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A Bit About Me
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Sep 19, 2011 8:40 pm
3038 Views
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My new Introduction:
I don't think it matters too much what I write here. I don't believe women really read these profiles.
Well what I mean is they don't do the searching. I suppose they will read them if something piques their interest in the hundreds of messages they receive from men on this site.
I am not a salesman and can hardly sell myself here. I suppose if someone is interested in meeting me, they will, if they are not intrested, no loss, life goes on.
My old Introduction:
I suppose like most others I am searching for something, I am just not sure it can be found here.
So I am here to explore myself through creativity and sexuality. The have mostly spent my time here writing a BLOG Invigoratorious.
If I were to describe what I am eventually looking for it would be that I am ultimately seeking ONE attractive, HWP like-minded female around my same age for traveling this journey of life together.
I just don't know if I am ready for it or if this is the right place to look, so in the mean time of preparing myself for that special person, I hope to learn about myself through others experience and hopefully help others by sharing my own.
My Ideal Person: My new statement:
There is not an "ideal" person. Everyone brings something different to the table. There is not a "one". I do not believe in soul mates. I am just looking for someone I am compatible with in and out of the bedroom. If you disagree with any of the above statements, then we most likely will not be compatible.I am 44-year old male not sure exactly why I am here.
My Ideal Person: My old statement
I want to fall in love for the last time in my life. I want to share my life with ONE woman.
I want to find my best friend.
I want to inspire her to be the woman she has always wanted to be. I want to be inspired to be the man I know I can be.
I want to share our common interests, develop new ones together and support each others interests separately.
I want to make love passionately for hours and also fuck in a frenzied minute. I want to find my soul mate.
I want love and be loved.
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At This Moment, Very Little Matters
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May 9, 2012 12:52 am
164 Views
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At This Moment, Very Little Matters
I retired early but woke up a few hours later. My mind spins and I can’t sleep. I suppose because this is the one place I can express myself, I come here. Made a few changes to my profile and blog settings to pass time. I know it makes little difference. I can’t even define what my expectations are at this point, I just know what I have is not what I want. I seem to be in an abyss. A few things have happened, none too major worth mentioning, to get me to this point. I’m not to worried but it does get old at times. Little matters, at this point and it is just going through the motions to get to the other side. It matters not that I can't sleep.
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Add A Post: From the AudioFile Library: 04/28/2012 12:27 PM
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Apr 28, 2012 10:27 am
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While sipping my morning coffee and letting my iTunes DJ select randomly, a song by Matthew Sweet popped up, “Nothing Lasts.” Such a sweet little song that I wasn’t quite familiar with, I knew the song was by Matthew Sweet but wasn’t sure what album it was on. So I checked, to no surprise it was from his 1991 magnum opus Girlfriend.
I shouldn’t have been surprised. That album just get’s better with time. If you have not heard it nor own it, I enthusiastically urge you to stream it, download if you must but if liked please PURCHASE.
Everything is great about this album beginning with the beautiful cover art of actress Tuesday Weld. I did not know it at the time but after reading about the album it is known as a break up album after his divorce.
What a fantastic album I will have to listen to it again all the way through. For some reason I find it comforting to visit depression from time to time. It’s such a familiar feeling perhaps.
A friend and I have always discussed how pain is a great motivator and how artists generally do their best work. Like an artists best albums may coincide with battles with substance abuse.
I have always thought that once an artist receives some success and life becomes generally better, they lose touch with the real world and how to assimilate to the rest of us.
This could also be viewed in the same way where a couple forms and drifts from the pack, to start a family. I often laugh about some of my old friends posting kid pictures on Zuckerberg’s site. I’m not “friends” with these kids, what do I care about them. Those old friends have lost touch with us that did not drift down that road.
Of course I think most people have drifted down that road, which makes it difficult for me to identify with the breeders being childless and matrimonially challenged.
It’s not really a challenge, though I often wonder what if’s, I am quite pleased I never went through a divorce.
OK suffering from writer’s block and being blog post deficient for a while, I am not disciplined or focused and I have drifted off on a tangent. So I am going to end here, post the album cover art and the song lyrics.
If one could
Stop time, or make it up
If two could realize the best of luck
If I could locate a god above
And you only wanted to be loved
Then I'd try to hang on to the past
But you know that nothing, oh no nothing lasts
Nothing lasts.....It's time to
Move on, let the past go
I waited for you here, but you never showed
Although I asked you to let me know
I only felt a cold wind blow
While I tried to hang on to the past
But you know that nothing, oh no nothing lasts
Nothing's in your way
Now you can stand right up and run
Wouldn't even change things
If you took back what you've done
I have tried to hang on to the past
But I couldn't keep my grasp, because nothing lasts
Nothing lasts
Nothing lasts
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24th HNW Entry: Thar She Blows!
