On the OUTS with the IN crowd  

MrRoarke2005 51M
103 posts
8/13/2005 7:55 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

On the OUTS with the IN crowd

Well, I am facing an ever growing concern of losing my IN crowd membership when my divorce is final.

I am a big fan of the Jerry Seinfeld show. There was an episode where George figured out the power of having a beautiful wife or girlfriend. Others that normally would have shun him, instead flocked to his side and hung on every word.

Well, I am a true believer of this as well.

In my earlier days, I laughed at the episode and shrugged off the mystical powers foretold in the show. I thought it was funny but not true.

Well, all changed when I met my wife (soon to be ex)*. She is 5' 0", 100lbs, 32b, size 0 or 1. Very small, petite and tanned. Once she was on my elbow, all attention was given to us. Word spread liek wild fire and even when I was without her, her magic was still present and it attracted all those within the IN crowd. Attractive and hot chicks would walk up to me and smile. Sometimes they'd say something more than 'outta my way' or 'pass the sweetnlow'.

Now, I'm afraid that I will be losing that membership with the impending divorce. I was getting so use to it too.

This is another reason for me to enter the Divorce Diet else I will not be seeing any action anytime soon.

*Valleyrat has an acronym he uses for his future ex wife (f/ex). I refuse to create one for my soon to be ex, (s/ex). Given the ironic nature of that acronym, since I hadn't had sex with my wife since 2002. But, I digress.

redmustang91 57M  
8606 posts
8/13/2005 10:37 pm

Single guys seem to get more action here as women hope for a LTR or marriage. Create your own hot status with your own style.

MrRoarke2005 51M

8/14/2005 2:03 am

Well, stang, the crowd that I am referring to on here as was the Seinfeld Show is society as a whole and not AdultFriendFinder. No one on AdultFriendFinder associates me with my wife and so this IN crowd principle doesn't hold true. AdultFriendFinder in its own secret society and the laws of the world do not apply here.

I'm going to also disagree with the statement that most women on AdultFriendFinder are looking for an LTR relationship or marriage. Not, AdultFriendFinder is associated with other sites such as Friend Finder (a dating site) or Passion (geared towards more simgle oriented sex) as well as others. Loggin into AdultFriendFinder will get you access to all the other folks so seeing them on here doesn't necessarily mean that they are looking to hook up. I believe that the LTR and marriage seeking folks are members of these other sites and if they are on AdultFriendFinder then they are a small percentage.

I do AGREE with creating your own style. I cover this in my "Secret Society of AdultFriendFinder" BLOG.

As always, thoug, I do appreciate the post. It is good to hear what others think.

MrRoarke2005 51M

8/14/2005 5:20 am

Valleyrat, quite the opposite, I thought your ramblings were as insightful as the rest. Just skiddin.

As for the Mrs as I, our sexual history is a tale of sadness, heartbreak, mis-communication and timing. Not really relating to this BLOG post but what the hell, I'll give you the Reader's Digest version.

We got married in fall of '97 and our sex was the best ever. We both have very odd sexual history and found comfort with eachother. This comfort led to lots of sex. Only a few months into it, early '98, we started to think about family issues. We wanted on but not just yet. So, we planned on using contaceptives, her on pills and me using condoms. I quickly found out that I couldn't use condoms. I had no feeling what so ever and would go limp shortly after putting one on. We then decided to find alternative means of physical pleasure. I'll just leave it at that. Sex wasn't nearly as good as when we didn't think about it. It was work now. We now started to have sex only once a week instead of daily or twice daily.

In 2001, we decided it was time to have kids. After a year of trying, she couldn't get pregnant.

In 2002, it was decided by our family planner that I would go through some tests first. The tests were inconclusive so, I went under the knife and they removed a small part of my right testicle for research. My doc said that I could not have kids. Period. Sterile was never used but the outcome was still the same. Well, after checking the family tree, we figured on finding another surgeon with a second opion. After another surgery, it was determined that indeed there was any thing that could be harvested for impregnating my wife. Bummer. This was 2002. We had turned off the 8-man hot tub outside and we didn't have sex once due to these surgeries. Quite frankly, I wasn't in the mood. Most of the time my boys were sore.

It was her turn to find out if she could get pregnant. After many tests, it was determined that she could conceive a child. We then took the painstaking time of finding a sperm donor. After reviewing 100's of donor sheets, we found one to our liking from California. We purchased 4 units.

We began the hormone treatments. We told the doc to double the treatment right away. This typically results in twins or more. So, double dosage shots in the morning everyday for a week then if all the tests show good then the donor semen would be inserted.

It didn't take

Second time didn't take either.

Third time didn't take.

Lst chance. She was up to 4x the normal hormone amount. I mixed the hormone and she would give herself the shots. Two double shots daily.

It didn't take.

Duirng this time, she didn't want to have sex. Poor thing, it was a physically challenging time for her.

Dealing with the pain and agony of going through all the surgeries and procedures only to come up empty handed (except for the large bills $15,000+).

She became very ill. Her body rejected the last round of hormones. She had physical issues the 1st quater of the year then the mental stepped in for the latter part. We both dealt with it in our own ways.

In many aspects, this was the beginning of the end. We were so hurt that we didn't know what to say to eachother. We wanted children so badly and waited only to find out that we couldn't.

Needless to say, sex was not on the top of our list. I couldn't even hug her without her pulling away. We were both islands to eachother. I poured myself into work and she slid away mentally.

In the fall, she began to show some focus by picking up smoking and running. She lost a lot of weight that she had picked up over the past couple of years. Went from 135 to 98lbs in 60 days. She got up to where she was running 3-5 miles a day 4-5 days a week. She was on a mission. Running gave her a means to get away from the demons.

The year ended with no sex.

We were so far apart at this point int time that it was too tough to make our way back to eachother. We were simply good friends living with each other.

We haven't slept in the same bed in since 2002. She slept in the guest room. There was never an opportunity to accidently fuck let a lone intentionally fucking.

So, here we are. Who's fault is it? Neither just a several sad events where timing and communication were off, way off.

MrRoarke2005 51M

8/14/2005 9:02 pm

It is all good, valleyrat.

Sometimes its helps to type it. Not necesarily amicable but necesary.

I figure that you just twist while brushing. My right nut still is sensitive to touch. Just another nagging reminder of what I can not have.

Thanks and sorry for the lengthy post.

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