walks out.....

I kid you not..

When I worked in a small bookstore, I'd get the same people like you: doors locked, lights off, and they'd rattle the door, asking if we were open....

GoddessOfTheDawn 105F
11240 posts
5/22/2006 1:16 am

these people freely wander all over the planet.... another xample: I got a call once 'There's smoke coming from my monitor'.... My question was: 'Did you unplug it'.... Their response: 'Why should I?'...

Another one was when I had someone type in a few commands and then asked them what was on the display.... 'A plant, but when I water it I put it on the desk....'

doh.... I'll stop now....

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 1:21 am:
Oh geeze....that's an Excedrin headache in my book.....want to join our self lobotomy party? *grins*

sexwyounow 50M

5/22/2006 2:00 am

Scary isn't it? I work around heavy machinery and some of those guys scare the crap out of me!!! Makes me wonder how they still have their hand and fingers.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 2:41 am:
well, you know what they say, "Angels look out for children, drunks, and fools" *grins*

Thanks...and welcome to the Fortress....

MamChelle 48F  
1443 posts
5/22/2006 2:24 am

i can sympathize, but here the boys have that youth makes me stupid excuse, when they see me cooking and then say "You making dinner,Nana?" Or mopping and as they trail across the floor with shoes on say, "Oh the floor wet?" Hell yeah i am still holding the mop and mooving it from side to side. Whats worse is the hubby..."You fold these?" as he rifles through and shakes out the once pristene laundry... no ax ..i might become homicidal if it graced my hands...i love comming home after being gone spell......*grins as i think happily of moving*

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 4:32 am:
Yes, but where can you move to....Mars?

Braindead does the same stuff here at the house...and I just get that glazed look in my eye, you know?

libgemOH 56M/52F

5/22/2006 3:55 am

Stupidity always amazes me too!! A simple job like watering plants where I work, one would think is a no-brainer. And the lady who does it STILL needs to be taken by the hand and shown what to water.... That is actually the mildest example of stupidity I can come up with in my many years on this planet!! ~pass the axe please~ -B

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 4:33 am:
*goes silent as Forrest Gump walks into his blog and says:

Stupid is, as stupid does...and that's all I'm gonna say 'bout that

MWWwantsmore 51F

5/22/2006 4:04 am

LOL well it makes your job interesting and you have great stories to tell!

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 4:35 am:
I don't know about interesting...maybe exasperating at times...

and as far as great stories, I wish I could tell the story about the carload of porn film actresses who came in one night looking for a room and would do anything to get one.....

trouble hasn't happened yet

TheLilFondler 33F  
2576 posts
5/22/2006 4:21 am

lol i understand!!!!

i lost my virginity years ago.....
but i still have the box.....

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 4:35 am:


MaggiesWishes 60F

5/22/2006 4:44 am

I so love the patients that look at the needle, look at me and ask
" Is that thing going to hurt? "
When I'm the patient, I always ask for drugs first, then the needle can poke me... I'm not foolish!

warm huggies 2ya

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 5:20 am:

I don't have to ask, I know it's going to hurt!!!

and to make it funnier, I've got there's where it's fun to see people who slip and bump their heads...

They'll ask the tattoo artist, "Is this gonna be permanent?"

Thanks...and I like the picture; my word, you're gorgeous!!!

angelofmercy5 59F
17881 posts
5/22/2006 5:16 am

It is sometimes amazing to me the level of stupidity that some people display. I have spent some time as a triage nurse in a pediatric office...and some of the things that parents would call in for made me think that perhaps we should require parenting courses before allowing anyone to have sex!

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 5:21 am:

As I told my youngest stepson when his boy was born, they don't come with owner's'll learn everyday...

What are some of the things you've been asked about? I'm curious...

ohcurious14 59M
1683 posts
5/22/2006 6:34 am

I worked retail for 17 years so i have more than heard my share of idiocrocies along the way!!!!

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 12:30 pm:
I can imagine.....

HBowt2 59F

5/22/2006 6:37 am

and they get to vote too.......

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 12:30 pm:
and some work with nuclear weaponry....brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

rm_CuummDrop 49F
2591 posts
5/22/2006 6:59 am

Ummm,, trust me,, people down South can't read either,, when it simply is put on the front doors of the store "No Alcoholic Beverages Sold after 11:55pm".. duh, READ THE FREAKIN SIGN People!!! Even had one take the sign down and come to me "what does this mean"... Of course i was civil and said "No Beer"! Come on Ppeeps READ the signs!!

We are in a Dry county after 11:55 pm, but right across the street, is the City (City limits are funky around here) and they can get beer

*blows kisses

Now won't last forever, so use it wisely~c

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 12:33 pm:
Oh, I lady used to hear that all the time: the convenience store she used to work at would put a time stamp on the receipts; if beer were sold after midnight, the system would make a note of the sale and alert management in a daily report. But people whose watches were running slow would still pitch a bitch about her not selling beer, "Whaddaya mean you can't sell me a's only 1159pm!?!?!!?"


rm_sexxielynn 52F
72 posts
5/22/2006 10:06 am

I have a friend who says
"You can't fix stupid"
It's so true.
My fave saying,
"If ignorance is bliss, why are there so many unhappy people?"

