INDIANA GIRLS FOLLOW THE LINKS TO YOUR FREE LOBSTER DINNER
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Feb 16, 2012 3:50 pm
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WITH SO MANY PEOPLE OUT OF WORK...
Still no takers. Maybe I need to move to another state. If not another state of mind.
Truth is I did have a wonderful date last weekend, but she came from out of state just to meet me. Here is what I find disturbing. Having shared with her the following story.
A couple years ago I walked into a dive bar to drown my sorrows on the way home from the casino. I didn't have my glasses yet so when I thought I saw a naked lady walk in front of me I thought nothing of it. Walked up to the bar, ordered my favorite drink and spun around in my seat. Turns out I had just stumbled into an Adult FriendFinder meet and greet. Accidentally!
Everyone was naked there. And I gotta admit I didn't really care. I was curious about what would go on in here.
Soon though the bouncer asked me to leave. I turned to him and said "I am the great LoveHoochies". He looked at me and said "Exactly".
So I look some liberties. With my story. He actually kicked me out cause I didn't have an invitation.
But! 
I went to another bar and mentioned what I saw. And this is no exaggeration at all. If I had an open invitation and a mini van I coulda taken ten women to "the ball".
Why do so many women in Indiana have this fascination with public displays of nudity? To get away from that desire do I need to go back to church entirely? Or is church an even lonelier place in the age of free and sexy?
I mean seriously. Ladies. If a complete stranger invited you to a sex party.
Would you go? 
Really? 
The only happy ending I could find in this is that the owner soon after lost his liquor license.
Something about solicitation. 
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I CAN'T GO ON ANYMORE...I THINK I GOTTA JUST GO
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Dec 14, 2011 8:33 pm
2731 Views
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Highest divorce rate, STD rate and illegitimate baby rate in the last 20 years. That's all documented. Less scientific studies show open relationships are up too. Drug use, alcohol abuse and prostitution round out the zoo. I can come up with more if you give me a few.
I saw two movies yesterday. The first lifted my spirits. "Immortals". Good flick. Made me feel like I was a part of it.
The struggle of good versus evil. The bad guys being cut in half in 3-D animation. My own struggle against evil graphically illustrated.
Then I went home and saw "Friends With Benefits". And although the story had a happy ending. The first hour was beyond comprehending.
Teen heart throb Justin Timberlake. In a role he shouldn't have taken. Leaving American women fried like burnt bacon.
Because if this is what teen girls are watching there is no hope for us now. The echo boomers are what they are. And they are selling it to our children now.
It will take a magic bow. Or my God immortal. To change the show.
The best we as Christians can do is identify and distance ourselves from the problem. Vote to let it all go to hell in a hand basket. And give up our sexuality for Jesus.
Cause when you see this kind of sexual depravity repeating. Women doing things just to get even. That's when it's time for the innocent to be leaving.
It has gone too far. Sexual depravity has replaced love. For no good reason than popular culture.
A few big mouths ruining "the center" for the rest of us.
I need sex. But at this point it isn't worth it. The risks. Time to look for what comes next. I need love.
But as I leave. May I plead. That you read. My blog indeed. And decide if you are the girl to take my seed.
Because as hard as it is to admit. It is time to get married. For Jesus. Merry Christmas everybody. Hope you don't get a throat born STI under the mistletoe.
I know I won't. Won't be kissing anyone. Cause American women are still looking for something else.
Hope you find it safely. The odds are against you. But I wish you no ill will.
Tally ho and Godspeed to all of you. 
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ANYONE AROUND LAKE MICHIGAN LIKE TO EAT LOBSTER?
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Feb 22, 2012 10:47 am
47 Views
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Still looking for a date...
INDIANA GIRLS FOLLOW THE LINKS TO YOUR FREE LOBSTER DINNER
...for tomorrow evening.
I'm not sure why this has been so difficult. If a fat ugly chick asked me to a free lobster dinner I'd be in. So what's wrong with skinny bald guys?
Maybe it's not me. It's my writing. Maybe you think I'm a little bit crazy.
