Depression is taking over...  

Mikey_B1972 44M
134 posts
3/20/2006 4:55 pm
Depression is taking over...

Little by little, i am getting discouraged about this thing we call life. I am realizing I am getting older and that my body is no longer the lean mean temple it once was. I am finding it much harder to "hook up" than it ever used to. I am not sure if it is due to the older crowd I am now pursuing or is that I am just losing it. I know when I go out to the clubs, alot of chics look and gander, but it is what happens from there that worries me, nothing......In the days, I was alot more muscular than I am now, but I was in the path of finding myself and figuring myself out. I now know that I am a more of a slacks and dress shirt guy as compared to the old blue jeans and t shirt. Can what I have spent years searching for crept up to haunt and hurt me? I must take a step back for a minute. I know when I am at the club, my head is high and my attitude is out there, meaning outgoing. I have had friends(girls) tell me that I am just too intimidating for the scene I am in. Is this possible? Do I need to go to higher class club to get what I seek? I really try to mingle as much as possible and be as generous as possible. When I say this, I mean I buy rounds at the bar, pass them around and salute to whatever comes up. This is me..For my sisters Bday, I cut up 8 pounds of strawberries, dipped half in chocolate and the other half went into champagne flutes for her bday salute. People looked at me like I was crazy, but again, this is me..I had a few friends tell me that by me doing these things, it actually makes some girls think I am too high maintenance. How is this so? I don't know anymore. I come home everyday just to check my blogs or see if anyone has emailed me, other than the ones I chat with regularly. Does my profile sound as if I am looking for a wife? Am I that bad looking? What the F*$k is the deal. If I started training again and shed a few pounds, would that make the difference? Isn't that shallow? I give up........


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