In A Hole  

rm_IanDark 55M
16 posts
4/4/2006 7:44 am
In A Hole

I've been feeling a little nostalgic lately. I'm not sure why, but maybe I long for simpler times. Maybe it's just missing certain feelings that I used to get once upon a time.

For example, the other day I saw three Native American kids playing on a snow bank. They were having a blast. One got on top of it and shouted, "I'm king of the world!" It made me smile. He was just having so much fun and not a care in the world. No bills. No rent. No house payment. No child support. No insane taxes. No gas. You get the idea. He stopped and waved at me. "Hi!" he said, a big smile spreading across his beaming face.

"Hi," I said back. Maybe it was that contact that reminded me of what it was like to be him.

A couple of days ago, I saw a young couple come into where I work. She was beautiful. She wore a long black dress and those shoes.
Her hair was long and blonde, but tied up in corn rows kind of like Bo Derek in "10". The couple started making out shortly after they sat down.
It was easy to see they were in love. It was more than lust. There was a tenderness between them that lust just doesn't seem to have. I miss that. I miss that tenderness. It makes me feel a little sad because I'll probably never feel that kind of tenderness again. Ever.

Then I saw a little girl skipping behind her parents on the way to the restaurant. It was so cute. She, just like the little boy on the snow bank, didn't have a care in the world. She was with mom, dad, and her sister. All she knew was they were going to eat almost any kind of food imaginable. She wasn't worrying about the $30,000 she'll have to pay the government because "Chimpboy" couldn't wait to go to war with Iraq. Nope... All she cared about was getting ice cream.

Sometimes it feels like the whole world is falling apart right before my eyes and there's not a damned thing I can do about it. It makes a person feel like crawling inside a hole and sealing it up. Maybe I'll come out when everything is better. Or maybe I'll never come out again. Too bad there's no holes around to hide myself.

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