So then his GIRLFRIEND asked...  

Knot4Everyone 40F
734 posts
6/1/2006 9:14 pm

Last Read:
6/4/2006 9:37 am

So then his GIRLFRIEND asked...

<----- The girlfriend???

I get a kick out of people, I really do. I am constantly amazed at their thought process (or lack thereof), their actions, their notion of themselves, etc. Perhaps what gives me the most amusement is when I observe someone trying to be sneaky - to get away with something - and watching them get caught.

I'm not talking about criminal activities here, but mostly the regular limit-testing sort of thing. In regards to this particular site, that mostly means people trying to "step out" without their significant other knowing about it. People looking for a little extra-curricular activity; a mistress.

I try to stay as far away from being the "other woman" as possible. Those situations can get messy in a hurry, and I don't like being caught in the middle of other people's problems. This is especially troublesome when I am blind-sided by the sudden appearance of the spouse/gf.

Why Knot4, what brought this on you ask?

I'm glad you asked! Allow me to explain...

A certain guy from this site - we'll call him The Builder - sent me an email. It was a nice enough email, very innocent and rather sweet, so I responded. He then replied, then I replied, and so it went. We exchanged emails of increasing length for a couple of weeks, then agreed to meet in person. There were no promises or expectations, we were still trying to get to know each other.

The Builder and I met at a restaurant. We talked for a bit, ate dinner, talked a bit more and then went our separate ways.

A week went by without hearing from The Builder. Not a problem - I was no longer interested - but at dinner he talked about some important things he needed to deal with the following day. Just being a nice person, I went ahead and emailed him to see how everything went. No response. No problem.

Well, today I received an email in my non-AdultFriendFinder inbox with the subject "Regarding AdultFriendFinder". It was from a woman I have never even heard of, and the email simply asked if I was Knot4Everyone from AdultFriendFinder. I replied with the question "Who are you?". The response I received explained that she is The Builder's gf. She mentioned them breaking up and getting back together. She asked for details about our meeting (The Builder and I ). Apparently she is living in another state and about to move here and live with The Builder. She loves him, but doesn't want to be hurt again or cause her children any trauma.

WTF?!?!?

Okay, so he told me many things about his life, but he never mentioned having a gf. That's fine, though, because nothing happened and I have no desire for anything to happen in the future. However, here is what bothers me:
1. He lied about not having a gf
2. His gf has my email address
3. His gf is now interrogating me

I don't like this at all! I don't know if this woman is really his gf - she could be the crazy ex-wife. She shouldn't be asking me anything. The Builder is the one she needs to be talking to! Arrrgggghhhhh!

I haven't tried to email or call The Builder yet, but I'm debating it. I wonder if he knows that she has contacted me, and what he thinks/would think about it. It's something he should know, but I don't think it's my place to tell him (just like it's not my place to tell her anything).

Why, oh why, must people play so many games?

This would be a funny story if it was happening to someone else! I'm not quite ready to laugh it off just yet because this woman could really be a nut, and I have no idea what she is capable of doing. Right now I'm just going to be cautious...

Have you ever been caught in the middle of someone else's relationship? Have you ever pulled an unsuspecting person into the middle of your relationship?

What things have you tried to get away with while "testing your boundaries"?



toothysmile 50M
16515 posts
6/2/2006 12:35 am

oh my...
that is messy... and scary.
I hate triangles, and yet, I 've been involved in more triangles than I ever cared to be.
HOWEVER...
I have never lied to anyone, nor misled... and certainly not told only half the truth [which to me is just lying, if the other half truth reveals a different image].
now... in your case...
I would just ignore him. He doesn't deserve your time. Forget him and move on. If the said girlfriend contacts you again in your non-AdultFriendFinder address, report it to AdultFriendFinder immediately.

Don't forget to smile. The sun is shining...
in a burning way...


Djeeper1987 47M

6/2/2006 5:49 am

Oh wow, that is messy. All I can say go with cautions and hope that it will go away on its own. How she got your email is even scarier. Does this guy have your current email? If so, perhaps he is playing a game by giving her your email and starting this BS.

For now I would just pass on off and move on.

Carpe Diem


alphuctup 40M

6/2/2006 6:52 am

Hmmm not good. Just walk away.

How's the no smoking going? Probably not too well when things like this happen.


rm_dragonheat23 51M
1158 posts
6/2/2006 11:03 am

My advise...
Run, don't walk.
You need to remove yourself from that situation ASAP.


