Meeting Someone From AFF...  

Divinitydesires 46F
4872 posts
1/21/2006 12:54 pm

Last Read:
3/5/2006 9:27 pm

Meeting Someone From AFF...

Here I am on a Saturday afternoon wondering what would happen if I actually ever met up with someone. Okay... honesty time... I have met up with someone... the meeting lasted two minutes and he walked away from me telling me he felt uncomfortable. WTF? What did I do? I swear to you I did nothing... I told him that it was good to see him and gave him a hug. It must have been the no sex on the first date rule, didn't think he could handle going without. *sighs* Rules!

Anyways, I came back here to my computer and told an online friend what happen and he ripped into me. NEVER... and I mean NEVER meet someone in a parking lot. How am I suppose to know that? Well he directed me to the main page of AdultFriendFinder to a link called 'online safety'. On that link there's some really good advice on what to do to keep safe, for both men and women.

From AdultFriendFinder...

Going Offline for a Meeting...Safety First

1) Once you've agreed to meet face to face, don't ask the other person to pick you up. Get yourself to and from the date, even if you have to beg a ride off of a friend or take a taxi. beg for a ride? Beg? Never! I'll walk instead.

2) Before you go, make sure that several friends and family members know where you're going, who you're going with and when to expect you back. Make sure everyone writes down the information so that there are no misunderstandings. Also, let them know where you found this person. Yes that means letting them know you're on AdultFriendFinder and what the handle is of the other person.

3) Always meet in a public place. A public place does not mean a parking lot - they are not monitored closely enough to be considered safe. Make your first meeting a lunch or coffee date. If the sparks don't fly, it's much easier to say that you have a meeting or some other commitment that requires you to end the date prematurely. opps... I messed this one up big time!

4) Stay in a public place. If they pressure you to go elsewhere, say NO. If they pressure you, they obviously don't care about your feelings - don't spare their feelings. End the meeting and leave. If they start to follow you to where you've parked, stop and hail a cab. Come back later for your car with a friend or family member. Good advice!

5) If possible, bring a cellular phone. If you need help or feel a little nervous, excuse yourself to the bathroom and call for back up! Put together an instant, "accidental" meeting with a friend. They're also good for emergencies or in case you think your online love is an offline stalker who's following you home. Use the cellular phone to call the police - just don't head back home. Keep the person far from there. Drive to a police station if you feel it's necessary. Or just have a friend accidentally meet up with you so they can take note of who your with. So later on you can see if they worthy of you are not... that's bad!

6) Never leave your personal belongings unattended. A purse or wallet contains all of your personal information. In your jacket pocket could be your keys. Just don't take the risk. I'm good on this one.

7) Do not leave your beverage unattended. If you do, nonchalantly ask for another drink. Date Drug People!

Stick with non-alcoholic drinks. Being drunk is not a good way to be safe. I don't drink... so this is easy.

9) If all goes well, set-up another date before the first one comes to an end. Use your best judgment and gut instincts to determine whether or not the other person is worthy of a second date. Be sure that this second date (and any others thereafter) incorporates all of these safety tips. You're worth the effort! If the other person truly cares about you, they'd expect nothing less.
I just need a date that will last more than two minutes. I swear people, I didn't have BO either. And he did look scared as hell, which made me nervous, even MORE!

So... my question to all of you...
Have you met up with someone from AdultFriendFinder before? Has the site worked for you? Was it a good or bad encounter?

caressmewell 53F

1/21/2006 7:29 pm

Thus far all of my encounters (except those that are only friendship based) have been awful. I no longer have any exceptations.

Uninhibited1972 44M

1/21/2006 7:44 pm

I think it would be reasonable to ask the person you are meeting if they would mind having the waiter take a picture of you two, posing. This would document an image of the person you met, but other information such as real names and contact information can be handled separately.

Eventually, I may check out the weekly, local meet & greet. I'll let you know how it goes, but would be at least a month out, if at all.

Uninhibited1972 44M

1/21/2006 7:46 pm

Oh crap, disregard. You should already have a picture before going, if it doesn't match, run like hell.

rm_CalyTaz 43M

1/21/2006 10:19 pm

I haven't met anyone yet. I'm open to the idea but, I agree you should be safe about it. Especially you ladies, there are a lot of crazy's out there. There are so many people that think just because they have chatted with you or answered some post that they know you. I don't think you ever really know someone until you've met them and have spent some time together. Just because everyone talks about sex on this site doesn't mean they want to meet you at a hotel. I know I would never want to meet someone that way. It's nice to get to know someone first before I find out how you taste.

elysianpleasure 47M

1/21/2006 11:23 pm

So far I haven't met anyone from AdultFriendFinder in person, although i am starting to make a few friends in blogland. So, yes, the site has been worth while to me.

This is actually pretty sound advice.

Georgie007777 67M
419 posts
1/22/2006 12:57 am

My story

Met my real Lady J on AdultFriendFinder two years ago.