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Apr 25, 2012 5:44 am
394 Views
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You will have to take my word for it but there are little blue whales on my new boxers along with little red anchors.
I’m no marine biologist, so I can’t determine if they are sperm whales.
Happy Half-Nekkid Wednesday!
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Happy Birthday bigboobsinla!
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Apr 15, 2012 4:37 pm
553 Views
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Wishing my good friend  a Happy Birthday!
Since you could not spend it in Texas;
I thought I would send a little Texas to you.
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Oozing Bloggy Goodness
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Apr 13, 2012 4:24 pm
571 Views
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So I haven’t blogged in a few days, mostly because I don’t know what to blog about. I doubt too many would be interested in my continued log of diet, exercise & sleep patterns, although they are all going well.
I sort of refuse to return to the way I was before Christmas lamenting the past and exclaiming my woe over the loss of a past relationship.
So what am I to blog about? I suppose I could actually blog about sex, since this is a sex site. I suppose in some ways I am somewhat conservative. Don’t get me wrong, those who have met me from this site can attest that my conservatism disappears behind closed doors and the kinkster inside me cums out, pun intended.
I’m just not that forthcoming with my exploits, perhaps eventhough there is some anonymotity on this site, nothing can really be protected in this digital age. But I feel I must be more adventurous in my remaining gold membership time on Adult FriendFinder.
I will still be conservative, but will try to let down my guard slowly. I've already returned to my exhibitionist side by posting some self pleasure videos on my profile. For some reason I abandoned it while my blogging persona blossomed but I'm trying to bring the two together. I hope you view them, rate, comment and even suggest ideas for future videos.
It can be assured I will revisit my old blogging patterns again but I hope to change somewhat. So I post this picture displaying what will happen for me tonight. Of course all my cum will be devoured.
Stay posted.
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23rd HNW Entry: Giddy Up!
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Apr 11, 2012 6:23 am
644 Views
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Ride ‘em cowgirl, specifically reverse cowgirl.
After you’ve been rode hard, let's not put you up wet.
Crawl inside my pup tent for a good brushing & rest for the night.
Happy Half-Nekkid Wednesday, yall!
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Tuesday April 10, 2012 07:48 AM
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Apr 10, 2012 5:48 am
667 Views
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Forgive me if these blogs seem repetitive or uninteresting, I am just trying to get back into the swing of things
I went to sleep last night around 9:30 PM, earlier than I have retired in a long time. So I did get eight hours of sleep last night, I usually get around six or so.
I think I need to try to get more sleep, as I look in the mirror I have dark circles underneath my eyes that I have to attribute to years of fitful sleep.
I nearly stayed home this morning in bed rather than go to the gym but I let the alarm repeat itself and I finally got up. Hopefully I can keep the momentum for it to become a habit.
I do quite enjoy listening to my iPod and just zoning out on the elliptical trainer. I do use the time to pray and focus on the day ahead.
The gym I am a member of is a little neighborhood gym with 24 hour access, so mornings are somewhat desolate.
I usually arrive when it is still dark and leave as it gets light, spending around an hour.
One thing I do like about getting up early is it allows for a lot of time before work and I don’t have to rush. I usually am never in any hurry to get anywhere.
Fortunately for me I am somewhat the boss over our contract, so I don’t really answer to anyone on a daily basis. It makes me feel better to be responsible because I want to rather than having to adhere to it.
Of course, a lot of times I take advantage of my freedom but do try not to abuse it. Well hopefully this was not to boring or painful. It is often hard to treat this blog as a journal because I do know some read it and have met a few to do. So the anonymity is somewhat removed but I feel those people I have met accept me for who I am requiring no apology.
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Monday April 9, 2012 07:51 AM
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Apr 9, 2012 5:51 am
662 Views
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I don’t really mind Mondays much. Sure I would rather sleep in, and then lounge around but having some schedule sort of puts me on auto pilot where I do not have to decide what to do.
I suppose it helps that I seem to enjoy my job more than I ever have in the past. I am thankful that it is the one consistent thing that has not disappointed me in the past year or so.
So I think it is that schedule or routine that is comforting. There are other things I have been doing lately on a consistent basis, mainly a diet. I’m surprised that I have stuck with it over the past month or so.
Consistently working out still seems to be elusive. I almost gave in to sleeping in this morning but forced myself out of bed. Really that is the biggest hurdle for me. So I feel good after an hour and am not rushed to work.
Unfortunately the memory of feeling good will not transfer well tomorrow morning at o’ dark thirty. But at least today I did well. Happy Monday.
