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9/12/2005 3:07 pm

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3/5/2006 9:27 pm


Step-By-Step Process of How to Break Up With Your Boyfriend

What Every Woman Needs to Know
By Jeanette Hedglin

Almost every woman will have to breakup with a boyfriend at some point in her life. In fact, you are about to receive a step by step process of how to break up with your boyfriend from the break up queen herself, me. I have dumped men of every type. So trust me, when it comes to breaking up, I can make a man see the light. This step-by-step process is based on factual evidence of physiological studies and experience. Breaking up is never easy, especially for the one being dumped. Chances are the soon to be ex-boyfriend doesn’t want to be a soon to be ex-boyfriend. Men, especially, don’t deal well when they are being dumped or rejected.
See a females brain functions different from a males brain. Martha Bridge Denckla, PhD, a research scientist at Kennedy Krieger Institute, has concluded in her studies done on 11 April 2005, that a female uses both left and right hemispheres of the brain. Unfortunately the male only uses the left hemisphere of the brain, however a male’s brain is about ten percent larger than a female’s brain. The differences in a female’s brain than a male’s brain can cause major problems with communication, identifying emotions, and possible aggressiveness. A female’s language vocabulary is going to be wider and more advance than a male’s vocabulary since she is using both sides of her brain. So in fact women and men actually speak a different language. Hearing is the same way. Since a males vocabulary is so limited due to the fact men only use the left side of their brain, he will often mistaken sentences and conversations at hand. This causes a severe communication gap between the two sexes. This brain link also drives our emotions. Women as a whole are quicker at identifying emotions and even controlling their emotions. Women in fact are more emotionally based the men. Men, however, have little control over anger responses and are more aggressive then women because of this. Some me in fact have more anger responses and are more aggressive then others. This results into physical abuse and violence against women. This is why when women breakup with their boyfriends, they should really do it right. If your boyfriend has a habit such as drugs, abuse, lying, cheating, stealing, stalking, smothering, ignoring, perversion, killing, emotional abuse, or possibly homosexual tendencies you should already be gone. Men tend not to understand, acknowledge, or even except breakups. That’s why there is a step-by-step process below to help you in this hard but necessary situation. This process will help you do what’s best for both you and him.
The fist step to ending a relationship is realizing it’s going nowhere. This is the most important step. This means you are out of the denial phase, when you were just fooling yourself into believing everything was going to be ok. If you don’t want to be with your boyfriend anymore, if you’re not committed to your boyfriend anymore, and if you don’t love your boyfriend anymore then it’s best for you both to breakup. Even if he doesn’t want to break up, it’s not fair to both of you to be in a relationship where those feelings no longer exist. No amount of effort your boyfriend puts in to your doomed relationship is going to fix that. When you reach this point of reality, you have begun the road of healing. You are now prepared to do what’s best for you. Nothing ever lasts forever and most relationships end in breakups.
Pre-preparation is the next step. This will take a week or two to do. Don’t rush! Time is an asset. It’s the key factor in your soon to be ex-boyfriends acceptance of the situation and your ability to move on. Many men who don’t accept the situation kill themselves, become abusive, or even become a stalker. These situations are very scary when it comes to a woman’s safety. Keep an eye out for a possible substitute for you when it comes to your love life. Every one knows the quickest way to get over a breakup is to get right back out and start dating again. Do things that make him want to breakup with you! For example, call his mom and discuss your problems in your love life without his knowledge, stand him up and be late for dates, call him in the middle of the night to tell him a bad dream that you had, talk to him less and less, pick fights over stupid stuff, and of course, if your living with him make up a reason to move out. This give you an edge on what’s about to happen. If you can tell he is starting to feel bad don’t let the guilt get to you. This will help you both in the long run and just keep in mind it is over.
Next is the initial preparation. This takes roughly a week maybe less. This is the fact, that you both know its over but no one has said the actual words yet. Hopefully, if your lucky, he will have already broke up with you, but there are those rare few who refuse to give up. You tell him you need time to think and you feel it would be in both of your best interest to date other people. Tell him you have a lot of complication right now and it’s just to confusing to talk about it right now. Tell him you still care about him and that he will always be a good friend of yours. Set a date to meet up so you could do the initial act of ending the relationship. If he calls any time during that time, do not return the calls. This is suppose to be your time to prepare and get situated. You have to make sure you have a substitute boyfriend and plenty of friends to lean on. Lets face it! This is not easy on you either!
Now it’s time for the initial breakup. If he’s smart he will have already broken it off with you. Don’t do it by phone or e-mail. He deserves to hear it from you face to face. Take him to a restaurant you know he hates. Towards the end of dinner after you have made casual conversation, you start talking about all the problems you two have been having. Talk him about the conversation problems, the fights, the loss of common interests, and the loss of happiness. Tell him everything he did wrong. Then be honest about what is really bothering you. Tell him that it’s not about him, but about you. Take responsibility! Talk about the future you two have as friends. After you have re-assured him and stroked his ego, tell him it’s over. Tell him, that one day he will find that special person to love eternally and that she will be very lucky to have him. Ending on the best possible terms is always a good thing, because you never know, you might decide you made a horrible mistake and want him back. Remember anything’s possible, and there is a thin line between love and hate. Love is known to break the rules.
No one enjoys breaking up in most cases but everyone at some point will have to breakup with someone. Wouldn’t it be nice to make it as painless as possible? Now with these dummy proof steps you can. Take the time to breakup with dignity. Don’t hurry, you will regret it if you do. Women no longer have to dread breakups and they will be able to bounce back with class. Men will respect you for it. Men will also be accepting of the situation because of these skillful tactics that you have perfected. Remember that you are doing yourself and soon to be ex-boyfriend a big favor. Be strong and don’t give in to guilt. I know crying is a powerful thing so don’t give into that either, especially, his. Women, remember you’re not alone! You have a sisterhood that has gone through the something. Don’t let a man push your buttons. After all, are we women or are we sissies?

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