Here  

MajorEasy 47M
3805 posts
6/16/2006 11:06 am
Here


This is an observation and answer to similar questions from 2 women...it's totally NOT politically correct, but it's my honest opinion...please don't read it if you only wish to read nice things...however...take it in the spirit it is intended and we may all share and learn a thing or two...



. . . . . . . MajorEasy's Blog...
There is no use getting, into heavy petting
it only leads to trouble, and seat wetting.....
.


MajorEasy 47M
2693 posts
6/16/2006 12:42 pm

Two women from this site have asked me similar questions...one asked...why do guys who seemed nice and likable suddenly stop calling?? And the second asked...how come I keep getting stood up?

I met the two of them at different times, but will put them together here for the ease of discussion...and for the sake of identification...let's call one A and the other B...

Once again...I wish to make it clear that I'm not trying to put them down here...it's something I saw that should answer their questions...but hints were ignored and I really don't know how to say it outloud to them without causing a scene....so here it is...take it however you will...believe me, don't believe me...I'm not bothered...I still think of myself as your friend...if you can change a little...those problems may end altogether, and you can get the best out of this site...if not...carry on...just stop moaning about it...for now you know why...

I first spoke with A without meeting her and through emails and phone calls...she asked me this question...well, I haven't a clue...thinking in my mind...are you so ugly that guys only wish to meet you once?? Yes...men are visual beings and we are shallow...nothing new there...

But having met her...she's nice...good looks and pleasant personality...smart too...so it needed more investigation...

With B...the emails were less easy...she believes herself to be an intellect and half the time...okie...most of the time, I had no idea what she's talking about...until her question...she made plans to meet a few guys from here...and only one showed up...she cannot understand why...are the guys watching her from afar and decided to bail when they saw her?? And the guy she met once...he never called again...it's the same...I was clueless...and we agreed to meet to work through this...

She wasn't bad...nice figure, pleasant disposition, and very ready with a smile...there's no reason for guys to run away from this....

The only common thing they share is that they are both young...below 25yo...which in my books aren't actually suitable to be in here...they need the attention of a boyfriend...but I wasn't going to judge...they may be more mature than their ages implied...

I met A a few times...she is always fun to chat with and plenty of laughs....but she is also the type of girl who expects the guy to pay for everything....no problems in most cases...but it depends on which guy she's with...some may not take too kindly to being a sucker...since she also has a thing about being 'careful'...so most of the guys she had met from here, aren't going to get any action till she's sure...which could be a long time....
I understand in her world (of the normal boyfriend / girlfriend scenario...) this is highly acceptable...however, in AdultFriendFinder...not saying the guys here aren't gentlemen...they may well be getting it from more than one source...plus if he pays for everything and still has to go home to whack off...he might as well just stay at home and whack off...saves time plus some extra cash in his pocket....
Nothing wrong with needing to be wooed...but do you really want an equal-sexual-relationship?? Or are you just looking for some schmuck to feed you?? Are you seriously in this site for the sexual kicks?? Or are you here to gleam what you can from unsuspecting men??
You have a job which pays you...don't ever think your money is more important to you than the guy's money is to him....at least offer to pay for things...most guys will refuse...but they will remember that you offered...

She also has one annoying habit...if say...we agreed on monday to meet that friday...I would sms her during the week to ask what she'd like to eat...where she'd like to go, etc...and I'll hear nothing from her...that is...until 2 hours before we're suppose to meet...she'll sms to ask what time I'm picking her up?...of course, by that time...I've usually made other plans already...if she was un-reachable throughout the week...how do I know the date is still on??
And if you say you'd call a person back (which I got a lot when I called her after hearing nothing from her..)...please do it within at least 24 hours...after 72 hours...I would have quite possibly forgotten what I wanted to say to you...

A great thing about her though is she is always willing to apologise....that's very nice...but if a guy is left wondering for a whole week...after a few weeks of this...he'll give it up and move on...no amount of sorrys will bring him back...it will in effect be interpreted as being insincere...


Now..onto B...nothing wrong with her at the onset...but having met her 4-5 times...the earliest she has arrived for our dates, is 20 minutes late...once she left me waiting for her for 45 minutes...the only reason I hung around?? I was picking her up and I had the comfort of my car and a book...if we had made plans to meet elsewhere...I would have been gone after 15 minutes...This should explain why she herself feel she's being stood up...no, my dear...the guys left already, thinking they got stood up!!!

For her (this could be a young person thing...) she also has a thing about answering her phone...she doesn't seem to believe in doing that....she told me...just call me...I'll see the miss call and will call you back...eeerrrrmmm...would that be next tuesday or just before Christmas 2008?? If you tell a guy to sms you so you can call him back...then you should do so as soon as possible...not 2 hours later...his mind is not always on you...and he won't know if you are ever going to call...if you cannot return calls so quickly...stop asking him to do it this way...

