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The End Of The Search!
The End Of The Search!
It has been exactly one month since I signed onto this site as a Gold Member.
I decided I would devote real effort into finding people who wanted to share non-commital sex.
It has been a lesson in the limits of my own fantasies...and a fairly expensive, time consuming lesson at that.
What I have concluded is that, for the most part, sex without committment is largely a male pursuit.
Yes, some women do take pleasure in a variety of partners and group sex. But the number of such women is very small. Mostly, women have sex to leverage control over men and to placate men.
Most of the women on this site are either not attractive and looking for attention, couples with the wife placating her mate's desire for variety and female bisexuality, or women looking for vicarious desirability. Whatever other female participants there may be are overwhelmingly professionals trolling for clients.
One person commented to me that women really have little trouble finding sex on their own. And I beleive this is true. So why, one might ask, are there women looking for sex on this site?
Perhaps, like me, they are seeking an "easy" way to have sex outside their primary relationship. Or they are trying to please their mate. Or they have no real motive except gaining attention and wasting some time.
As one social scientist put it "I would have to conclude that women ARE NOT motivated greatly by sexual desire...especially not in the way that men are motivated." (This is not saying that women don't enjoy sex...it simply means that women's behavior does not center around getting sex).
From my observations on this site, men are overwhelmingly driven by their sexual desires and fantasies. I include myself in that description. We fool ourselves that there are women who share our desires...when the vast majority of women are using sex to get the things they really want...which are largely NOT sexual.
SO - I have given up on actively looking for sex partners on this site. I won't be updating my profile or adding any pictures. I won't continue to blog. I won't look for Cupid Partners.
My active searching on this site will cease. It's not worth the time and effort.
For the duration of my membership I will be picking up E-mail notifications of anyone wishing to get more information about me.
Other than that, my active searching is over.
8/15/2005 7:37 pm
I don't think you should quit. Things like this take time. Patience, and time and you will find what you are looking for.|
8/23/2005 10:28 pm
You are very well spoken and have described acuratly the reality of searching online. I too have discovered the same reality as you, and have noticed that for a charming man with good looks and qualities that you chances are much better at scoring a date or relationship when interacting with people in a offline forum. The odds are just better and the girls do not have to weed threw so many other poeple. I myself have spent much time online, and yielded better success on a confident approach to someone in the local area doing normal day to day activities.. Then they see who you are, and you do not have to try to be heard past all the online noise and huge ratio of males to females looking for dates.