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Happy Easter
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Apr 8, 2012 7:15 am
714 Views
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Happy Easter All, hope everyone has a good one. I believe I will. I woke up early than I wanted to this morning, but isn’t that always how it is on weekends?
So I poured a bowl of honey nut cheerios to combat my high cholesterol and fired up the old desktop. I had to upload the discs that I found in the clearance bin yesterday. Quite a haul too, about 25 new discs all for a dollar each.
I kind of love how this digital age has made the compact disc seem worth less these days. So thank you to those download files than be corrupted and lost with ease.
No thanks to those that continue to steal their music, you know who you are and there’s no rationalization that can substantiate your theft. Wrong is wrong, no way about it. Just be pleased that you helped an industry die and cost quite a few people including myself their livelihood.
OK, off my soapbox, I know you can’t stop progress. Like I said the benefit for me are all these thieves trading in their discs which just makes it cheaper for me. Yes I do have to store them but if you think about, I get a whole album for a dollar way cheaper than downloading.
After my cheerios I ate a delicious pink grapefruit bought from the farmer’s market around the corner. Then I heated up some water in the microwave to steep a bag of Echinacea tea, fortunately I only have to spell that tea rather than pronounce it, which I am still having difficulty.
First I have been uploading nine Christian music discs bought yesterday. I do still like to listen to that genre of music on Sundays as it is one way for me to feel closer to my maker.
About a month or so ago I did try out a new church at a friends suggestion. A non-denominational church, I enjoyed the youth of the congregation and the format but a bit too much singeing. I attended a couple of weeks in a row but haven’t been back in a couple of weeks.
I may attend this Easter morning. I do hate to be somewhat the hypocritical inconsistent attendee but you have to start somewhere and I just want to see how their service is.
Later I will meet my family at my sister’s house for Easter dinner. We will also celebrate my mother’s birthday that will be this Tuesday. I bought her a nice card and found a copy of one cd that I think she will like.
I will find out from my Dad when does Lent actually end, which I am quite certain is over now, but I do want to know his interpretation. I will probably have my first ice coffee in over a month on my drive home and settle in for another installment of celebrity apprentice.
I think today will be a good day. Hope yours is also.
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Sick of Myself
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Apr 7, 2012 10:28 am
775 Views
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It’s April, so I guess it is time I blog about something this month. Almost Easter and the end of Lent. I tried to look up what the actual day which is the end of Lent, but of course the internet offers varying answers. I decided to just continue with my sacrifices through tomorrow rather then waste more time searching for the answer.
I suppose the only thing that I was actually able to consistently give up for the past 40 days was coffee, well I did give up seeing a therapist but I don’t think that was really a sacrifice and something I will continue well beyond the end of Lent.
It doesn’t really matter what I gave up, little has changed. This is perhaps why I don’t blog so much anymore. There was a time when I needed to pour out my soul, but I seem to be just so repetitive that it even sickens me. So the only way I know how to stop is to just stop.
One thing I read recently was a little practice of when thoughts occur that I do not want to think, was to shout out loud STOP! I have done this a few times, when my tenant creeps into my head although the only time I shout is when I am alone. It does work somewhat but it always comes back. I don’t know why, I am so sick of it.
So I am back to the same old lamentations and need to shock my system. I think that is why I have been willing to try so many different things over the past year but little has helped. It was suggested that consistency would be the key for me but I tire or lack discipline.
I do not like to remind myself that it is the moment or the journey to be enjoyed. I suppose I have always been one to focus on the destination or the past. OK I am not use to writing and am a little sick of myself now, so I am just going to post. I may be back tomorrow, I may not.
Sick Of Myself from 100% Fun is the fifth album by Matthew Sweet.
You don't know how you move me
deconstruct me and consume me.
I'm all used up, I'm out of luck I am star struck
By something in your eyes
that is keeping my hope alive.
But I'm sick of myself when I look at you
something is beautiful and true.
World that's ugly and a lie
it's hard to even want to try.
I'm beginning to think
maybe you don't know.
I'll take a leave, the room to breathe
The choice to leave it
I'll throw away a chance at greatness just to make this
dream come into play
I don't know if I'll find a way
'Cause I'm sick of myself when I look at you
something is beautiful and true.
World that's ugly and a lie
it's hard to even want to try.
I'm beginning to think
maybe you don't know.
I'm beginning to think
maybe you don't know.
Something in your eyes
that is keeping my hope alive.
But I'm sick of myself when I look at you
something is beautiful and true.
World that's ugly and a lie
it's hard to even want to try.
I'm beginning to think
maybe you don't know.
I'm beginning to think
maybe you don't know.
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