What I have learned from watching PORN ...  

DizzyKittie81 35F
512 posts
8/15/2006 2:00 pm

Last Read:
9/7/2006 4:36 am

What I have learned from watching PORN ...




1. Women wear high heels to bed.

2. Men are never impotent.

3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than
satisfactory.

4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.

5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with cum.

6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly, middle-aged men.

7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blowjob.

8. Women always orgasm when men do.

9. A blowjob will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.

10. All women are noisy fucks.

11. People in the 70s couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar
solo in the background.

12. Those tits are real.

13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take
his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.

14. Men always groan "OH YEAH!" when they cum.

15. If there are two of them they "high five" each other. (and the
girl isn't disgusted!)

16. Double penetration makes women smile.

17. Asian men don't exist.

18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the
bushes, the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of
you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.

19. There's a plot.

20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a
woman by giving her a gentle slap on the butt.

21. Nurses suck patient's cocks.

22. Men always pull out.

23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best
friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking the
both of you.

24. Women never have headaches... or periods.

25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him
to remind her to "suck it".

26. Assholes are clean.

27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for
all parties concerned.

28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a
man's trousers and find a cock there.

29. Men don't have to beg.

30. When standing during a blowjob, a man will always place one
hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip.


So... what has PORN taught YOU?

buddhamike 105M
7006 posts
8/15/2006 2:18 pm

It has taught me that some people will do almost anything for money, and others will pay almost anything to watch.


DiscreetFtWayne 37M
106 posts
8/15/2006 2:23 pm

All women insist on doggiestyle at some point during the encounter.

Secretaries are always gorgeous with huge boobs that want to fuck like there's no tomorrow and would never consider suing over it.

Space aliens are actually women with huge tits who want to fuck us to death to make is comply with their wish's

Everyone woman enjoys at least one cock in her ass.

All women are bisexual

Men don't wear underware

Women all wear thongs, or some sort of lingere from Victoria's Secret

All women can do the splits standing up while having sex

Police routinely engage in sex with their witnesses

That's all I got for now... lol good list though


TabithaElectra 37F

8/15/2006 2:23 pm

Great list!


dandy6912000 60M/59F
3383 posts
8/15/2006 2:23 pm

Sometime you can play them forward or backward and almost get the same results .lol. only they create more luaghs. but if it still float some one boat, maybe there still some hope, have a great day Dandy & Snatch


Wordsmith2004 36M
7233 posts
8/15/2006 5:01 pm

That the majority of the women of the world are blonde.

That only men who are over 6'0 and have perfect abs and huge cocks...or carney freak guys... get laid

that all African-American men can only get fucked by women if they're wearing some sort of ridiculous outfit (pimp suit, bushman tribal leopard skins, a Zorro cape and mask)

ALL women prefer African American men... or hairy lil'dudes (at least in stature) who look like the guy from the Super Mario Bros Supershow and are nicknamed "The Hedgehog"

That a man MUST make his cum shoot out of his dick like a bullet EVERY single time he has sex...only girly men "spill out champagne style" even once. Bonus points are awarded if he can hit her face from a distance, or even make it go over her face in an arch shot and land in her hair.

ALL women are bisexual and have girl-girl orgies with their female friends on a regular basis.

The only reason any woman lays out in a bathing suit by a pool or at the beach is for the soul purpose of finding some stranger to put lotion on her bare titties....and then to fuck her.

All older women are looking for younger buffneck studs... but will only fuck if he is a friend of her son.

All pizza delivery guys and pool boys have huge cocks

All rich wives are beautiful vivacious sex goddesses that can do absolutely ANYTHING sexually...and more than once a day, everyday!

Apparently it is common office dress code for a male executive or doctor to have frosted blond spikey hair, or a long headbanger head of hair, a soul patch or billygoat beard, and/or multiple visible piercings

Most women in this world have pierced clits and/or nipples

Brunettes are all mostly either spoiled preppie girls or goths, redheads are all eveel and into S/M and blondes are all optimistically stupid and would fuck just about anything as long as it has a big enough dick!

funny stuff!!

