|Blogs > DragonPack > Lizard Lust|
Fakes -- the other white meat
Fakes -- the other white meat
Anyone remember the 2003 McDonald's ad campaign? Chicken McNuggets -- now with all white meat.
Makes one wonder (or better not...) what they put in before.
Just the question you should ask yourself with quite a number of "females" on here. Ok, most fakes you discover rather quickly as their acting is rather poor.
You want to improve your faking skills? Then let's go for the Top 10 Mistakes in Faking:
(10) Don't overdo it.
People here do have some experience. With life. With sex. Pretending to be everyone's wet dream is a bit ... stupid, don't you think?
So next time you plan to claim to be a gorgeous-looking nymphomanic bi-sexual babe in her early 20s who will happily travel several hundred (if not thousand...) miles for meeting some perfect strangers and even have a younger yet even hornier sister who also wants to join in, just have a walk in the park: you obviously need a reality check.
(If you, however, get gangbanged by a group of gorgeous-looking nymphomanic bi-sexual babes in their early 20s while walking in the park, pass on the GPS coordinates! Quick!)
(9) Stealing Photos
This is a swinger site. People love sex. What makes you think people on here don't know at least some of the sex sites you decided to milk for photos?
Oh, and again: don't overdo it. It's rather unlikely that this gorgeous-looking nymphomanic bi-sexual babe has a vast collection of amateur porn shoots which not only reveal her face on each and every pic, but also showing her in positions you wouldn't dare to ask a hardcore-porn star while having professional shooting written in big blinking letters on it.
Take a walk in the park. Really.
Oh, and do some amateur shootings. Aperture. Exposure time. Shadows. Sharpness.
(8 ) Photo backgrounds
Ever noticed that certain things differ around the world? So, please, don't insult anyone's intelligence by e.g. claiming that a photo shows you at home in good old Europe where we can clearly see US-style power outlets or the typical door knobs.
(7) There's something about ... Cameras
Cameras and picture processing software like to leave traces of information in your pictures. You might not know where to look for what. But be damn sure that some of us do. So next time you claim that the picture you just sent was taken yesterday, make sure that the picture doesn't tell a different story.
(6) Photo reuse
So you managed to find a photo which doesn't reveal itself as fake at first glance. To have at least initial success, make sure that your photo isn't already present in another account. And no, don't count on the fact that people only browse locally.
(5) Picture Collectors
The easiest way to identify yourself as a fake is demanding tons of pictures. If you're interested in meeting someone, then a few pictures should be enough to check whether the physical parameters match what you seek for. If it's just amateur porn you're after, there are other sites for that.
(4) ...but I can't see your face!
Usually the best way to disclose yourself as a fake. While we do hand out face pics, we only do so after a successful phone check. So don't ask this question, if you aren't ready for, yes, a phone check.
(3) Avoiding phone checks
There was a time when people didn't want to hand out phone numbers -- for obvious reasons. But in the Year 2006 almost everyone owns more than one cell phone (especially in Europe). So if you're serious with all this dating stuff, just keep your old phone, put in a calling card, and be ready for a first phone contact without having to fear eternal prank calls and molestors on your precious main number.
(2) Only be able to text-message
So you did keep your old mobile and happily spread the number. Too bad you can only be reached via text messaging and whenever one tries to call you they get the provider-provided (ha!) message box.
(1) Not appearing for scheduled meetings
Congratulations. You made it this far and tricked some kinky chatters into a live meeting. You arranged to meet them on neutral ground for a first live contact, be it a cafe (for the more innocent ones) or a swinger club (for the horny crowd). Or you even dared to visit them at home (because we all know, that all real women like to date strangers there...).
The worst you can do now is to not appear. Sure, there are cases where you have to cancel a meeting. You exchanged phone numbers. Chat handles. E-mail addresses.
But just not appearing will ultimately ruin all the hard work you put into your legend.
6/13/2006 2:17 pm
Great blog! Well, actually this is an exceptional blog. Is there any reason you have not submitted this to a magazine for publication? I think it is that good (both the thoughts and your ability to express them).
6/18/2006 11:47 am
Schön, dass ihr euer Blog nicht in deutsch verfasst. Da bleibt mir wenigstens die Hoffnung dass die Fake-Experten im deutschsprachigen Raum keine Lust auf Englisch haben (gut ich gebe es zu ich hab im Moment auch keine Lust mir meine Kommentierung auf Englisch abzuringen ). Sonst müsste ich mich demnächst auf eine Welle gut gemachter Fake-Profile einstellen . Ist auch so schon nervig genug.|