But here's the thing. I have a broken right arm. And I just threw my back out gardening. You have nothing to worry about. I am totally harmless.
So somebody ask me why I plant my beets in February.
Or better yet. Answer it. Let's make it a contest.
Want a free lobster dinner you have to earn it.
So why do I plant my beets in February?
First girl with the correct albeit silly answer wins the dinner. 
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THE UNHOLY TRINITY...FWB, BBC AND BISEXUALITY
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Feb 21, 2012 10:47 pm
201 Views
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You call me your friend and I call you mine. But to find what you seek you must leave those things behind. No it doesn't make the best pick up line.
But no three things have had a greater negative effect on my life. Yes I am your friend but you could never be my wife. I've been cuckolded by the devil for a half decades time.
So excuse me if I occasionally whine. Beaten to a pulp by women in these "free" times. What you have done to us should be a crime.
For you are not color blind. An FWB is a hooker in my Christian mind. A member of some man's harem if you call yourself "bi".
That's not what I call living with Christ. 
Accuse me of hypocrisy. But look in the mirror and have a see. You are not practicing Christianity. And I have to believe. Jesus actually has a plan for me.
For I may have sinned but I have never crossed into infidelity.
And I gotta believe that's more important.
I do love you baby. A friend indeed. But there are things on your blog that made me say "golly gee". Why the hell does this girl like reading. When my words so obviously disagree with your way of thinking.
One of us is sleeping with the devil. 
But only God can judge. Is it the man who holds a grudge. Or is it the woman who lives without love.
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A CHRISTIAN PERSPECTIVE ON MARDI GRAS
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Feb 21, 2012 9:50 am
129 Views
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The news stories are already piling in. But here's the thing. Since we have been living every day like it was Mardi Gras. Why do we even bother to celebrate it? It's just a little more of the same old shit.
Now I don't claim to be an expert. But to a Christian this is what Mardi Gras is. A great big release before 40 days without sin. Marking the beginning of the season that to us is known as Lenten. And I do believe I am right about this.
In a nation back then that was very Christian. It was also a release from living that life in general. A chance to cheat and put it behind you. Followed by 40 days to think about what you've done. Hopefully preventing you from doing it again next year.
That is actually where the masked tradition comes from. A week of debauchery was nothing to be proud of. Perhaps it is time we put the masks back on.
I just had a discussion with a friend and she said "7% of Americans swing but 70% of American men cheat". Now I have done neither so I don't agree with these numbers. Especially because since the year 2000 divorce records show that more women cheat than men. A case of supply and demand. But these numbers are also skewed I must admit.
Cause though women will often live with it most men have pride and won't put up with that shit.
Point is. Cheating is not the end of the world. If in the end you feel bad about it. And whether or not you agree with that. That there is the cold hard facts.
No it's not perfect. But it is more perfect than an open marriage. Cheating and psychologically beating your "loved one" every day you are together. Pardon the pun. Since you are not really together are ya?
So yes the links between Christianity are many. Catholicism is linked in too. And so is being Polish.
"The first of two FMF bisexual opportunities came next. I cursed the first pair and walked away. But by the time the second pair came some months later I was ready to give in to free sex. I mean, I am Polish and it was Dingas Day. Seemed like a go until the one girl saw the crucifix attached to the end of my beads and ran away screaming like a vampire."
And that's the problem. The links are gone. And so should be the holiday.
Unless us Christians were to celebrate it separately. I mean, I know I prefer people like me. And no woman should ever share her sexuality.
With heathens!
Back to the masks. I was discussing this with another friend last night. How the term FWB just doesn't seem right. We all have to live our life in these troubled times. Making concessions that are less than sublime.
But when we give something an acronym we give it credentials. Why not just call it "getting by"? Nothing to brag about to the people in our lives.
An FWB should remain a secret in our dirty little minds. Call it something else that doesn't have to rhyme. Do what you gotta do to survive.
But the next time someone asks you. "What's going on with you two?". Tell them you are "just friends" instead of saying "what's it to you?".
