I Would NOT! ... or would i?  

Ghost_Kawasaki 30M
11 posts
12/24/2005 4:52 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

I Would NOT! ... or would i?

I was just thinking about what my horoscope said, and it lead me here. What would be my reaction if my ex asked me out again, wanting to renew the relationship? Would I be strong and tell her that what we had is over? Would I be strong and tell her that I want to start over? Would I be strong and tell her anything?

(here's a little background)
We were together for 2 years. She dumped me 5 months ago, over the phone when I was on a plane in Chicago. I was heading to start a job that would pay nicely, but require me to leave for a few weeks. The reason was she wasn't in love with me anymore, she will always love me, but something changed. She wouldn't tell me what the something was. I think it had a lot to do with the tension from not informing the other about what was bothering us. Just bottling everything up inside. I had let myself care very deeply about her, and this scarred my soul, and I went through a month or two of depression.

Now I am trying to expand my 'Single Life', to become a full-blown Bachelor. These are my College Years so now I'm getting out and "Livin' It Up", as you might say.

My horoscope was talking about not turning someone unexpected away. Even if you don't want to speak with them, keep an open mind. Grrrr.

I guess I'll just do this like I do everything else in life, wing it. I have found that this is my favorite way to deal with life. Everything works itself out in the end. The only thing I really have planned is my education. Beyond that, all I have are dreams. I've always liked the phrases "Dream Big" and "Reach For the Stars". Dreams of Love, Dreams of Happiness, Dreams of Family, Dreams even of Success and Wealth.

Without dreams to aspire to, what do we have to live for. When you reach one pateau, you notice another, up still higher. This is what drives me, at least. I dont plan on getting my dreams, plotting ways for me to get there, cartographing my path through life. I prefer a more open, care-free walk. I don't neglect my responsibilities, my bills or school. I don't know what I'm doing this weekend if it's Monday. Hehe, I hardly know what I'm doing on Saturday night when its Saturday afternoon.

Until Later Friends
Ghost >>!?* Kawasaki


Lonelywoman56 60F

12/24/2005 5:44 pm

I alway's liked " Life is good, Live it". You said you think you know what you did wrong so you learned something, That makes the pain worth it,next time don't do what didn't work. I always thought we lose people so the the next one is appreciated a little more. Maybe thats how we learn to love, of course I'm 49 and alone on Christmas Eve so maybe I am really, really wrong. Keep dreaming dude.


rdy2play1 40M  
15 posts
12/24/2005 6:28 pm

You seem like a complicated person with so much to say for being someone who doesn't enjoy ”crowds.“ And you seem much older than nineteen. That's not a bad thing by no means. This is my interpretation of your personna. I enjoyed reading all your blog postings. Your a handsome guy with a lot to offer. Your ex may not have appreciated that. By her ”breaking it off“ over the phone showed a weakness on her part. I believe she may still care if she couldn't do it in person. But I have a feeling there was someone else she was more interested in at the time. Do you happen to know if she is seeing someone else? Just wondering aloud so to speak. That is between you and her, what you had, what could still be. Don't ever regret it by no means. I'm sorry she scarred you. But, as they say, scars are reminders that yesterday did exist. I like your carefree ”take-it-as-it-comes“ approach. Thats an important lesson for many to learn from. All these people who take their lives too seriously and miss the special things life has to offer. Your a good guy and I wish you the best of luck. I can tell your destined for great things. Merry Christmas, by the way. And a Happy New Year too. Cheers, to a new beginning. I want to comment on your pics in your profile if I may. Keep doing the push-ups. Your stomach, arms, and abs really show your dedication and that is something you should be real proud of!! Trust me on this too, the ladies will fall in love with that ”treasure trail“ leading from your belly button down to ”better things.“ (oh one more thing, I have arachnophobia real bad...but I respect your ”appreciation“ of spiders and I really like your tatoo!Awesome motorcycle too!!!)


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