Survival, or Success!  

Linds1957 59F
14777 posts
5/5/2006 7:49 am

Last Read:
5/7/2006 10:01 am

Survival, or Success!

My Gawd.. I survived yesterday!!!

First, I went to a meeting where they told me that my boy, whom I love very very much, cannot do 2 grade 12 subjects at the same time and pass them both. He has to pick one of them to really do, and one of them to kindof do. Then get a tutor in the summer. I handled it ok at the meeting then fell apart after that.

Then I had to make supper then go to another "grad" meeting. That's where it truly hit home that all these other kids are normal, taking normal subjects, doing normally at school. My boy was there, fidgeting.. wiggling.. talking the whole time, spinning chair tops..coughing.. sitting and resitting.. playing with his watch...

How can it be that my boy took an engine out of one truck, took the engine out of another truck.. put the first engine in the second truck. Didn't mark a thing to remember where anything goes.. and he did it right. The truck runs beautifully complete with air conditioning, radio.. power windows...He did it mostly himself, because his dad can't remember where anything goes.
This same boy cannot learn english or social studies...He cannot do math..This loving, caring, handsome young man is a complete disaster at school. The stress makes him angry and upset. He's not happy at school.. It's been a very long 12 years, 13 including kindergarten.
Put him in a yard with machines and he loves to be there, making things work. And he does it well!

I'm going to have a party to celebrate my boy. Most people may not understand him, or understand all the talent that he has, but I do, and I want him to be appreciated for who he is. He can't do school work, but he can fix nearly anything. More than that, he's a kind, caring, loving, wonderful person. He struggled to make it through school to this point in his life and i'm not going to let a piece of paper, or lack there of, ruin his success of making it this far....

smileguyqc 53M

5/5/2006 8:17 am

You love him and thats all that really matters... help to find a way to do what he loves and is good at and make a life of it.

a123rat 49M
1112 posts
5/5/2006 8:48 am

Book smarts & Life smarts are two different things. Be thankful he has life smarts. I know guys that were good in school, but I wouldn't let them put oil on my bicycle chain!
Encourage him to work at getting the schooling he needs and reassure him that his talents are important.

fantasylover_05 62M

5/5/2006 8:59 am

You should get him tested for ADD (attention deficit disorder.. with or without a hyperactiity component)... sounds like classic symtoms... and they can HELP him!

We all have our strengths and weaknesses... some are so damn "book smart" but lack simple common sense... some are soo street wise and yet can barely read.... that does NOT make any of them better or worse than the other!!



Linds1957 59F

5/5/2006 9:24 am

yup.. thanks.. Smileguy

chas4037 67M
4119 posts
5/5/2006 12:40 pm

Linds, your son is VERY Talanted and smart in a way that many book-smart people can't understand. He will do quite well in life; a "kind, caring, loving, wonderful person" will make some lady quite happy, and his mechanical skills will earn him a good living. Far too many people look down on good mechanical skills, yet think nothing of paying big bucks to get their car or truck or tractor fixed.

Here's an old joke you'll enjoy, I bet.

The big city Doctor (pick any profession you want to blast here, dentist, lawyer, etc) came home from a tough day at work and his wife met him at the back door.

"Honey, the toilet is all messed up, what do we do?" so of course Mr. Smartypants Dr calls a plumber and the plumber says "I'll be over in 1/2 an hour"

Just on time the plumber arrives, and in ten minutes has everything working properly again. He takes a moment, writes out a bill, and hands it to the Doc, who pulls out his checkbook and writes away.

Just as Doc finishes writing the check and handing it to Mr. Plumber, he does a moment of mental arithmetic.

"One Hundred Dollars! For ten minutes work? THAT IS $600 an HOUR!I'm a respected Surgeon and even I don't get $600 an hour."

And as he is folding the check and tucking it into his overalls, the Plumber turns and says "NEITHER DID I WHEN I WAS SURGEON!"

Congrats, Linds, on raising a fine son!

Luv2Lick0466 50M

5/5/2006 2:42 pm

I can see and understand your concerns over your son's situation.Instead of falling apart,be thankful you have him in your life.He has been well blessed with a loving mother and a gift I as well as many men don't have,working on cars and trucks.To me switching motors on two trucks and getting everything correct on both trucks would be impossible for me,he is truly talented.Take care
as always............ See Ya'

rm_balls4u57 59M
125 posts
5/5/2006 11:01 pm

Sometimes school can get boring. Just encourage him to do well at what he is good -- be it fixing cars - that's great -- one day he will figure out what he wants to do and pursue it - keep encouraging.

blue061245 71M
331 posts
5/5/2006 11:51 pm


If your son is really good with machines, you might want to look at an apprenticeship in one of these trades: auto mechanic, Heavy Duty mechanic, millwright. To get his papers, he would ahve to go through an apprenticeship, and there would be some math and some paperwork involved. However, the math side of things would have practical applications, as opposed to some of the geometry and algebra theory that swamps some kids in Grades X to XII.

Lethbridge Community College does some apprenticeship training, but I do not know if these trades are taught there. If they are, you might be able to arrange a meeting with an instructor and see if the math content is something he could handle. If it is, then he would have to find an employer who would be willing to take him on as an apprentice.

Of course, this is not the only thing he could do with his life, but these trades have widespread application and the employment prospects are quite good.

Linds1957 59F

5/6/2006 4:40 am

Thanks everybody...

peguiz 59M

5/7/2006 8:12 am

Read your post and had to say that with a mom like you your boy will be just fine....he indeed is remarkable and you should celebrate who and what he is everyday.....don't let him forget he has worth...that he is valuable....if you do he will not only be remarkable today but will be remarkable every day of his life.
Often school does not do justice to young people.....the most important people we have around us.....the people who school is supposed to be providing an education.....the people who school is supposed to be instilling in a sense of worth and purpose...the people who schoolis supposed to be preparing a place in the future.

Continue to be bold and don't give up...this is a time in your boy's life he needs your support....this is a time that will pass...your boy has endured twelve years of public education and has almost come to the end of what has obviously been a difficult journey....he with your support will always be a remarkable person....

Once he finishes here he can move on ....and because of who he is and who you have been he will taste more than his share of success....

I like your courage and your sense of what is right and wrong....and who and what you are.....

Linds1957 59F

5/7/2006 10:01 am

Thanks Shy...some time maybe we could chat a bit about things...

Thanks peguiz...It doesnt seem like this time will pass. It's dragging by.
Thanks for all the encouragement..It means alot to me and it's helping me keep on going.

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