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 12:34 pm:
True, so very true

I used to have a bumper sticker that read, "Stupid people shouldn't breed"

Thanks and welcome to the Fortress

wickedeasy 67F  
26782 posts
5/22/2006 12:10 pm

i am typing away at the computer and my son comes up and says, "you using the computer"

sighs - so much for MY gene pool

You cannot conceive the many without the one.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 12:35 pm:
Braindead will call the house, my lady will answer..he'll ask "Mom, are you at home?"

I think both gene pools need a shock treatment.....

007sexy40plus 51F  
7603 posts
5/22/2006 1:39 pm

I used to drive a piece of heavy equipment(front-end loader) and I used to dump 18 wheelers carry shavings/sawdust. One night it was late and I was on the loader. I looked and here comes a truck driver. So I go on about my business until he gets closer.

Once I was up to the bin to dump the bucket of sawdust, he climbs up on the steps I open the door and ask, "can I help you" he said, ahhh yeah, you work here?" WTF! I look at him and say, "aahhhh No, I am an escaped convict I broke in this plant to WORK and drive this loader for free." And he looks at me funny!!!

Some people don't put their thinking caps on before they open their mouths.

I am the real deal! "Come Get Me!!!"

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 1:53 pm:

That's too rich...if I said some of the comeback lines I'd like to say to some of the people that say stoooopid stuff at the hotel, I'd be hurled from the hotel....not asked to leave, or escorted, but HURLED right out the front door!!!


rm_DaphneR 58F
7938 posts
5/22/2006 3:43 pm

The really sad thing about stupid people? You can't even use your smart-assed remarks on them because they don't understand them. About all you can do is stand there and shake your head at them.

Have tongue, will use it. Repeatedly.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 9:59 pm:

I put a speedometer on the counter in front of them, so they can tell me if I'm going too fast for them.....

Thanks for you comment and welcome to the Fortress...

micahbiguns 51M

5/22/2006 3:58 pm

This is why I choose not to work in a job where I have to deal with people face to face all the time.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 10:00 pm:
Well, I don't have to deal with that many people during the night...but the ones I do deal with.....whoooooboy!!!!

LustyTaurus 48M  
21253 posts
5/22/2006 4:21 pm

A certain amount of stupidity I can deal with...just laugh about it and carry on. some point, like the one you've reached, I'm ready to knock somebody out...LMAO. I used to be a bouncer in a nightclub, and you sort of expect stupidity in a job like that. Like the guy who keeps trying to get back in after you've tossed his ass out...THREE FUCKIN TIMES!!! (sometimes they can sneak back in....maybe they aren't the stupid ones!!)


Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 10:02 pm:

I have a real time war simulation game on my laptop....when it gets that bad, I make my army build WMD.....and cut loose.

Three times!?!?!? When I worked bars, we usually had the law waiting outside if we had to toss someone.....that's wild, three times...LOL

rm_Kissmystuff 61F
1435 posts
5/22/2006 4:49 pm

Yup..they're all over the place. Take the time I called a woman..because her check had bounced. She told me she didn't understand how it could have bounced..she still had some checks left!

Keep the axe though. It wouldn't be me that gets the lobotomy..and I'm just not cut out for prison life.



Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/22/2006 10:03 pm:
How about when your at home and your phone rings...and the person who called you asks, "Who is this?"

I love that about the checks....and I'll put the axe away...for now....


curious082385 31F
4925 posts
5/23/2006 3:15 am

Can't stop giggling...we night workers get to see some real winners, don't we? I had a man come in the other night who just wouldn't take no for an answer...told him we were sold out.
His response? "What about king-size any of those?"
Me: "No, sir, I'm completely sold out tonight."
Him: "Ok, what about one with a single bed?"
Me: "I don't have any rooms, sir. Of any type...I'm sold out."

He just kept going too...ran through every possible combo of bed size, smoking, non-smoking, jacuzzi, no jacuzzi, river view and handicapped that was possible. I mean, SOLD OUT really so difficult to understand???

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/23/2006 4:56 am:

I had a guy one night, when I told him the rooms I had left were reserved offer me $200 to give him one of those rooms....

It was tempting, but I told him no...good thing, the rest of the reservations showed up later.

So for some people, SOLD OUT is difficult to understand....


NGs_lady 64F
762 posts
5/23/2006 5:33 am

Now maybe you know why I hate dealing with the public. They will take you with them. They will drive you crazy.

Hugs and Love

NGs_lady/ Lady Stee

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/23/2006 6:47 am:
My lady, I still remember those nights when we'd call each other from hotel to hotel, laughing at these people when we had to deal with them.....

rm_Melciber 61M
214 posts
5/23/2006 5:55 am

Yeah, . . . AND we get to vote for a whole bunch of them - so far as I can tell they are just as blind/stupid.

In fact if politicians didn´t have minders you would notice a much higher rate of turn-over.

Nightguy_1961 replies on 5/24/2006 7:02 am:
I keep saying that there should be another selection in the voting booth..."None of the above"


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