|Blogs > MisterFreeze79 > Trying not to be a total bore|
-"What's wrong lover?"
-"I don't know, it's just, umm...God dammit this has never happened before..."
-"Am I not doing it for you?"
-"No no no, you're hot baby, I umm...probably had one beer too many...I'll be right back,"
-RUNS TO BATHROOM-
-"Penis, what the hell is going on?"
-Oh, so now something is wrong?
-"Don't start that with me, not now. I don't ask much of you, but I need...NEED you to just do what I tell you in certain situations, no questions asked!"
-Well, I'm not going to.
-I am officially on strike. I'm not going to elevate a single degree until my demands are met.
"Hey lover, everything allright? Come back and finish up will ya,"
-"I...I'll be right in!"
-So, want to negotiate?
-"Negotiate? Jesus...Penis, what the hell is going on? Why would you go on strike?"
-You can't even think of it?
-"What, should I jerk off less, massage you with the fancy skin cream, stop using duct tape and elmers glue to give myself a brazillian wax, what!?!"
-...Elmer's glue? Is that what that smell was?
-Really? How creative.
-"Coming! I'm on my way..We're gonna...we're gonna go all night, oh y...yeah!"
-"FINE, what do you want goddammit?"
-Well, to start off, I want "out" time back.
-"Out time? We did that when we were like, what, five?"
-I want out time back.
-"OK OK, I'll let you have out time when we're in the apartment, allright?
-Nope, not good enough. I want out time outdoors too.
-"We can't do that...it was cute back in the day, we'll get friggin' arrested nowadays!"
-No, eh? Oh...I feel soooo weak, I can barely talk, let alone do anything else...oohh....
-"Oh no no no, don't do this, come on!"
-Thinking about baseball...Sammy Sosa catching a pop fly...
-"For fuck's sake, all right, I'll whip you out at the bar when I'm half plastered anyway, does that work?"
-That's a good start.
-"Good good, so can we please get back to things?"
-All right all right...I'll call this a positive step toward our mutually beneficial goals.
-"All right! Wow, that's better my friend!"
-No prob, just remember our deal next time you're at the watering hole."
-"Sure sure, lets just get out there and..."
-Umm...she's gone isn't she?
-I'm sorry man...oh, and by the way...it's happened before.
-"Shut up...where's my elmer's glue?"