Conserve Water and Prevent Global Warming: Shower With A MILF!


Wordsmith2004 36M
7233 posts
8/15/2006 5:03 pm

That the majority of the women of the world are blonde.

That only men who are over 6'0 and have perfect abs and huge cocks...or carney freak guys... get laid

that all African-American men can only get fucked by women if they're wearing some sort of ridiculous outfit (pimp suit, bushman tribal leopard skins, a Zorro cape and mask)

ALL women prefer African American men... or hairy lil'dudes (at least in stature) who look like the guy from the Super Mario Bros Supershow and are nicknamed "The Hedgehog"

That a man MUST make his cum shoot out of his dick like a bullet EVERY single time he has sex...only girly men "spill out champagne style" even once. Bonus points are awarded if he can hit her face from a distance, or even make it go over her face in an arch shot and land in her hair.

ALL women are bisexual and have girl-girl orgies with their female friends on a regular basis.

The only reason any woman lays out in a bathing suit by a pool or at the beach is for the soul purpose of finding some stranger to put lotion on her bare titties....and then to fuck her.

All older women are looking for younger buffneck studs... but will only fuck if he is a friend of her son.

All pizza delivery guys and pool boys have huge cocks

All rich wives are beautiful vivacious sex goddesses that can do absolutely ANYTHING sexually...and more than once a day, everyday!

Apparently it is common office dress code for a male executive or doctor to have frosted blond spikey hair, or a long headbanger head of hair, a soul patch or billygoat beard, and/or multiple visible piercings

Most women have pierced clits and/or nipples

Brunettes are all mostly either spoiled preppie girls or goths, redheads are all eveel and into S/M and blondes are all optimistically stupid and would fuck just about anything as long as it has a big enough dick!

LOL funny stuff!!

Conserve Water and Prevent Global Warming: Shower With A MILF!


bigandtallreturn 37M

8/16/2006 4:12 am

Hey, I LIVE by #22. "Pull our before it cums out" is my motto.

Everything I learned, you guys already went over, so I have nothing to add.

"Today may be the first day of the rest of your life, unless you live on the other side of the International Date Line, then yesterday was the first day of the rest of your life."- Larry Andersen


bustybettyboop 50F  
59325 posts
8/16/2006 9:43 pm

lmao...loved it!!!

..just join me on my blog bustybettyboop and still looking for some hot,sexy,creative contestants for my next contest...come join us! need a blog mentor or want to be one?


timberwolf6972 44M

8/17/2006 4:37 am

It's taught me that ugly bastards like Ron Jeremy can get laid by hot chics, even if it's just in a movie! {=}


Medusa231968 48F
301 posts
8/20/2006 11:24 am

LOL, let's see the things I learned are.....

1. How to strip without shifting my bra to the front to unhook it.
2. How to get 3 men off ,so they all shoot their load at the same exact moment
3. How to eat pussy like a true muffdiver and get her off in 1 minute!
4. How to do this..... bends forward, tilts head back and touches toes ... by watching Ginger Lynn

Medusa


marathonman45202 53M
6640 posts
8/28/2006 2:09 pm

I've learned that men and women who give blowjobs love getting their faces jack-hammered. And that the men face-fucking the poor bastards only know how to say, "Yeah, suck my big cock" while they're getting blown.


DiscreetFtWayne 37M
106 posts
9/6/2006 1:51 pm

Every officer who is charged to protect someone in witness security gets to fuck the witness, and she wants it.

Every police officer and felon gets to fuck the witness at least once before the felon is arrested.

If your having sex it's impossible for you to notice the people in the same room as you who are "secretly watching" you.

If you tape someone having sex, then show them, they will have sex with you because it makes them hot.

20 yr old women love fucking 50 yr old men.

Every private detective is either a smoking hot chic, or ripped guy with a huge cock.

Every limo ride has sex involved


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