you're a cheat!  

LadySunrise 33F  
2019 posts
2/13/2006 6:36 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

you're a cheat!

Lets play a little game....

ladies and gentleman can you

Name
That
Cheater???

contestant #1: in the dating scene the contestant found 3 really awesome dates. things heat up between him and a date. the physical realm has been breeched!! The point of no return is fast approaching!! HALT! Life steps in and the date is unavailable..OH NO~ what’s a man to do? Date #2 2 is swift to the rescue!! SUCCESS he gets some action!! Finally!!! Someone else to ~lend a hand~ OHHH he wants to get serious with date #2 but she has him as her rebound so that’s not going to work!! IT becomes written as a story as old as time. They are sex buddies!! Nothing more!! Date #3 takes things at her pace(scorned woman)…she is making sure all the signs are there, she wants the clarity, she wants some assurance she is MORE than just a piece of meat!!! The contestant likes that. He appreciates her and her decisions. He wants her pace but wants the life of date #2. Life frees date #1 and she turns to him to pick up the pieces. SHE is the best of #2 and #3!! He isn’t ready to say goodbye to any of the ladies but #2 wont have it any other way. If he wants to CHEAT(there is that word) and do what he wishes then he isn’t ~worth~ her time.

IS HE A CHEATER?????

Contestant #2: married, having many issues like communication and timing he is looking for understanding…certain that he don’t want to leave his wife he just wants more than what she has. **Sounds complicated to me but is the intent cheating???

IS HE A CHEATER??

Contestant#3: also married. Dealing with his wife’s unfaithfulness, he is tempted by the idea of doing the same. **Battle of the cheaters??? Who is the better cheater??

Could he BE A CHEATER??

Contestant #4: serious dating, marriage comes up, he hasn’t sated something…the need to want something just a little different from what he has is growing more and more everyday. The woman wants him happy. “If it would make you happy then I’m happy,” she explains. Making a note that she would want to try other partners as well. He turns into a raging madman and accuse her of screwing all the guys him and her both know!! She says to him…You don’t have your curiosity anymore?? Do ya??(thinking that if he can do it why cant she??)

Would he have been a JEALOUS CHEATER??

Contestant #5: is dating a ok kind of woman. Things pick up and he meets the family. He bonds quickly and more deeply with a close relative. (sister, cousin, mother) considering the feelings of all parties, everything gets put on the table.

Is he a “KEEP IT IN THE FAMILY” CHEATER??? Is this kind of cheating worse than any other kind??


Is there such a thing as a cheating mind but not a cheating body? Or vice versa??

This is a cheating post…and all its hardships and burdens. Is it ever ok to cheat? What happens when you cheat? Have you been cheated on? Have you cheated? What happens??? What changes?? do you look at your mate differently??


live more, laugh often, love much


LadySunrise 33F  
2432 posts
2/13/2006 6:44 pm

just because i said he...dont mean the situation could happen to a woman...

live more, laugh often, love much


rm_emerald6912 48M
545 posts
2/14/2006 12:20 pm

LadySunrise, i think the silence is golden on the commentary front, perhaps a nerve has been touched, cheating is endemic on all fronts imho, not just relationships, from doping in sport to all sorts.

Worst thing is to cheat yourself.

great post.


LadySunrise 33F  
2432 posts
2/15/2006 9:50 am

emarlad!! that is a good idea!!! thanks for the inspiration!!

sweetcat!! thanks sooo much!!!

lots to ponder!! im glad that my post brough out such a good response!!! i think you are right !! HUGGS

live more, laugh often, love much


tillerbabe 55F

2/15/2006 10:26 am

It's all about communication. Have the decided boundries between the two been crossed? What are the "rules" between the couple? It becomes less complicated with good communication and rejecting assumptions.

Contestant #3: "Revenge" never makes it better and two wrongs don't make a right. It's so much easier if people just talk.


redswallow777 48M
6810 posts
2/17/2006 10:56 pm

Well, I think most everyone has touched on what I think is the key to a healthy relationship.....communication.....with it there is a chance to work most anything thru....without it the walls just get taller and thicker.

One would expect that after many years of marriage communication would just flow naturally....like a stream. I have found it never just flows....you have to work at it constantly....and it can never happen without both people working at it.

But then you are talking about cheaters....not communicators. I suspect by many people's definition I am a cheater for being here at AdultFriendFinder.....for them there is this demand of total exclusivity in the relationship.....a kind of ownership. I married you and you are my husband....or my wife.....and I will not share your love with anyone.

Well, I think you have read enough of my blog to know I am not into ownership of anything or anybody. The most important thing for me is that my partner love me. I don't try to control that love....I don't demand that they love only me. I just want that person to love me....for me to be their primary love.

I have never liked the phrase "he/she is cheating on me." It speaks to me only of ownership....not of love.


rm_emerald6912 48M
545 posts
2/22/2006 2:30 pm

    Quoting redswallow777:
    Well, I think most everyone has touched on what I think is the key to a healthy relationship.....communication.....with it there is a chance to work most anything thru....without it the walls just get taller and thicker.

    One would expect that after many years of marriage communication would just flow naturally....like a stream. I have found it never just flows....you have to work at it constantly....and it can never happen without both people working at it.

    But then you are talking about cheaters....not communicators. I suspect by many people's definition I am a cheater for being here at AdultFriendFinder.....for them there is this demand of total exclusivity in the relationship.....a kind of ownership. I married you and you are my husband....or my wife.....and I will not share your love with anyone.

    Well, I think you have read enough of my blog to know I am not into ownership of anything or anybody. The most important thing for me is that my partner love me. I don't try to control that love....I don't demand that they love only me. I just want that person to love me....for me to be their primary love.

    I have never liked the phrase "he/she is cheating on me." It speaks to me only of ownership....not of love.
LadySunrise, sorry to hog your post.

redswallow777, I understand your aversion to ownership, cheating is about the deceit that there is an 'ownership'.

If you commit to an exclusive relationship, then commit to it, call that plain, it is. If you can communicate with your partner and agree that its non-exlcusive thats great. Yet if you do neither and use a form of deceit, I personally find it hard to see where love and truth might lie within such a scenario.


LadySunrise 33F  
2432 posts
2/24/2006 8:24 am

tiller that is sooo very true!!!

red...well sometimes it can be more and sometimes less

NO PROB emarlad...my place is your place!! feel free to speak your heart here!!

live more, laugh often, love much


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