HBowt2 58F

6/2/2006 11:21 am

I don't think you should reply to her at all Knot's....it's his problem not yours......if she wants to know what he did she should ask him...and if she has the kind of doubts she claims to have and has kids then she should run a mile too....


Wordsmith2004 36M
7233 posts
6/2/2006 3:32 pm

Ummm....can you say "Mr. Homeschooler and the Hot Babe?"

Yeah...

doesn't it suck big monkey balls when you're labeled AS or the FIXER of everyone's problems?

BTW when you're finished with that chick in the pic..I have some raw leather for her to chew through....'could use a new pair of sexy black boots!

Conserve Water and Prevent Global Warming: Shower With A MILF!


rm_truedom2 55M
663 posts
6/2/2006 4:00 pm

Expose the fuckchop


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 4:49 pm

    Quoting toothysmile:

    oh my...
    that is messy... and scary.
    I hate triangles, and yet, I 've been involved in more triangles than I ever cared to be.
    HOWEVER...
    I have never lied to anyone, nor misled... and certainly not told only half the truth [which to me is just lying, if the other half truth reveals a different image].
    now... in your case...
    I would just ignore him. He doesn't deserve your time. Forget him and move on. If the said girlfriend contacts you again in your non-AdultFriendFinder address, report it to AdultFriendFinder immediately.

    Don't forget to smile. The sun is shining...
    in a burning way...

He hasn't tried to contact me at all, so ignoring him is not a problem. I think he even removed his profile. That's what she says, anyway. She also said that they were planning on making a couples' profile on here... Yeah, she opened way up! All I asked is who she was...

I assure you, toothy, that I NEVER forget to smile! Thanks for the reminder, though!


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 4:51 pm

    Quoting Djeeper1987:
    Oh wow, that is messy. All I can say go with cautions and hope that it will go away on its own. How she got your email is even scarier. Does this guy have your current email? If so, perhaps he is playing a game by giving her your email and starting this BS.

    For now I would just pass on off and move on.
I don't know how she got my email addy, but she has sent me five emails!


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 4:55 pm

    Quoting alphuctup:
    Hmmm not good. Just walk away.

    How's the no smoking going? Probably not too well when things like this happen.
I'm just going to ignore the emails - maybe she'll get the hint and move on...

The not smoking thing is getting better! I will write a post about it in a few...


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 4:57 pm

    Quoting rm_dragonheat23:
    My advise...
    Run, don't walk.
    You need to remove yourself from that situation ASAP.
I agree! My first plan of attack: ignoring her. If that doesn't work then I'll have to come up with something else...

BTW, I learned something about you the other day, from a comment you left on another blog. I can't remember which one right now, but I do know that we share a hobby!


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 5:00 pm

    Quoting HBowt2:
    I don't think you should reply to her at all Knot's....it's his problem not yours......if she wants to know what he did she should ask him...and if she has the kind of doubts she claims to have and has kids then she should run a mile too....
That's what I was thinking. If she has to question what he tells her, then why would she want to move in with him? See - I just don't get people! Ignore her, right. Got it!

I'm going to write a post about my not smoking status, and you know I'll be expecting a comment from you. Consider yourself warned!


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 5:01 pm

    Quoting Wordsmith2004:
    Ummm....can you say "Mr. Homeschooler and the Hot Babe?"

    Yeah...

    doesn't it suck big monkey balls when you're labeled AS or the FIXER of everyone's problems?

    BTW when you're finished with that chick in the pic..I have some raw leather for her to chew through....'could use a new pair of sexy black boots!
Are the boots for you or me?


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/2/2006 5:02 pm

Expose him? To the crazy woman? There's nothing to expose...


wigggly_n_Framer 49M/40F

6/3/2006 9:59 pm

I will respond to this..because I AM the girlfriend who emailed knot4. I needed some clarification to the situation. No, I did not live out of state, I did however live an hour away. AdultFriendFinder and long distance relationships are really hard for anyone to handle. Especially when you are looking for something a bit more long term. Nice picture of "the ex" knot....LOL..but not even close.

I am not crazy, nor was I happy with the situation...


Knot4Everyone 40F

6/4/2006 9:37 am

    Quoting wigggly_n_Framer:
    I will respond to this..because I AM the girlfriend who emailed knot4. I needed some clarification to the situation. No, I did not live out of state, I did however live an hour away. AdultFriendFinder and long distance relationships are really hard for anyone to handle. Especially when you are looking for something a bit more long term. Nice picture of "the ex" knot....LOL..but not even close.

    I am not crazy, nor was I happy with the situation...
Well, you guys seem to have worked things out - good for you...


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