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My life so far
My life so far
I believe that I am an unique individual. Certainly I never planned to be so unique. In fact at school I never really stood out from the crowd except that I was a tad shorter and I had traveled widely even then. I never dreamed that at 45 I would have still been single. i.e. Never married.
When I started work in the nursing field, I was looked on with envy by my peers as though delving into the honey pot. It was true I was surrounded by women and it is true that some were very attractive. That does not mean they were attracted to me, and as some people have mentioned, love in the workplace is fraught with complications. Shift work made things difficult, just in maintaining the friends that I had. I soon began to like not being bothered by other people and being able to do my own thing. I still love it, to the extent now that I feel must be borderline autistic or something. I enjoy friends, but loosely.
Strangely I find that I spend most of my social interactions at work. I get along with my colleagues well and my patients generally respond quite well to me. I guess I should maybe go into work, but I tend to love the down time with myself. This puts me in a very uneasy spot. I have since I was a teenager wanted to get married settle down and even have children. As I have gotten older the prospect of having my own children has somewhat dwindled and the prospect of engaging a young woman without her own has likewise dwindled. I have become more open to the idea of an instant family but am rather uneasy with that scenario purely because I don't know what I would be like. Also in that equation, I feel that I may not be as effective a parent without the child/children being mine. I guess there is always going to be the issue of coming after the children in any kind of issue, I guess that depends on their age etc. I guess the tumultuous teen years would be very difficult here.
Being relatively new to the US I have found other issues confronting me as I have perused women. As most single women now have there family, are post their first, second or even third marriage, the whole landscape seems changed. As I have moved a lot over the past few years, from two other countries, I do look a little unstable on my resume.
I have taken steps to address some of these issues.
I have started my karate classes.
I have endeavored to stay in the same area.
I have moved into a nicer dwelling, in the downtown area
I have started to look at doing further study
I have become more involved AdultFriendFinder
It is my hope that I shall be able to form some form of meaningful relationship in the next year or so but I have found that putting a time limit is rather silly. Most of my friends over the years say if it happens, it happens, but my experience has been that if you sit back it most probably wont.
If any of you have any ideas about how to better my likelihood of success, I am definitely all ears and would appreciate your input.
7/11/2005 10:17 am
Hmmm... when are we going to work on planning our Ecuador trip??? Hope to catch you online later.....|