"Lights will guide you home"  

Fallic40 53M
3214 posts
12/11/2005 8:14 pm
"Lights will guide you home"

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

Coldplay "Fix You"

Last night, I went to my first social event in 2 months. I went to the annual Christmas dinner and dance thrown by several long time friends. Since I am a total bachelor boy right now, I talked my oldest daughter into going with me since she would know everyone there.

That all being arranged, I got all ponced up in black Armani. It was hanging a bit but with a royal blue shirt and black and silver striped tie, I was still dressed to the nines.

We got down to the hall that had been rented for the event and sat down at a table with several long time friends. One of those friends was the bass player in the band that was playing that evening. He wanted to know if I was still playing guitar and piano? "Yes." Did I know any of the songs on their playlist? "Yes." Would i sit in with the band on a song? "Maybe."

Nothing much happened through dinner and lots of people came over to see how I was doing now. About 30 minutes after dinner, my daughter walked up to me and told me that she had told the band that I would sit in with them for a song and she had even chosen the song. I would do Colplay's "Fix You" since we play it all the time at home. I was told to consider it an early birthday present for her (she turns 16 on Monday).

Midway through the first set, I warmed up my voice and tried to loosen up my fingers. I went out onto the stage and sat at the battered, old upright that the band has. I saw all the friends who had visited me in the hospital watching, there were other friends who called every day and other friends who had brought meals over or given me a ride when I wasn't able to drive. All were watching to see how I was doing.

My fingers were very stiff and my voice was hesitant at first. But much sooner than I expected, the fingers became loose and my voice gained some strength and resonance. The song was going great until the bridge.

The bridge in this song is a very simple but haunting and plaintive guitar solo. My daughter walked on stage with a borrowed Gibson and sat down on the piano bench with me and delivered the solo perfectly and with a lot of soul.

As we worked through the song, I looked over at the bass player, he was crying. He came over and kissed the top of my daughter's head. Then he kissed the top of my head. After that I do not remember too much until the last organ notes faded out. My friends had guided me home and they had fixed me.

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I .....

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Synn74 42F
1206 posts
12/12/2005 6:07 pm

truly beautiful Fallic thank you for sharing

I welcome you to the House of Syn...

missy973 47F

12/12/2005 8:59 pm

Very sweet.

Fallic40 53M
1858 posts
12/15/2005 8:17 pm

scarlettsflame, my father actually said the reverse. He felt that because she is such a great girl, she created a good father. For me being a dad and a father is easy becuase I am still a big kid at heart.

I will be posting about why the two of us are so close at some point in the future.

impish_pixie 54F
6867 posts
12/16/2005 2:41 pm

You've given your daughter the perfect example of a good man. When she falls in love you can be sure all men will be judged by you. It's so beautiful to see a father this way, know that you are one among few. I was blessed in the same way - it's an uncomparable gift to be loved by your father.

I make mistakes, I am out of control & at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. ~Marilyn

Fallic40 53M
1858 posts
12/19/2005 8:03 pm

impish pixie, welcome to the diary.

trust me when I say that I am far from being a perfect example of a good man. But I do work very hard on being a good father.

(Princess Lips)

12/20/2005 10:17 am

love the song...

and loved this!



Fallic40 53M
1858 posts
3/20/2006 1:27 pm

synn74, it was a wonderful evening all around.

Fallic40 53M
1858 posts
3/20/2006 1:28 pm

missy, thank you very much

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