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I wish to announce the formation of the Labia Licker Guild. In the face of ever declining quality in the field of cunnilingus, this organization seeks to expand and improve rug munching around the world.
With the aging Salivating Snatch Guild now defunct, the Labia Licker Guild wishes to take this fine and proud profession into the twenty-first century.
Alas much of the wisdom of the ages has been lost to time. It is therefore one of the goals of the Labia Licker Guild to invest much of our efforts into research and development to insure a breathless reception.
Unlike our predecessors, we of the Labia Licker Guild encourage the membership of women into this organization. We are quite confident that without the input of our female members, no tungs will wag.
Membership will depend on a small fee and the willingness to spread the word of the Guild's goals. (Note: the word for today is Legs. Updates will follow.)
Membership includes extensive training and certification. Specialist fields will be offered including: Journeyman Labia Licker, Mound Muncher, Pubic Polishing Specialist, Clit Clapper, G-Spot Ranger, Taint Tickler, Bush Buster, Butterfly Specialist, Ass Rimmer, and Brush Hog.
With effort and continued study, the Labia Licker Guild will award master status to those exhibiting profound excellence. Journeyman status can improve to Master certification, all the way to the accolade of Grand Master Journeyman (much coveted for its howling reputation.)
Not to be confused with the Fabulous Fraternity of Fellatio. We of the Labia Licker Guild are dedicated to proposition of pleasing pussy in all it's splendid forms.
Along with our sister agency the Sisterhood of Dong Dippers (Note: this organization recently experienced a loss. The need exists to fill the head position,) we of the Labia Licker Guild are committed to the propagation of our trade by word of mouth or by going down on the... (Ahem! excuse me!) ...TO the individual. We are confident our quest for quality cunnilingus will be on the tungs of many for years to come.
With that in mind, the Labia Licker Guild will be accepting resumes to be reviewed by the Guild. References will be rigorously questioned.
The Sisterhood of Dong Dippers will be consulted for all prospective candidates. When the Sisterhood manages to fill the position of Headmistress, the Guild will announce it accordingly.
Alright everybody. I'm somewhat serious here. What I want is a similar announcement for the Sisterhood of Dong Dippers. Feel free to change the name of the organization, but put the change in your post. Like: "With the recent upheaval in the upper echelon of the Sisterhood of Dong Dippers, we are proud to announce the formation of the National Wang Whipper Administration." Or something like that.
OFFICIAL RELEASE FROM THE LABIA LICKER GUILD.
"So that tungs may wag."
7/3/2006 10:30 pm
ME , ME , ME |
PICK ME PLEASE . I STILL HAVE A LOT OF GETTING EATEN OUT TO MAKE UP FOR - LAMO ...
Only been separated and divorced for almost 2 yrs. and no , really didn't play around on my ex the last 14 yrs of our marriage - so still went without being eaten out since Dec 1984..
"GOOD LUCK - HUGS AND KISSES , LINDA "
7/4/2006 10:27 am
Alright Linda! The Sisterhood of Dong Dippers is in desperate need of a Headmistress and they complain that their accolades are beginning to shrivel. With proper leadership and artistry the Sisterhood informs the Guild standing ovations will be the order of the day. Praise will erupt from many a happy man and shower the one with the vision (and lack of tonsils so I'm told) to pull this respected and much adored position from ruin.|
Once revered as the single authority of blow jobs, it has seen a decline in recent years as cheaper membership offered by the Hummer Hegemony and the Federal Fluffer Union has gained appeal.
Confronted with these formidable challenges, are you, Linda, prepared to do whatever it takes to gag your competition and restore the Sisterhood of Dong Dippers to the preeminence it once enjoyed?
If so the Labia Licker Guild is fully prepared to stand behind you (hell wherever you say) in your efforts to bring the Sisterhood of Dong Dippers back on top (or bottom, or more accurately 69.)