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Riding on elevators is not fun. We are forced into close quarters with strangers and it's so quiet you can hear people's stomachs rumbling. We'll stare at our shoes, our hands or just straight ahead to get out of engaging strangers in conversation.
As you know, dear diary, I'm not saddled with unease or feelings of insecurity when around people. Why should I be? Gramps taught me at a very early age that all people are just as full of shit as I am. Anyway, the best way that I've found to liven up the
atmosphere in elevators is to tap the shoulder of one of the men avoiding eye contact and ask,
"Hey, how about a blowjob?"
That usually makes the ride much more enjoyable.
Thanks to TZ!
3/4/2006 7:03 am
TZ has told me some interesting stories since she has gotten up the nerve!!!!!
Reminds me of a young engineer that I once hired . I'd take my staff out for drinks once a month. He would always survey the other patrons, select the most attractive single lady, and approach her.
Most of the time he would return to our table quite quickly after having been slapped or at the very least, rudely responded to by the young lady.
Someone would always quiz him, but never a word about his failed attempts.
After several months, my curiosity got the best of me, and so I told him, that as his employer, and as the company owner, I really had a need to know what was happening.
He told me that his opening line was, "Hello, my name is David, how do you like me so far?"
If he got a positive response, then he would continue by describing himself, his career, etc. If things seemed to be going well, he said, "I then come right to the point and ask, 'Do you want to fuck?'".
No wonder he was being rejected. I pushed for more details as to why some of ladies got really upset, and in many cases stormed out of the lounge!
"Well, most of the time they say "NO!' and tell me to get lost! So I just comment that ,'I guess that a blowjob would be totally out of the question!'," .
I just shook my head saying, "Good luck!"
So we soon started taking bets on total minutes before David would be rejected and/or slapped !
We all lost our wager a few months later when David walked out of the lounge with the 'bombshell' of the evening!
We did not see him for a week. To the best of my knowledge Davi and she are still married, have a family and he is doing very well in the offshore industry out of Newfoundland!
So, you never know MsHuny, it might work!