This girl asked me to organise a party on her behalf with some friends (mostly mine...long story...) and we agreed that I'll pick her up half an hour before the time...so there's plenty of time for us to get there (I was smart enough to refuse her request that she'll meet us there...we may still be waiting now if I agreed to that...)..yup...this was the time she was only 20 minutes late...I sms her when I got there...and after 7 minutes of not seeing her...I called...and she said she just woke up....wow...

If she thinks that her tardiness should be endearing...then I fail to understand her displeasure at my anger....my flare of temper are usually quite loveable too...

B is different to A in one major aspect...B doesn't believe in apologies....she acts like it's natural that everyone should wait for her...well...if you have no consideration for other people's time...other people are not going to care about your feelings....
And it doesn't hurt to say thank you...whether you mean it or not...if you had asked a favour from someone...even if you didn't think they did a good job of it...thank them anyway...this one act seperates a person from a bitch...


I'm not sure if this will help them or anyone else...but let me say this as bluntly and as truthfully as possible...if you ladies keep on doing things like this...sure...guys will still see you...and you'll think to yourself...those who cannot handle my "tests" do not qualify...fair enough...but let me say this....

I'm stating the bleeding obvious but yet, so many ignore....guys look at things and situations differently from women...we don't need the feeling of love or attachment or chemistry to have sex...and we will fuck your brains out( or at least our own brains out...)...and still never call you again...that fuck was for the earlier effort we put in...and unless you are of the supermodel quality...or the wife-worthy category...it's very likely you will never hear from us again....seriously...you would not want to go out with complete losers...and those who aren't complete losers have better things to do and nicer people to meet....

Men will say almost anything you wish to hear, and do almost anything youwant us to, if we want to get into your pants...and it is up to you if you want to keep us in your pants or not...the choice and prerogative is entire yours....this is a very powerful upperhand that you ladies hold...but if you decide to throw it all away...by being unthinking, rude and simply inconsiderate...the self-protection mechanism that guys have...is to have sex without feelings...and we WILL fuck you for the sake of fucking you...and it will most likely mean absolutely nothing to us...except to know you've now been fucked!!

If an equal-footing, sexually exciting encounter is what you crave...treat others with some thoughts and consideration....and they will respect you and in turn treat you like a lady....otherwise...I suggest you stay away from this site...find easy preys at pubs and discos...for with those...you don't have to ever see them again....

I'm not trying to preach but I hope some of you may find answers in what I have written...yes...we're all human and none of us is perfect...but a little courtesy will go a long way in any human relations...I get upset just like everyone else...but when I agreed to meet you...I try my best to be nice...please don't take advantage of it...at the end of the 'date'...if we're both happy with each other...we can plan to meet again...no need to spoil it upfront and then wonder why guys don't ever call again....

. . . . . . . MajorEasy's Blog...
There is no use getting, into heavy petting
it only leads to trouble, and seat wetting.....
.


rm_iwannatellu 45F
933 posts
6/16/2006 1:30 pm

I find this a very interesting, honest, and enlightening opinion. Thanks.


MajorEasy 47M
2693 posts
6/16/2006 2:28 pm

    Quoting rm_iwannatellu:
    I find this a very interesting, honest, and enlightening opinion. Thanks.


Thanks my dear for reading and your kind comment...please share your thoughts with me...


. . . . . . . MajorEasy's Blog...
There is no use getting, into heavy petting
it only leads to trouble, and seat wetting.....
.


rm_sashalia 30F
19 posts
6/17/2006 12:14 am

Hello there Major! Great write up as always. Here are several comments I have (rather short, I have a hair appointment in 30 minutes and I need to take a fast shower too!):

[quote]
The only common thing they share is that they are both young...below 25yo...which in my books aren't actually suitable to be in here...they need the attention of a boyfriend. [/quote]
I couldn't agree more (of course to the dereliction of my own circumstances )... to my surprise, as I enter the 20s - relationships wise I find myself surprisingly more needy than I've been or ever imagined being. I would constantly seek the attention and the (hopefully) adoring doting of my boyfriend to feel loved. In retrospect, and away from those saccharine visions of love... I suppose it really might be something associated with age. (Early relationships during sec school and JC were mostly of convenience, companionship and well for putting up appearances in school to be "cool"). I do however, see myself shedding these rather sappy skins in later years as I develop more of a sense of my individuality, my own strength and of course realise that GUYZ ARE SCUMMZ.

I met A a few times...she is always fun to chat with and plenty of laughs....but she is also the type of girl who expects the guy to pay for everything...I understand in her world (of the normal boyfriend / girlfriend scenario...) this is highly acceptable...

