A Hard Place  

MischiefSprite 53F
501 posts
8/27/2006 1:44 am

Last Read:
8/30/2006 5:42 pm

A Hard Place

Well, the saying is actually "between a rock and a hard place." If it were just a hard place I might like it. Perv, you say...when you add the rock to the hard place, then it's just not very comfortable anymore.

I must have missed class on the day for "woman school." You know what I mean? How to love shopping, arts and crafts, shoes with matching purses, the color pink, soccer mom vans, gossip and secrets. I know, I'm stereotyping the typical woman. I apologize. My friends who know me in real life have seen me wearing a sum total of three pairs of shoes (not all at once) and NEVER the color pink. I would rather hang with the boys and play kickball or wrestle than sit around and gossip and tell secrets.

I'm struggling with a secret and the hypocrisy it entails, metaphorically speaking, that's the hard place. The rock, to extend this metaphor, is the guilt I am feeling. Yes, I WAS raised Catholic. But more than that, I realize as the circle widens , the shit get deeper. Nobody likes deep shit and what's worse is feeling guilty about who might get hurt as a result of the deep shit you're standing in.

No, I'm not going to tell the secret (sorry to disappoint you). I just needed to vent; to say I don't like being in this position and I wish I weren't in it. Ironically, this is NOT my secret; otherwise, I'd tell it and get it off my chest and relieve myself of the tremendous guilt I'm feeling. It's just not my place.

So, I'll sleep on the hard place and rest my head on the rock. Keep the secret and bear the responsiblity of hypocrisy. When the shit hits the fan, at least this blog will be here, and dated, so those who matter will know how deeply sorry I am to have found myself in this position.


VCF1962 104F

8/27/2006 3:04 am

I hope you can at least find some peace Sprite.

Mistress Innuendo
Taking what you say and turning it into something naughty !!

MischiefSprite 53F
334 posts
8/27/2006 8:59 am

Thank you for that comment. I appreciate your kind thought.

rm_edcore 58M
5 posts
8/27/2006 9:57 am

That's some heavy shit, hang in there. To some extent if you feel guilty about hypocrisy, then you not a hypocrit. Kind of a catch-22.

Hope things work out all right.

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