Put the mask back on. But put your best face forward. There's no need to tempt others into becoming a bunch of whor-ras.
Live your life like everyone else is your child. You wouldn't want your kid to hear you say "FWB". And if you don't want to be called a whore you should keep it from everybody.
Think real hard about this and let me know if you agree. Wasn't America a better place before we opened up our sexuality? We could all live together in peace and make the best of it.
And we could all have great sex. 
Even us Christian men.
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TURNED OFF THEN TURN OFF
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Feb 20, 2012 6:13 pm
123 Views
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Sometimes I feel like my job is done here. Been posting reruns cause I really don't have any new material. Plus I just don't get any positive feedback anymore.
"Nope, not at all, between what you said and several other things in the last couple of days, I took a long, hard look at the path I was on. My soul hurt, my heart hurt, I wasn't living right, I was on the wrong life path. I just wanted you to know that you had a part in changing someones life for the better, and to say thanks for speaking your mind, it helped me. Thank You. Cherry"
No more success stories like that one. And I used to get them. Oh at least one email every month.
Perhaps there is no one left here worth saving. Perhaps I have already saved everyone. Or perhaps those worth saving already left and it's time for me to go and start saving myself.
You know though. This place is the lesser of many evils. You know what to expect here. It's the things I see on TV. Or out there on the street that really disturb me.
Just recently. I can't believe some of the TV shows I've seen. Never mind the movies.
Our world is becoming totally obscene. 
It is enough to turn a man off on sex. If not send him over to the other side of the fence. Right now the "off" button is our only defense.
That's what comes next. For us Christians. Turn the damn thing off if it leans too far to the right or the left.
That's the only way to find the center again.
But we gotta do it together.
Really. Ladies. I get five days off a week. So even though it's not really me. Let me be your FWB.
I can't help that you want to be free.
Let's do some gardening. Camping or fishing. Cause this world can't hurt us if we can't see.
I just want to be free of everything mean. Like professional wrestling. Or politicians that should be confessing.
But you still want to go dancing. Listening to that music that comes between. Prevents you from ever really becoming a part of a man like me.
That's the thing about blank music. If parents didn't get divorced women wouldn't listen to it. Cause no man in his right mind would have it. And that's why we can't have you. Blank music makes you a ho if not a fool.
Turn that shit off and your problems will be few.
And that's the last piece of advice I have for you. 
Want a nice guy then start acting white. Then you can be a loving wife. Or you can be bisexual and share a man for life.
But settling for less than one just doesn't seem right.
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RON PAUL IS THE WRONG PAUL FOR PRESIDENT
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Feb 20, 2012 5:16 pm
108 Views
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I prefer this Paul. 
Women Must Have A Short Attention Span...
...because they can never seem to get past Paul's first paragraph.
22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Except swinging with single girls of course. 
25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church– 30for we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32This is a profound mystery–but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
So what is it about this reading that has sent so many of you ladies running to the devil?
Sincerely,
Today Es Listening
ps Personally I think it's a beautiful thing. The very definition of marriage even. And it doesn't say a thing about buying a hot tub and keeping a bisexual harem.
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THE WAY BACK MACHINE...BACK IN TIME BEFORE THE RHYME
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Feb 17, 2012 10:02 am
270 Views
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I wasn't always crazy. The sexually liberated women's movement drove me to it. See for yourself if you don't believe me.
And comment below if you want me to find a post of your own.
I will bring it to you here because I still love you I swear.
Or if you are just feeling silly then please answer this question for me.
If there was a drink called "A Cougar On The Rocks" what would be in it?
Cougar Season Is Over... The Final Word
And I so appreciate that if you lived closer there was a time anyways where we would have been friends. As much as we talk I see you as one right now. But the fact is that in most cougar situations the man will always either see you as a bonus prize in addition to his girlfriend or a consolation prize when he can't find one.
