Misc Military Jokes  

HardNhorneee 52M
127 posts
8/15/2005 10:32 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Misc Military Jokes


During training exercises, the lieutenant who was driving
down a muddy back road encountered another car stuck in the
mud with a red-faced colonel at the wheel. "Your jeep stuck,
sir?" asked the lieutenant as he pulled alongside. "Nope,"
replied the colonel, coming over and handing him the keys,
"Yours is."

**************************************************

Having just moved into his new office, a pompous,
new colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on
the door. Conscious of his new position, the colonel quickly
picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, then said into
the phone, "Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon
and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you
for your good wishes, sir." Feeling as though he had
sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he
asked, "What do you want?" "Nothing important, sir,"
the airman replied, "I'm just here to hook up your
telephone."

**************************************************

Officer: "Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?"
Soldier: "Sure, buddy."
Officer: "That's no way to address an officer! Now let's try it again!"
Officer: "Soldier. Do you have change for a dollar?"
Soldier: "No, SIR!"
**************************************************

Q: How do you know if there is a fighter pilot at your party?
A: He'll tell you.
**************************************************
Q: What's the difference between God and fighter pilots
A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot.
*************************************************
Q: What's the difference between a fighter pilot and a jet engine?
A: A jet engine stops whining when the plane shuts down.

*************************************************
An Air Force Chief Master Sergeant and a General
were sitting in the barbershop. They were both just
getting finished with their shaves, when the barbers
reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces.
The General shouted, "Hey, don't put that stuff on
me! My wife will think I've been in a whorehouse!"
The Chief turned to his barber and said, "Go ahead
and put it on. My wife doesn't know what the inside
of a whorehouse smells like."

**************************************************

"Well," snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the
bewildered Seaman. "I suppose after you get
discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting for
me to die so you can come and pee on my grave."
"Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. "Once I get out of
the Navy, I'm never going to stand in line again!

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