Turning the corner  

Djarid 46M
1 posts
9/2/2005 3:35 am

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Turning the corner


Welcome to my ramblings. I intend to meander through my thoughts and feelings here as I explore my new liberated outlook on life. Hopefully this will give me focus and allow you an insight into me as a person.

Why am I here and where am I going?
Now that is a question I am trying to answer myself; I have been separated for a little over a year and decided to get my life on track. Living near london and spending too much time working, I quickly realised that it is very difficult to meet people and so started looking at online dating as a solution.

While looking at personals I followed links to various blogs which in turn lead me on a merry paper chase finishing at AdultFriendFinder. I was intrigued and not a little apprehensive but in keeping with my resolution to get out there and not be a wuss I joined up.

5 days ago I began this odessey and the ride has been emotional. Let me explain:
I am a confident guy and not unattractive, I have a commanding presence and get noticed. However I say all this with the following caveat... I've all the confidence in the world in just about every situation except when it comes to wooing the opposite sex. So I made a resolution to throw caution to the wind, embrace my fears and rush into any experiences that may be offered. I have been sending messages to women who have sparked my interest and as is my style I have been trying to woo them, no coarse or crass approaches for me. Even for a one night stand I need to have an emotional bond, the pure mechanics of sex aren't enough for me. Meandered away from my point there; I have been very successful so far, not necessarily with the response I have receive, of which I am happy, but rather with my ability to overcome my fears and inhibitions.

This all culminated with my decision to attend a swinger's party on saturday night. I have no idea what it will be like, I have had butterflies about the experience constantly but this in itself is a thrill which I am embracing instead of shying away from. In fact when I think about it I have had this thrill since joining and have never had such a high sex drive.

Ah well that is all from me for now. I will post my thoughts on sunday after the party.

take care all.

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