After 6 weeks of gentle accelerated sharing of stuff with e-mails and then cell-phone we agreed to meet - in a safe location - she had asked me to book a bedroom - so I had - the room had flowers in it - roses - and champagne ready.

We met in the carpark of the small hotel right in front of reception.

We shook hands!

We went inside - we kissed - she said "Sorry" she couldn't go any further because she was feeling guilty about being unfaithful to her husband even though he wasn't interested in her and probably had a mistress.

We left - champagne un-drunk - bed unrumpled.

I continued to chat and woo her over the following weeks.

She asked to meet again

She did - you can read the account in Mzhunyhole's blog called "Are Ya Naked" 14-Jan 2006

So "If at first you don't succeed - Try and Try and Try again! - but always safely"

Sir Georgie

jakblack36 48M

1/22/2006 10:07 am

DD those are some good rules and guidelines. However, I think your judging AdultFriendFinder members like we are all perverts which many of us are I think other dating sites are as dangerous or more dangerous. At least if people are on AdultFriendFinder saying they are here to fuck, it's not a hidden thing.

I have met a few woman from AdultFriendFinder and have had very good experiences and very bad experiences. Good not being some fucked others didn't. No matter what forum AdultFriendFinder yahoooo or match your not going to have chemistry with everyone.

My advice, come to IL

rectal_reamer 54M

1/22/2006 10:21 am

LMAO.......YOU'RE AN IDIOT.............LMAO

bigandtallreturn 37M

1/22/2006 7:35 pm

Well, the first time I met my AF from here, we had great sex. And the sex has only gotten better.

So I guess it's different for everyone.

Don't give up, Div. You're a woman beyond compare, and the man who does wins your heart will be so lucky, he'll be shitting Lucky Charms. You're that special.

"Today may be the first day of the rest of your life, unless you live on the other side of the International Date Line, then yesterday was the first day of the rest of your life."- Larry Andersen

PassionKisses4Me 44F

1/23/2006 3:50 am

I have met 5 men on here...First one didn't look anything like his photo...that lasted about 5 minutes lol...2 where nice but not what I wanted...1 is a great friend...and the last has resulted in some very good compnay and great sex...keep hope sweetie, you will find the right one and when you do, he will be the luckiest man alive!!!



GoddessOfTheDawn 105F
11238 posts
1/23/2006 4:41 am

yes, yes and both ....

RockPebble 69M
2476 posts
1/23/2006 8:31 am

I have my first meeting(?) scheduled for next week, she seems nice. After 30+ years in sales I try to approach most situations without expectations. Mr. Murphy will make sure 99 out of 100 times it is very different from what you expect. If you just let it flow, it will be what it will be, sometimes it's surprisingly good.

aascrompn 42M
6444 posts
1/23/2006 8:37 am

I have met up w/ a group at my local meet and greet. I had a great time.

WildChild5884 32F

1/23/2006 9:04 am

Well Devinitydesires you're not in that boat alone..if it makes you feel any better I think a lot of us go into this stuff at least a little naive. My first two meets I am a bit ashamed to admit I wasn't the brightest bulb in the box listening to some of the rules..and thank the heavens above neither of them were crazy types so I got very lucky..Important thing seems to be you've smartened up along with most of us newbies.. Just remember the tried and true if you decide to get back out there GL

WildChild5884 32F

1/23/2006 9:08 am

Forgive me such an obvious typo Divinitydesires lol and gl again

redmustang91 57M  
8572 posts
1/24/2006 3:16 pm

I have met a few women in real life and they were nice. One was a little bizarre, but it is all interesting. Because I am a guy and women are generally not violently crazy or , I have not felt physically threatened. I meet for lunch or drinks. Sadly often there is no chemistry, but that is just the breaks. I am still trying! Hope it works out for you DD! call or write me sometime!

WildChild5884 32F

1/25/2006 2:07 am

That's always good because occasionally I think I could be crowned the typo queen However the more I look around here I see it happens to the best so it makes me feel better.
Yeah definitely safer now I got about the same experience of a friend telling me not to ever do that again. lol But I always get addresses, numbers, and I even saw one guys id..his idea not mine to put me at ease. As well as verifying everything..Statistically it's more dangerous for women I think..The guys should be careful too though I'm with ya on that.

ibgood2u 60M
11 posts
1/26/2006 7:46 pm

Hello to you all. I have just discovered blogs and I am loving it.
I have talked to several women and met a few, been stood up by a few, and am still friends with one.
I agree that we need to be safe. Even before I read the safety tips I have always suggested meeting in a public place of her choosing for coffee or such, but still I had one that wanted me to meet her at her home, where I found out that she lives alone, and it was late at night because she got out of work late that night. Another gave me her home phone number after one e-mail, this makes me uncomfortable. They were lucky that I am not a bad man.
Ladies be smart, be safe please, because it could turn out bad...
Thanks for listening...

Become a member to create a blog