I don't see how you can gain any gratification from that. If a forty year old man hits on a 20 year old bleach blond tanned and fake titted bimbo and she says yes to a date give him Kudos for beating 1 in 100 odds. What are the odds that a horny 20 year old man will say yes to a decent looking 40 year old woman? 99 in 100? I don't see how cougars can take any pride at all being used for sex by a younger man.
And don't say you are using them for sex too so it's ok. That statement just looks so bad on you girls (in general). From day one I have always looked to women for companionship over sex. Yes I love sex and have been in situations where I wanted to trade up for a sexier (but not always younger) model. But without the promise of good companionship I have never acted on those desires.
I am proud of the fact that I have never cheated. I am proud also of the fact that at least in my 20's I was able to leave every woman I was ever with a friend. But over the last 10 years girls have really started acting like idiots.
And maybe it is the man's fault. I watched a young guy at the clinic come out to his GF and totally dis her the other day. She had just done her make up and lipstick for him and he just smacked her down. Called her a nasty hoe in public and told her to "Get away from me with that shit." Now maybe that was his way of saying "I love you but you look better without make up baby" but I highly doubt it. She was gorgeous...he looked like the guy from the early Offspring videos. And she actually threw his arms around him and he dragged her away behind him while she was trying to show him affection.
So you girls wanna cougar. You wanna listen to and hip hop because it makes you feel young. But if you would just act your own age you might find a guy that isn't an asshole.
Instead of punishing those of us that are not assholes with your actions.
I do sound like an asshole on my blog sometimes, but if you read between the lines you know by now it's really tough love.
Sincerely,
Catch E. Release
Hoochies Most Scandalous Woman Contest...
I've given up on finding a nice girl. Not just on this site. Anywhere in the world as far as that goes.
So I guess if you can't beat em join em. I am actually looking for someone who can top the last three. You will be judged on vulgarity, originality and humor.
Because after all that I've been through I promise I will split my side laughing the next time a girl gets one over on me.
Anywho...here's what you're up against.
***I caught my date giving a hand job to some guy in my car just as he was blowing his nut on my dashboard...at my company Christmas Party in fact.
***Girl I asked steady on the 20th posted pictures of herself with another guys dick in her mouth dated the 23rd...and I found those on Christmas Eve.
***At the end of my rope a girl drags me into the bathroom at a tavern and fucks my brains out...but afterwords won't even talk to me cause she is at the bar with were fully lesbian lover.
Now keep in mind that "the no show" is not very original and not very environmentally friendly either. Especially if I drive 100 miles to meet you and you're not there. Been there, done that and definitely not contest winning material.
Use your imagination ladies. Your reward? Well just knowing that you are the most scandalous woman in my life should be reward enough.
Sincerely,
Hit E. Back
ps So what is the meanest thing you have ever done to a guy?
I'm Going To Get A Job With The CDC!
I had a recent clap scare that turned out to be nothing. But I learned some things. Did you know that if you get Gonorrhea the CDC goes back to all your partners and their partners until they can't trace the disease any further?
Yeah you can take the church out of the state but you can't take the church out of the man. What a fucking tool this is to destroy the marriages of cheating ass men. So maybe a government agency can no longer have a secondary mission to uphold the moral values of the Christian religion, but I sure fuckin can.
I will revel in that call to the wife of the infected adulterous fucker. I will glow with accomplishment every time I get a hooker cleaned up and off the streets. I will take the ultimate pride in the fact that I am one man saving the America that I grew up in.
You think you will just lie about your partners? It's all on the web sites server. If not I'll seize your computer and get what I need off your hard drive. If I'm gonna work 50 hours a week anyways I might as well be doing something I believe in. And that's nailing married fucking men to the wall that cheat on their wives.
And I'm serious about all this. I have blogged and blogged about everything I hate about the world and never could figure out what I could do to change it. This is fuckin it!
Either that or I could get a job with the IRS and bust swingers for taking the tax exemption for married people...I mean, come on...you people ain't married.
Not in gods eyes...not in my eyes...not in your own eyes.
Sincerely,
Figur Eng Thingsout
ps Be afraid be very afraid...Hoochies is coming for you LOL.
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