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less than 3 hours
less than 3 hours
and i am going to be 38... damm today was really harsh on me.. even with all these new friends, i still feel all alone at times...
Wish someone was here to just hold me till midnight gets here
I really hate birthdays...
Ok i guess i better shed some light on what happened 16 years ago.
It was the Coldest winter in Recorded history in Texas... temps were -35 with a howling 45 mile an hour wind that dropped the wind chill to -150.
My family were all invited to my brothers house to meet his New wife, under the STRICT rule that i was NOT allowed to go. I thoguht i had enough propane to heat the house, but i was wrong. By the Time i figured out i needed a refill the price jumped from .10 a gallon to 1.00 a gallon with a 100 gallon minimum. I was Broke. I tried to walk over to my cousins houses to use a phone to get osmeone to come get me and take me to a Warmer place, only to be turned away cause they were having a Party, and didnt want me "crashing" it. I finally made it back to my house, which was quite drafty, where i tried in vain to stay warm.
After all the gas was gone, i layed in bed, and started to suffer hypothermia. Lucky for me, my best friend just HAPPENED to get leave from the army, and came over to give me a birthday card.
When he found me, he told me he carried me to his car and got me to his house, where his mom ( a nurse ) was able to get me into a Tub of water. According to them, my body temp had already fallen to 86 degrees and they had feared they got to me too late. IF they had come another hour later, i wouldnt be here right now.
Since that day, i have dreaded my birthday. I still feel cold every year, and i still have yet to make peace with most of my family.. in fact, some of them still insist they never turned me away, while others have so much as said its too bad i was found.
well, 2 hours to go. and here i sit, in a dark room, cold and alone.
i hope this year will be better
12/23/2005 6:10 pm
Hugs - sorry for your family difficulties - remember you have lots of new friends to fill your heart with warmth.|