I Need Help  

MissAnnThrope 56F
11679 posts
10/2/2005 8:03 pm

Last Read:
4/20/2006 6:11 pm

I Need Help

I really do.

Down at a corner on my street is a major intersection. On walks, especially when I'm taking longer walks, or coming home late at night off the bus from the city, it's quicker to cut through a large parking lot.

One of the businesses that shares this parking lot is a funeral home. I cut through their driveway all the time. They rarely garage the hearse.

So, everytime I walk by, I have to veer over to the hearse and look in the back and see if there's a casket in there. There never is, but I always have to look. I did it again tonight.

God, I'm morbid.


nightstalker172 36M
1258 posts
10/2/2005 11:21 pm

LOL...you're not a necrophiliac are you? LOL j/k...Id probably do the same....but it stands to reason that they dont park a hearse with a body in it over night...LOL....but theres always a chance that there might be one and they just havent take them out for burial yet lol....


SensuousWoman3 55F
3106 posts
10/3/2005 2:49 am

LOL...that's funny...like stalker said, it does stand to reason that they don't park a hearse with a body in it over night...but, you never know, a busy day at the funeral parlor, a person (a body) could get lost! It's like losing a stack of papers when you're working in an office, "Now where did I put that dead body? I just had it a minute a go!"

I think it's like when you were a kid--you never walked by a pay phone without checking the return slot for a dime. Good luck finding a pay phone these days. I was going to say, "Where do kids find their money these days if they can't check the coin return or find a pop bottle in a vacant lot to return it to the store for the deposit?" but I forgot--that's what parents are for these days.


rm_CauseISaidSo 48F
182 posts
10/3/2005 3:13 am

Yes, you are morbid, MissAnne, and we wouldn't have you any other way, dahlink. God, I really need to start going to sleep earlier.


rm_CauseISaidSo 48F
182 posts
10/3/2005 3:15 am

See, if I got more sleep, I wouldn't keep sticking that extraneous "E" on the end of Ann. Unless, of course, you prefer a little extra "E" in your life. Sheesh, I wish there were edit buttons here.


GleesFlakyShawl 50M
1620 posts
10/3/2005 7:34 am

why? u wanna spend the nite in a casket?????


StreaktheFreak 38F

10/3/2005 8:48 am

i used to live about a block away from a graveyard...on my way to and from school, everyday from 6th grade until i left that school (junior year, and actually even after though not at often), i would walk through it and look for new graves or to see if they were preparing for a funeral...anytime someone was burried i would go and sit at the grave and wonder about the person...

i even did it during summer vacation...i would walk to the graveyard 2 or 3 times a week...just to look for them.

i think i was jealous


StreaktheFreak 38F

10/3/2005 8:50 am

causel....um...yes an edit would be nice.....not as* often


mickey7074 60M

10/3/2005 4:07 pm

Are Hearse's sexy? you bet,some time ago I had a Corvette race car and needed a cheap tow vehicle. I bought I used Hearse why they are taken very good care of and they are really cheap. You can't believe the women that were wanted to check out the Hearse, and not the race car. I guess we all wonder about the last ride.


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/3/2005 8:28 pm

nighstalker, no, I'm not a necrophiliac. However, when it's over 100 F out, I have been known to just lay in a tub of icy cold water. See, I don't just go by there at night. Even during the day, I have to check. To see if they forgot the body, or one is about to take that last journey.

Sensuous, I still check payphones for change. Finding one all depends on the neighborhood. Some areas have tons, others, you can walk a half mile to find one. And as far as the casket goes, they could have left one in there after delivering a body to the crematorium.

Cause, I've always been morbid. As a child, I was so morbid, my mother thought I was going to kill myself. I also have to start going to sleep earlier. When I sleep at all, that is. And don't worry about the E. At least you're not calling me MissAnnThorpe. That drives me up a wall.

Streak, I would have hung out in the cemetery too. But I think as a teenager, I would have taken it one step further and hidden behind tombstones as people visited their dearly departed and made them think they were getting a message from the other side.

silhouette, no, I haven't watched any of those shows. Nor read the book. But I read "Cemetery Dance" magazine, a horror quarterly. Trust me, there is no way you could be more morbid than I. Ever read, "Stiff: The Curious Lives Of Human Cadavers"?

mickey, when I was younger, I wanted a hearse. Just to freak people out. I freaked out my family, who believed it would have been bad luck. However, these days, with the price of gas... I think those things still only get 6 miles a gallon.


rm_sj365 55F
2414 posts
10/3/2005 8:54 pm

you might be morbid, but how sick am I? as I was reading, I was almost hoping there was gonna be one this time.


JustSayHi2006 56F

10/4/2005 3:22 pm

haha how could you not look??


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/4/2005 3:55 pm

sj, you know... Everytime I look, I half hope I'm going to see a casket in the back myself.

The real fun is when there's a viewing or funeral where the County Sheriff is out there, taking pictures of everyone who goes in and comes out. I always rush home and get a load of laundry, as the laundromat is all but across the street from the funeral home. Just to watch the action. Well, also to see if a Mafia war breaks out in the middle of the street.


rm_VoodooGuru1 49M
2053 posts
10/10/2005 5:17 am

I can back up Mickey's comments. I had a '71 Cadillac Hearse in my late teens and early twenties. It had a 501 cubic inch V8 - no one makes engines that big any more - it got ~6 MPG and had a 10 gallon fuel tank (!) so consequently it was a partymobile and not very practical. But... it came with a Gen-U-ine casket.

I was told it was a temp coffin, used to transport bodies short distances like the morgue to the funeral home; so it was a used coffin!

Used to put a keg in the casket, ice it down, and take it to a woods party (think hillbilly rave).

A couple that was in my circle of friends asked me if they could have sex in the coffin; well, I knew worse things had been in that casket so I was like, "Go nuts... ya pervs!


MissAnnThrope 56F
11488 posts
10/10/2005 9:22 pm

Voodoo, I'm jealous! I always wanted the hearse and the coffin. As a matter of fact, when I was 16, I worked a March of Dimes haunted house, as the vampire. I took naps inbetween tours, in my coffin. It was warm, dark, cozy and quiet. One day, I forgot to take my lunch with me. My mother stops by around lunch time, asks where I am, they lead her to the coffin and lift the lid. She almost had a heart attack, as I was sound asleep in there. After that, she threatened me with therapy, as I said I wanted to replace my bed with a coffin. But sex in a coffin? Your friends were nuts. There's not nearly enough room in one of those things for sex.


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