To Cope  

Goldenhairgodess 63F
471 posts
8/29/2005 1:29 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

To Cope

What should a person do with their strongly felt emotions? They could suppress them, ignore them, or release them. The choices we make and the methods we use can be considered our coping
skills for our emotions.
I love to hear the joyful squeal of a happy child holding a wiggly. face licking puppy. That is the release of a positive emotion. Positive release of emotions are welcome
anywhere at nearly any time.
A warm embrace and deep kisses are expressions of positive emotions. A scream on the
roller coaster can be both fear and delight combined.
Negative releases of emotions are less welcomed by most people. There could be angry yelling,foot stomping, and door slamming.
Having grown up with siblings who released their negative emotions by doing the above
mentioned releases left me desiring a better way, a quieter way. to deal with my own negative
emotions. I would draw a picture before I could write. Then I began writing things down as my
emotional release.
I still do that, only with posting on a discussion board or in my blog I am sharing my
emotions publicly and allow others to make comments back. Often what is said is a comfort to me.
There is a major disadvantage though. The posting lives on, long after the emotion has disappeared. For those who do not know me well, I
may appear to be a non stop complainer. That is why I try to space my negative release statements
with jokes. Over all I am a very contented if not down right happy person most of the time.

But if a person where to place too much importance on those momentary occasions of emotional releases they may overlook the
contradictory proof of the person I truly am.
They may think that those occasional releases
of emotion is more me then the me that stands before them. I am there in their view and then
gone. But the blog and postings remain. I do not know how to off set what was said then by the
reality of my physical presence or absence.
For that reason, I am going to delete the personal negative emotional release comments. Maybe I can find somewhere else to post where
adverse evaluations of my personality will not matter as much. I sure hope so, because I will miss the responses by loving and caring people here.
At the same time, I do want people to know the
real me as opposed to the limited one sided view they may assume to be the real me.
I will still try to supply jokes and maybe some sappy, positive romantic junk. Just wanted to give you all a heads up on what I am doing and why I am doing it.

Goldenhairgodess 63F
396 posts
9/1/2005 10:04 am

Well Tim;
With the people who blow up and slam doors and such-A person may
wittness it, but the memory fades in time. But if I write something
down and a person keeps going back to it over and over again, they
just get a distored view of me. If it is going to cost me in terms
of potential relationships, then it is just not worth it.

MsLoveRose 33F  
2432 posts
9/2/2005 1:46 pm

more often than a few times have i come across someone as having a one sided feeling about certain things...their perception about me did in fact have some sort of hold on how others were treating me but in the same breath their lack of understand and knowledge of who i really am just disabled themselves from ever seeing this true bueaty.... You have far better courage than i, golden...its not a matter of if they are right or wrong...because who can be a better you than yourself....somtimes its not meant for everyone to get or understand what you say....and since you choose to write and post your thoughts and feelings should get much more opposed to you just being "one sided" and only catering to what someone else might think its ok to do....

i dont even really know if i am understanding what you are saying (or myself for that matter)....for what its worth i have always admired you and your ability to speak your heart...speak your beliefs...and if someone just cant grasp that concept and write you off as this or that type of they arent as receptive to personal thoughts and understandings....well whatever your are who you are...the only person you can be!

live more, laugh often, love much

Goldenhairgodess 63F
396 posts
9/3/2005 5:26 pm

Thanks Sunrisegirl;
Frankly, when I wrote things, it was not for others to judge. They were welcome to disagree or agree and write back as they pleased. But
it never occured to me that they could get so hung up on it that it could obscure their vision of me once they met me face to face. So by removing that material I am hoping the memory will fade so I can be judged more by what I do, then by what I said a week or a month before they met me.

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