More about me. Kat that is.  

Frnds4Play 53M/63F
2686 posts
10/21/2005 8:38 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

More about me. Kat that is.

Like I said in the last post, my mother never drank before noon, but that didn't stop her from drinking into the we hours of the morning, before she passed out.

I don't remember details of my childhood. Just odds and ends here and there and I can never be sure if they are memories or stories people have told me.

I had a long time girlfriend a year older than me who's parents were friends of my parents. She has told me many things that happened and what my mother did or said to me. That's the only way I knew what really went on. Do I need to know at this late date in my life? I don't think so.

I do have good memories of times when I wasn't at home or when my mother was at work. In the summer I would spend my days at the beach, which was a couple of miles from my house. The only problem with where I lived was that we had to walk to the beach. That wasn't the problem because going was all down hill, coming home when your worn out from a day swimming and suning at the beach is another story. It felt like I had to walk 10 miles instead of just a couple, all up hill. If I wasn't at the beach I was at the stables in Palos Verdes, about 5 miles from my house. I also walked there and home. I loved my days with the horses. They have always given me pleasure, even when they would throw me, or bite me, or step on my foot, the peace they gave me outweighed the bad.

My parents knew of my love for horses of course, so they did everything they could to give me a life with them other than buying one for me. I joined drill teams, took lessons in western, then English, then hunter classes. They took me to horse shows and rodeo's. We also went to circuses every year, and the Ice Capades.

When I was older we went to the Ballet and saw Swan Lake, we went to zoo's and theatre shows. So I wasn't deprived of things, just of a happy normal childhood. Those are the things I remember, not the abuse that I know took place.

I can remember my sister and I getting spanked. Sent to bed with out dinner, if we were out to dinner and misbehaved at the table then we were sent to the car to wait, without eating.

I can remember my sister and I getting our heads banged together, for what I don't know, also spanked with a belt, hair brushes were used on us and we spent a lot of time without dinner in our room. My sister and I shared a room. I was lucky enough to have a small walk in closet, and that's where I spent a great deal of my time when I was at home. It was my safe place. I remember besides my clothes it had a trunk in it and I kept my toys in there, so it was very homey to me.

When the whole family got together for holidays and special occasions it was bad. Not at the beginning but by the time we ate my mom would be real drunk. I usually ate quietly and held my head down so no attention would be brought to me. My sister was just the opposite, out spoken, ate with her head held high and usually got in trouble. She is three years older than I am. Every Christmas she would take whatever toy or watch of hers or mine apart and never be able to get them back together again. Which of course got her in trouble. But opening presents came early in the morning and my mother wasn't drunk yet so that was a nice time.

My dad was a super man. Very quiet, like me. He would spend the whole year before Christmas and birthdays finding special things. It was none of that last minute stuff that so many parents do. We always had one or two toys that had taken a long time to find from him. He also was the major cook in the family. He loved trying out new recipes. Some of which were pretty bad though.

Too be continued.

Take care all


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