Bible salesman joke  

HardNhorneee 52M
127 posts
8/13/2005 7:29 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Bible salesman joke

A minister concluded that his church was getting into serious
financial troubles.

Coincidentally, by chance, while checking the church storeroom, he
discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened
and distributed. So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three
volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the
bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed
money for the church.

Peter, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.

The reverend knew that Peter and Paul earned their living as salesmen
and were likely capable of selling some bibles but he had serious
doubts about Louie. Louie was just a little local farmer, who had
always tended to keep to himself because he was embarrassed by his
speech impediment. Poor little Louis stuttered very badly. But, not
wanting to discourage poor Louis, the reverend decided to let him try

He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars
stacked with bibles and asked them to meet with him and report the
results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following
Sunday...which they did.

Eager to find out how successful they were, the reverend
immediately asked Peter, "Well, Peter, how did you make out selling
our bibles last week?"

Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Peter replied, "Father,
using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 bibles, and here's the
200 dollars I collected on behalf of the church."

"Fine job, Peter!" The reverend said, vigorously shaking his hand.
"You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you."

Turning to Paul, he asked "And Paul, how many bibles did you manage
to sell for the church last week?"

Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied,
"Reverend, I am a professional salesman and was happy to give the
church the benefit of my sales expertise. Last week I sold 28 bibles
on behalf of the church, and here's 280 dollars I collected."

The reverend responded, "That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are
truly a professional salesman and the church is also indebted to you."

Apprehensively, the reverend turned to little Louie and said, "And
Louie, did you manage to sell any bibles last week?"

Louie silently offered the reverend a large envelope. The reverend
opened it and counted the contents. "What is this?" the reverend
exclaimed. "Louie, there's 3200 dollars in here! Are you suggesting
that you sold 320 bibles for the church, door to door, in just one

Louie just nodded.

That's impossible!" both Peter and Paul said in unison. "We are
professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many
bibles as we could."

"Yes, this does seem unlikely," the reverend agreed. "I think you'd
better explain how you managed to do accomplish this, Louie."

Louie shrugged. "I-I-I- re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for
sh-sh-sh-sure," he stammered.

Impatiently, Peter interrupted. "For crying out loud, Louie, just
tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!"

"A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was," Louis replied, "W-w-w-w-would
y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible
f-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks-o - o -o - or wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just
l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here and r-r-r-r-r-read it t-to

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