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Honesty and Jealousy
Honesty and Jealousy
Honesty of word and jealousy.
Two subjects today, that I think have been in the back of my mind for a while. Both are very important, and if looked at a certain way, go hand in hand. Honesty of word came from a conversation with a friend the other day. Jealousy, well that has come from observation lately more then anything else.
Honesty in ones word should be one of those sacred things. You should not treat it lightly, for what you say and write is either heard or read by many. What seems insignificant at the time to you, may mean worlds of difference later on to others. I have run across this the most in discussions with friends about relationships. It seems that anything and everything will be said to start a relationship. Whether it is meant or not, without the care in the world of what it may do later on. I guess it is not realized the damage that is done to the other persons psyche when lies and mistruths are said, especially when the other person thinks that you are speaking with honesty of heart.
I find myself to be very jaded about honesty of word. After being burned by several when I was young, I look at things with a much more focused eye. I look at the whole picture when someone is talking to me....taking in everything....watching and listening. I sometimes hate that I have become this way, but it seems the only way to protect myself. You always hear the phrase "read between the lines"....I say take it one more step....listen between the lines as well.
Jealousy......where to start on this. Why is it, that when we get into relationships, we decide we cannot trust the other person. Why do we decide to fall in love with someone when they are one way, then worry about the way they are, and want to change them. Why do we obsess about people and relationships. You would think we would know better. Jealousy is what I would call a deal breaker. When it comes up, it puts both parties at such unease, they start to bicker and fight about it. What is worse, is that in the begining, they may not even realize what it is they are fighting over.....just that they know there is an issue that upsets them.
I watch this happen over and over to my friends. I have done it. It is so hard to control. I have come to the conclusion that you absolutely have to accept the person for who they are. Understand how they are. And if You cannot handle that, then don't go into the relationship. Too many times I think we fall in love/lust with a persona.....then realize later, that there is more to the person then that. We react badly, because we are not ready to deal with the multiple layers.
You can also say the same for jealousy in friendships. It happens there, just as much as in romantic relationships. It is a shame to see it. I guess it is just the way it is.
Thought for the day:
Be honest with yourself, and then being honest with others is easier. Know what you want before you ask, and know that the person you want it from is going to be the way they are. Don't ask for change, either adapt and accept, or move on.
5/18/2006 8:29 am
Very good post here...thanx |
No Day Is So Bad It Can't Be Fixed With Great Sex!
5/19/2006 9:02 pm
Nice post Helper |