[quote]
For her (this could be a young person thing...) she also has a thing about answering her phone...she doesn't seem to believe in doing that....she told me...just call me...I'll see the miss call and will call you[/quote]
Alas! another age-ist statement. tsk tsk I'm starting to believe you have something against young people (not that you are old to begin with). This annoying habit of "don't call me i'll call you" happens to be one of the things people would look out for when you suspect yourself dating a married/attached person. In the most optimistic light (and severely neglecting her obvious time warpedness in replying), she might feel uncomfortable picking certain calls in certain areas/company/times and would be alot happier seeking the warmth and suffocation of a closed closet to do a little chitchatting ;P

[quote]
And it doesn't hurt to say thank you...whether you mean it or not...if you had asked a favour from someone...even if you didn't think they did a good job of it...thank them anyway...this one act seperates a person from a bitch...
[/quote]
Ugggh, I dislike people who can't even put up some resemblance of decency and appreciation.(not to even touch on manners). Can't write anymore.. ticktockticktock. getting red streaks for my hair.

tata!and be well major.


rm_sashalia 30F
19 posts
6/17/2006 12:17 am

realized I didn't reply to a quote I had marked out, oh well. Also apologies for the rather messy way the post turned out. I have absolutely no clue how this place functions.


MajorEasy 47M
2693 posts
7/17/2006 12:01 pm

I'm putting this post up again...just got 'played out' last weekend and after talking with Da woman...she thinks I should add it here instead of posting a new thread....

A new woman friend from here asked me to organise a swing party for her...she has never been to one and wondered what it was like...so I called around and got 4 couples together...on the day and time though...this girl decided she wasn't going to show up...didn't even have the courtesy to call me...and when I tried to call her...her phone was off...

I was left facing 4 fairly upset couples...they thought I got them together so that as a single guy...I get the benefit of being with their women...The only thing left for me to say to them was to check with other couples I've been with and if that was my way of doing things...anyways...they grudingly accepted my apology and I was left out of my own party...

Suffice to say...this is the last time I will organise a party like this and allow the girl to travel on her own....

I'm still thinking if I should go burn her house down...only problem...it's her parent's house and they didn't do anything to me...

The more women I meet from here...the more disheartened I become...perhaps I should just go back to normal dating sites...where the women don't think they are such hot shit...

Don't mind me...I'm just venting...I've met many wonderful women from here too...just the last few have been somewhat abnormal...

. . . . . . . MajorEasy's Blog...
There is no use getting, into heavy petting
it only leads to trouble, and seat wetting.....
.


MajorEasy 47M
2693 posts
7/17/2006 12:14 pm

    Quoting rm_sashalia:
    Hello there Major! Great write up as always. Here are several comments I have (rather short, I have a hair appointment in 30 minutes and I need to take a fast shower too!):

    [quote]
    The only common thing they share is that they are both young...below 25yo...which in my books aren't actually suitable to be in here...they need the attention of a boyfriend. [/quote]
    I couldn't agree more (of course to the dereliction of my own circumstances )... to my surprise, as I enter the 20s - relationships wise I find myself surprisingly more needy than I've been or ever imagined being. I would constantly seek the attention and the (hopefully) adoring doting of my boyfriend to feel loved. In retrospect, and away from those saccharine visions of love... I suppose it really might be something associated with age. (Early relationships during sec school and JC were mostly of convenience, companionship and well for putting up appearances in school to be "cool"). I do however, see myself shedding these rather sappy skins in later years as I develop more of a sense of my individuality, my own strength and of course realise that GUYZ ARE SCUMMZ.

    I met A a few times...she is always fun to chat with and plenty of laughs....but she is also the type of girl who expects the guy to pay for everything...I understand in her world (of the normal boyfriend / girlfriend scenario...) this is highly acceptable...

    [quote]
    For her (this could be a young person thing...) she also has a thing about answering her phone...she doesn't seem to believe in doing that....she told me...just call me...I'll see the miss call and will call you[/quote]
    Alas! another age-ist statement. tsk tsk I'm starting to believe you have something against young people (not that you are old to begin with). This annoying habit of "don't call me i'll call you" happens to be one of the things people would look out for when you suspect yourself dating a married/attached person. In the most optimistic light (and severely neglecting her obvious time warpedness in replying), she might feel uncomfortable picking certain calls in certain areas/company/times and would be alot happier seeking the warmth and suffocation of a closed closet to do a little chitchatting ;P

    [quote]
    And it doesn't hurt to say thank you...whether you mean it or not...if you had asked a favour from someone...even if you didn't think they did a good job of it...thank them anyway...this one act seperates a person from a bitch...
    [/quote]
    Ugggh, I dislike people who can't even put up some resemblance of decency and appreciation.(not to even touch on manners). Can't write anymore.. ticktockticktock. getting red streaks for my hair.

    tata!and be well major.
Hahaha...my dear...I need you to pay for my medical fee...to uncross my eyes took a couple of hours of treatment....

First up...thanks for agreeing with the main parts...I believe that people should have manners and treat others with some due care and consideration...

Secondly...I'm not against young people at all...I was simply trying to pin-point a cause for their behaviour...perhaps it's age...perhaps not...I really don't know...but I dare say this though...I've been with many 19yo who don't behave like this...it's upbringing for one...and if I'm being cynical...they have overblown egos from this site because they are so sought-after by hundreds of guys...



. . . . . . . MajorEasy's Blog...
There is no use getting, into heavy petting
it only leads to trouble, and seat wetting.....
.


Become a member to create a blog